2 years sober
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2020
Location: Canada
Posts: 1,100
2 years sober
Hello All
.
year 2 of sobriety did not go as planned at all. The first half was amazing because my daughter surpassed all expectations. She went from being depressed and withdrawn for over 2 years to maintaining a full time job and going on an international trip she arranged herself. She has matured into this most amazing young woman who is brimming with strength and determination. Just thinking about It makes me cry because that’s what having a dedicated, fully present mother does to a person. I do regret not realizing this earlier in her life but I don’t dwell on it. She won’t let me do that!
July 2021. A year and a half into my sobriety. I was noticing something was off with my partner of 25 years. He was drinking more and out partying a lot with his work mates. I begged to know if he was cheating a 100 times but he got angrier each time and kept gaslighting me. Said he would never cheat because it’s not in his character. Even told me I was going crazy!
Until Oct 26, the day I hacked into his messenger. It was both sexual and emotional. I seen her naked. She’s 18 years my junior. Like wtf!!!!
when confronted he dropped her and begged for forgiveness. He’s done personal counselling and we have our 3rd couples counseling session this month. It’s so hard. Nothing will ever be the same. But I’m not ready to give up.
Did me getting sober play a role in this? For sure it did. When I quit he lost his drinking buddy. I stopped going with the flow and started demanding more in regards to finances and household chores. My efforts to right our ship pushed him away. Which I’m fully aware is no excuse. What a dilemma I’m in.
on the plus side, also in July I started working out, partially acting on instinct, to win him back. Oddly enough our sex life was on fire throughout his affair. I thought we “levelled up” in our onion. Oh my!
Anyway, I’m 47 and my body is toned and flexible. Hip pain is gone. I’m truly in the best shape of my life. That was a major year 2 goal ACHIEVEMENT!
As far as temptation to drink goes, it’s not even on the radar anymore. I detest alcohol. Even non-alcoholic people make life altering mistakes under the influence. All I can say is don’t be afraid to question what society calls normal these days. Societal norms are not necessarily healthy!
Through sobriety from alcohol I’m emotionally solid at my core, even after what happened.
year 3, watch out because I’m going for the gold.
Stay strong sober warriors!
. year 2 of sobriety did not go as planned at all. The first half was amazing because my daughter surpassed all expectations. She went from being depressed and withdrawn for over 2 years to maintaining a full time job and going on an international trip she arranged herself. She has matured into this most amazing young woman who is brimming with strength and determination. Just thinking about It makes me cry because that’s what having a dedicated, fully present mother does to a person. I do regret not realizing this earlier in her life but I don’t dwell on it. She won’t let me do that!
July 2021. A year and a half into my sobriety. I was noticing something was off with my partner of 25 years. He was drinking more and out partying a lot with his work mates. I begged to know if he was cheating a 100 times but he got angrier each time and kept gaslighting me. Said he would never cheat because it’s not in his character. Even told me I was going crazy!
Until Oct 26, the day I hacked into his messenger. It was both sexual and emotional. I seen her naked. She’s 18 years my junior. Like wtf!!!!
when confronted he dropped her and begged for forgiveness. He’s done personal counselling and we have our 3rd couples counseling session this month. It’s so hard. Nothing will ever be the same. But I’m not ready to give up.
Did me getting sober play a role in this? For sure it did. When I quit he lost his drinking buddy. I stopped going with the flow and started demanding more in regards to finances and household chores. My efforts to right our ship pushed him away. Which I’m fully aware is no excuse. What a dilemma I’m in.
on the plus side, also in July I started working out, partially acting on instinct, to win him back. Oddly enough our sex life was on fire throughout his affair. I thought we “levelled up” in our onion. Oh my!
Anyway, I’m 47 and my body is toned and flexible. Hip pain is gone. I’m truly in the best shape of my life. That was a major year 2 goal ACHIEVEMENT!
As far as temptation to drink goes, it’s not even on the radar anymore. I detest alcohol. Even non-alcoholic people make life altering mistakes under the influence. All I can say is don’t be afraid to question what society calls normal these days. Societal norms are not necessarily healthy!
Through sobriety from alcohol I’m emotionally solid at my core, even after what happened.
year 3, watch out because I’m going for the gold.
Stay strong sober warriors!
Member
Join Date: Jul 2019
Posts: 710
The strength of the woman behind that message is inspirational Sober45 (now 47).
You deserve a great husband and now you have your own daughter to also show you the difference it makes to go about your own life with confidence and determination. Plus all the reasons you have given yourself to trust and admire and like and cherish what you see in the mirror. Keep up with the high standards because you are owning them.
Thank you very much for sharing this. All the very best for a great 2022
You deserve a great husband and now you have your own daughter to also show you the difference it makes to go about your own life with confidence and determination. Plus all the reasons you have given yourself to trust and admire and like and cherish what you see in the mirror. Keep up with the high standards because you are owning them.
Thank you very much for sharing this. All the very best for a great 2022
Member
Join Date: Sep 2021
Posts: 37
Originally Posted by Sober45 
Hello All.
year 2 of sobriety did not go as planned at all. The first half was amazing because my daughter surpassed all expectations. She went from being depressed and withdrawn for over 2 years to maintaining a full time job and going on an international trip she arranged herself. She has matured into this most amazing young woman who is brimming with strength and determination. Just thinking about It makes me cry because that’s what having a dedicated, fully present mother does to a person. I do regret not realizing this earlier in her life but I don’t dwell on it. She won’t let me do that!
July 2021. A year and a half into my sobriety. I was noticing something was off with my partner of 25 years. He was drinking more and out partying a lot with his work mates. I begged to know if he was cheating a 100 times but he got angrier each time and kept gaslighting me. Said he would never cheat because it’s not in his character. Even told me I was going crazy!
Until Oct 26, the day I hacked into his messenger. It was both sexual and emotional. I seen her naked. She’s 18 years my junior. Like wtf!!!!
when confronted he dropped her and begged for forgiveness. He’s done personal counselling and we have our 3rd couples counseling session this month. It’s so hard. Nothing will ever be the same. But I’m not ready to give up.
Did me getting sober play a role in this? For sure it did. When I quit he lost his drinking buddy. I stopped going with the flow and started demanding more in regards to finances and household chores. My efforts to right our ship pushed him away. Which I’m fully aware is no excuse. What a dilemma I’m in.
on the plus side, also in July I started working out, partially acting on instinct, to win him back. Oddly enough our sex life was on fire throughout his affair. I thought we “levelled up” in our onion. Oh my!
Anyway, I’m 47 and my body is toned and flexible. Hip pain is gone. I’m truly in the best shape of my life. That was a major year 2 goal ACHIEVEMENT!
As far as temptation to drink goes, it’s not even on the radar anymore. I detest alcohol. Even non-alcoholic people make life altering mistakes under the influence. All I can say is don’t be afraid to question what society calls normal these days. Societal norms are not necessarily healthy!
Through sobriety from alcohol I’m emotionally solid at my core, even after what happened.
year 3, watch out because I’m going for the gold.
Stay strong sober warriors!
.year 2 of sobriety did not go as planned at all. The first half was amazing because my daughter surpassed all expectations. She went from being depressed and withdrawn for over 2 years to maintaining a full time job and going on an international trip she arranged herself. She has matured into this most amazing young woman who is brimming with strength and determination. Just thinking about It makes me cry because that’s what having a dedicated, fully present mother does to a person. I do regret not realizing this earlier in her life but I don’t dwell on it. She won’t let me do that!
July 2021. A year and a half into my sobriety. I was noticing something was off with my partner of 25 years. He was drinking more and out partying a lot with his work mates. I begged to know if he was cheating a 100 times but he got angrier each time and kept gaslighting me. Said he would never cheat because it’s not in his character. Even told me I was going crazy!
Until Oct 26, the day I hacked into his messenger. It was both sexual and emotional. I seen her naked. She’s 18 years my junior. Like wtf!!!!
when confronted he dropped her and begged for forgiveness. He’s done personal counselling and we have our 3rd couples counseling session this month. It’s so hard. Nothing will ever be the same. But I’m not ready to give up.
Did me getting sober play a role in this? For sure it did. When I quit he lost his drinking buddy. I stopped going with the flow and started demanding more in regards to finances and household chores. My efforts to right our ship pushed him away. Which I’m fully aware is no excuse. What a dilemma I’m in.
on the plus side, also in July I started working out, partially acting on instinct, to win him back. Oddly enough our sex life was on fire throughout his affair. I thought we “levelled up” in our onion. Oh my!
Anyway, I’m 47 and my body is toned and flexible. Hip pain is gone. I’m truly in the best shape of my life. That was a major year 2 goal ACHIEVEMENT!
As far as temptation to drink goes, it’s not even on the radar anymore. I detest alcohol. Even non-alcoholic people make life altering mistakes under the influence. All I can say is don’t be afraid to question what society calls normal these days. Societal norms are not necessarily healthy!
Through sobriety from alcohol I’m emotionally solid at my core, even after what happened.
year 3, watch out because I’m going for the gold.
Stay strong sober warriors!
Member
Join Date: May 2019
Location: UK
Posts: 3,948
Originally Posted by Sober45
year 3, watch out because I’m going for the gold.
You’re a star. Well done on everything. How about a new sport for you too to maintain this toned and flexible you? You’re going to smash year 3.
Member
Join Date: May 2019
Location: UK
Posts: 3,948
Originally Posted by Sober45
I wanna dance. Being the introvert I am, joining a class won’t be easy but something inside me is saying shut up and do it!
Congrats on 2 years and congrats to your daughter as well, Sober45!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 5,937
Congrats on Two Years! That is AWESOME! 
As for the bad stuff, well that does suck. But I know you're in a much better position to deal with the trials and tribulations of life sober. It sounds like you have your life on a great path!
As for the bad stuff, well that does suck. But I know you're in a much better position to deal with the trials and tribulations of life sober. It sounds like you have your life on a great path!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2018
Posts: 5,171
Originally Posted by Sober45
don’t be afraid to question what society calls normal these days. Societal norms are not necessarily healthy!
Member
Join Date: May 2018
Location: Where I’ve longed to be all my life…..here, now.
Posts: 7,340
Hi sober 45!
You go girl!
Isnt it wonderful that sobriety makes our center so much stronger physically, mentally and spiritually?
Your husbands deceit, cheating behavior is ON HIM, and drinking won’t change what he did. You will decide whether to stick it out and always wonder about his fidelity or move on……I pray you have peace this year, and keep going strong.
Yep, bad things happen to those of us that keep on the sober path, and that’s just life. Drinking would only make things worse….
HUGE congrats !
You go girl!
Isnt it wonderful that sobriety makes our center so much stronger physically, mentally and spiritually?
Your husbands deceit, cheating behavior is ON HIM, and drinking won’t change what he did. You will decide whether to stick it out and always wonder about his fidelity or move on……I pray you have peace this year, and keep going strong.
Yep, bad things happen to those of us that keep on the sober path, and that’s just life. Drinking would only make things worse….
HUGE congrats !
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