ZeroNowhere570

I’m a long-time member here, and although I don’t post much, I lurk around a lot. I need advice and I’m only asking here because I have no one else to ask advice of.

I currently work a Monday to Friday schedule (dayshift). I like my job actually. I like my supervisors, co-workers. I’ve actually no complaints, but I do shop around on jobs to see what is out there.

I accepted a position where I’m going to be making roughly $6/hr more, but it is overnights 7pm-7am, on a 2x2x3 rotating schedule. I am scheduled to start my orientation tomorrow morning, so this weekend has been filled with preparations.

I handed in my two week notice at my current job already, and I got a lump in my throat because my heart is only in this move halfway. It seemed all the while giving my notice, in the back of my mind I knew I was making a bad decision.

I’m an alcoholic who is still struggling, so rational decisions are completely out the window. Would this move create more wealth for me? Yes. Would this move help myself become more marketable? Yes, but this move would also have me completely up-ending my life to revolve around working 12 hour overnight shifts, only seeing my partner about 2 hours per day. I fear this is going to throw me into a spiral of depression already worse than what I’m currently experiencing.

I need help you guys. What on earth do I do?

Cityboy

You already know what to do, it's just a matter of focusing your thoughts. Picture where you want to be tomorrow, 6 months, a year, two years, five years, 20 years from now. Then determine a course of action that's going to put you where you want to be. Follow through.

calmself

You already mentioned two benefits - higher pay and better marketability in the future. Alcoholic or not, I think you did what's right for your career at this time.

Stay in touch with your old team and let them know what you are learning new. If this does not work out for any reason, you can re join or look for an even better job. This fear is just beginners nerves, humans hate change. But remember, only change brings us to new horizons.

Don't worry and all the best. You will settle soon in this new role and do well.

doggonecarl

What has your partner said about the career change?

VikingGF

Whatever change you make now is not forever. It may be a stepping stone to something else, it could be an opportunity to further define what you want in the future or it could be great on its own. Don't worry about what isn't happening, go forward with a positive attitude and change what you need to change as it occurs. You can do this, and you can certainly do it sober.

ZeroNowhere570

She is upset, that we will no longer be sleeping together at night time.

advbike

You said you were an alcoholic who's still struggling. What did you mean by that? If your sobriety is shaky or you are in your first 6 months I would urge you to stay put in a stable environment and relationship. I worked graveyard shift myself when I was younger and its extremely disruptive to health and mental stability, partly because it disrupts our circadian rhythms.

Edit - just read some of back posts. I personally think you should stay put in your old job for now, if you can. Work on your sobriety and anxiety, which will improve over time. There will be more opportunities.

AlwaysGrowing

Maybe gracefully thank the new company for the opportunity and really want it but the timing just isn't right. Never burn bridges but show them how much you respected their decision to hire you.

Anna

It seems that the thought of the overnight 12 hour shift is making you nervous and you comment you're an alcoholic still struggling. I think it's significant that you are questioning your decision. Personally, I would not be able to adjust to turning my day upside down like that, but that's just me. Do you think you'll have trouble sleeping in the daytime and do you think your partner will adjust to the new routine? More money and a career boost are very good things, but so is being happy with your day-to-day life.

Dee74

Hey ZN

my dad worked shift work for 30 years.
You do get used to it.

If this is a vague fear of change, that’s natural

If you think you’ve made a mistake, or that you feel your recovery might be in danger, pump the brakes and act now.

D

Mizz

I do think you already have the answer. This job you have taken does not sound like it will fit with your life. There will be another opportunity for you. There are always opportunities that come and go. Im just not hearing that you are happy with your decision. Who wants to be unhappy? I surely dont.

Eddiebuckle

There is nothing wrong with trying this job to it to see if it works for you, but if you find it makes staying sober difficult drop it immediately. $6 an hour more is meaningless if you relapse.

Free2bme888

Big hugs

RunningScared

I've worked shift work all my life. I still have a life. For the pay increase, I'd say yes. But that's me.

FinallyLucid

You know yourself better than we do but I can say personally I am a morning person and I loathe nights. Doing the late shift is what accelerated my alcoholism because I couldn’t sleep without having a beer or two. I would highly suggest you try staying up a few nights during those hours and see how you function. Often time pay is better because no one wants to work those shifts. It’s not sustainable in the long term in my opinion and your mental sanity is more important than a few dollars per hour. Again I’m not telling you what to do but I wouldn’t touch the night shift with a 10 ft pole. Can’t sleep during the day and feel like a zombie half asleep and half awake all the time. Hell on earth in my opinion but that’s just my 2 cents. If you need the money it’s a different story but if it’s just to get some extra cash definitely think hard about this. Also Important is how slow are nights? If it’s chill AF maybe doable but if it’s the same pace just during horrible hours I’d take a hard pass personally.

On a side note, tell your former employer you want to stay and would like to stay employed as your circumstances changed due to unexpected and emergent family issues (just lie as you already have the new job locked up and don’t need a reference in case you change your mind).

Best of luck and don’t chase money do what makes you happy and keeps you sober and always keep your options open (no one looks out for you except you). And you know what? If you’re a good employee and they want you to stay ask for a retention bonus.

Delilah1

Hi ZN,

I am sorry you’re feeling so much anxiety about this new position. There are definitely many positives when you’re looking long term. Changing jobs is always a little scary, but you also need to be ready for the change.

Is staying in your current position an option now that you’ve given notice? If it’s not, then just focus on the new position and all of the good things it has to offer. If it is, talk to your boss and let them know you’ve been reflecting on how much you enjoy your current position and you were wondering if there was any possible room for advancement and if staying would be an option.

You may find you live the new position, and if you don’t, there is always the opportunity to look for a different job in a few months.

Sending you lots of love and positive vibes for whichever path you choose.

❤️Delilah

Colin1

Considering your words above, if I were in that situation, I would stay with my current job. There will be time later, once you have your sobriety and mental health better sorted out and are more comfortable with it to advance your career.

Whatever you decide I wish you all the best with it