Mental Stability
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Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: Georgia
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Mental Stability
How long after quitting did it take you to feel mentally stable? How long do you think it took your brain to heal? I know everyone is different, just wanting to know your own personal experiences. I知 almost 30 days (had 60 days 8/14-10/14 with a couple slips in Oct/Nov). This time around I just feel mentally unstable, for a lack of a better term. For example, I知 having unwanted thoughts - not really thought of drinking but just other weird random thoughts. I don稚 and won稚 act on them, just hate having them.
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Join Date: Nov 2018
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I wouldn't worry about unwanted thoughts, as long as they are not obsessive. Our brains are pretty busy, and a lot of nonsense bubbles up from our our unruly subconscious. It might even be a good thing, as it gives us a chance to sort through truths about ourselves.
So how long did it take me to become more stable? That's a hard question, because I was so euphoric when I finally knew I was done with drinking that I paid little attention to mental stability. In fact, we can argue that euphoria is anything but stable, and that it is not a good gauge of actual mental health. I'm not even sure what stability should look like. I know a lot of people who are quite stable in their thinking, while much of their thinking defies reality. I think a better gauge of mental health is how honestly we manage and sort out our thoughts, rather than if we like them or not.
So how long did it take me to become more stable? That's a hard question, because I was so euphoric when I finally knew I was done with drinking that I paid little attention to mental stability. In fact, we can argue that euphoria is anything but stable, and that it is not a good gauge of actual mental health. I'm not even sure what stability should look like. I know a lot of people who are quite stable in their thinking, while much of their thinking defies reality. I think a better gauge of mental health is how honestly we manage and sort out our thoughts, rather than if we like them or not.
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Join Date: Jan 2014
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Originally Posted by DriGuy 
I wouldn't worry about unwanted thoughts, as long as they are not obsessive. Our brains are pretty busy, and a lot of nonsense bubbles up from our our unruly subconscious. It might even be a good thing, as it gives us a chance to sort through truths about ourselves.
So how long did it take me to become more stable? That's a hard question, because I was so euphoric when I finally knew I was done with drinking that I paid little attention to mental stability. In fact, we can argue that euphoria is anything but stable, and that it is not a good gauge of actual mental health. I'm not even sure what stability should look like. I know a lot of people who are quite stable in their thinking, while much of their thinking defies reality. I think a better gauge of mental health is how honestly we manage and sort out our thoughts, rather than if we like them or not.
So how long did it take me to become more stable? That's a hard question, because I was so euphoric when I finally knew I was done with drinking that I paid little attention to mental stability. In fact, we can argue that euphoria is anything but stable, and that it is not a good gauge of actual mental health. I'm not even sure what stability should look like. I know a lot of people who are quite stable in their thinking, while much of their thinking defies reality. I think a better gauge of mental health is how honestly we manage and sort out our thoughts, rather than if we like them or not.
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Join Date: Dec 2019
Posts: 2,426
It took me about 6 months before my thoughts and thought processes started to rewire and settle down some. I think us nag-headed addicts tend to be above-average intelligence but we also commonly carry around over-active minds.
I hope D122y weighs in here. He has forgotten more about what we all did to our brains than I will ever know.
I hope D122y weighs in here. He has forgotten more about what we all did to our brains than I will ever know.
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Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Sonoran Desert & Southeast Asia
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It certainly depends on the person and their issues.
For those whose main problem was simply excessive drinking leading to alcoholism, one might expect mental and emotional stability to return after some period of months, but it will vary with the person. For those of us who had precipitating issues that led us to drink in the first place (trauma, anxiety, shame, etc), it takes a lot longer because first we have to stop medicating (remove the booze) and only then can we really begin to address the dysfunctional thinking and emotional processing (and why we began drinking to begin with), because none of that ever gets resolved while we are still using the substance of choice. These other issues may take time to address and work through, preferably with a counselor or group sessions.
For those whose main problem was simply excessive drinking leading to alcoholism, one might expect mental and emotional stability to return after some period of months, but it will vary with the person. For those of us who had precipitating issues that led us to drink in the first place (trauma, anxiety, shame, etc), it takes a lot longer because first we have to stop medicating (remove the booze) and only then can we really begin to address the dysfunctional thinking and emotional processing (and why we began drinking to begin with), because none of that ever gets resolved while we are still using the substance of choice. These other issues may take time to address and work through, preferably with a counselor or group sessions.
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Hi Jillian,
If you can, try to ignore the random intrusive thoughts. If you pay attention to the thoughts, it seems that our brains will continue to produce them. Something that helps me is to have a specific 'calm, happy' thought that you can go to whenever something unwanted appears.
If you can, try to ignore the random intrusive thoughts. If you pay attention to the thoughts, it seems that our brains will continue to produce them. Something that helps me is to have a specific 'calm, happy' thought that you can go to whenever something unwanted appears.
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Join Date: May 2012
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My experience was that I was reluctant to accept/address my mental health issues after quitting so it drug out literally for year. I think most of us have some kind of underlying issue that we attempted to solve with alcohol, but of course the results are usually the opposite. For me it was anxiety, and while things did improve a bit initially, the act of quitting in itself was not a solution. I struggled for about a year and a half before I finally got some professional help to sort things out, and looking back I really wish I would have done it sooner. But bottom line I had to accept my mental health issues as real and needing specific attention, just like I had to do with my addition.
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Join Date: Jun 2017
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I知 having unwanted thoughts - not really thought of drinking but just other weird random thoughts.
When I was drinking, all my thoughts were centered around the next drink. Today my mind is not tethered to alcohol, so it has a lot more room to roam around. I am grateful for the spontaneity of my thoughts today. My thoughts are like my children. I don't want to rule them with an iron fist, just to patiently guide them in a positive direction.
I have been in recovery for a few trips around the sun and my brain is still healing, but the more I let go and just experience, the more healing takes place. All I can say is WOW!!! I think I am getting it! Today, I am just enjoying the experience. I can make judgements at a later time.
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Join Date: Sep 2021
Location: Central NC
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Think back to the time before drinking became a problem for you. Did you have any weird, random thoughts then? I know I did, long before I ever even touched alcohol. I believe alcohol can certainly distort our thinking and lower our inhibitions enough to act on those thoughts and impulses in inappropriate ways, but I think it's just a condition of being human that everyone experiences those kinds of thoughts to varying degrees.
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Join Date: Nov 2012
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I know that when I relapsed in 2014 for a few months, my recovery was very hard.
At a month sober, I was also feeling off still...not myself.
I think that when we are in a vulnerable state, thought attacks can seem overwhelming.....but we do not have to listen to them.
Thoughts are automatic....we get to choose which ones we listen to. And we get to tell the ones that are hijacking us to go away.
I used to say out loud (to my head): THANKS FOR SHARING. I still do if I get stuck in the past or start being upset about things I cannot change.
Around 3 months sober, I noticed that it had all gone away...the racing thoughts and the weird thoughts. I felt mentally healthy as well as physically healthy again.
s
At a month sober, I was also feeling off still...not myself.
I think that when we are in a vulnerable state, thought attacks can seem overwhelming.....but we do not have to listen to them.
Thoughts are automatic....we get to choose which ones we listen to. And we get to tell the ones that are hijacking us to go away.
I used to say out loud (to my head): THANKS FOR SHARING. I still do if I get stuck in the past or start being upset about things I cannot change.
Around 3 months sober, I noticed that it had all gone away...the racing thoughts and the weird thoughts. I felt mentally healthy as well as physically healthy again.
s
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Join Date: Oct 2021
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I believe that our thoughts are only as potent as the power we assign to them. Whatever happens, all thoughts are transient. They will come and go, sometimes without warning. I have troubling or negative thoughts sometimes but usually after I deal with them they lose their power. A great way of doing this is meditation, it allows you to be mindful and in control. I've heard meditation described as sitting on the side of the road and watching the cars go by. As your thoughts appear, imagine them passing by like the traffic. This way you begin to realise youre not controlled by your thoughts but it is your true self that is in control. Im just a novice at this but it's helped me so far and I hope you get the gist.
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Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: Georgia
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Thank you guys, you are awesome. All this is very helpful. I知 still feeling off, like Venus mentioned in her first month. Everyday does seem to be getting better though. I spend so much time in my head and trying to stop. Seeing my therapist next week after stopping in Oct.
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Join Date: Mar 2008
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I started feeling more stable around 3 months, but felt much better around 6 months. It took me another 6 months before I felt totally secure in my emotional stability but definitely around 6 months I was feeling pretty good and secure.
I still get odd thoughts and/or feelings, but it's easy to dismiss them/ignore them.
I still get odd thoughts and/or feelings, but it's easy to dismiss them/ignore them.
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Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: Australia
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Hmm. Mental wellbeing is a big topic for me.
I feel like it took me about 6 months to reset mentally. Then I had to face the underlying social anxiety that contributed to my drinking. I would seize up and find it hard to speak up in public settings, like contributing to a roundtable discussion.
The solution was multi-pronged. Part of it was that I needed to reset physically, part of it was that I lacked confidence in myself (the part I had masked with drinking for so long), part of it was that I felt constantly pressured to prove my worth professionally.
In summary:
1. It was a physiological issue in the short-term - I had to have 6 months sober to fix that.
2. In the medium term, I had to deal with the underlying psychological reasons - that took me about 2 years to address.
3. And then in the longer-term I went for a root-and-branch overhaul of my life so I would only do work that I felt 100% aligned with and never have that feeling of faking it in my professional life. I'm in the middle of that. It started at about year 3 and is still going in year 6.
I think the answer to your question is that it took me 6 months but there was deeper and more rewarding work to do which I couldn't have done without being sober. I couldn't have tackled 2, without step 1. And I sure couldn't have dreamt of step 3 without having accomplished both 1 and 2.
I feel like it took me about 6 months to reset mentally. Then I had to face the underlying social anxiety that contributed to my drinking. I would seize up and find it hard to speak up in public settings, like contributing to a roundtable discussion.
The solution was multi-pronged. Part of it was that I needed to reset physically, part of it was that I lacked confidence in myself (the part I had masked with drinking for so long), part of it was that I felt constantly pressured to prove my worth professionally.
In summary:
1. It was a physiological issue in the short-term - I had to have 6 months sober to fix that.
2. In the medium term, I had to deal with the underlying psychological reasons - that took me about 2 years to address.
3. And then in the longer-term I went for a root-and-branch overhaul of my life so I would only do work that I felt 100% aligned with and never have that feeling of faking it in my professional life. I'm in the middle of that. It started at about year 3 and is still going in year 6.
I think the answer to your question is that it took me 6 months but there was deeper and more rewarding work to do which I couldn't have done without being sober. I couldn't have tackled 2, without step 1. And I sure couldn't have dreamt of step 3 without having accomplished both 1 and 2.
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Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: New England
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Around 3 months I noticed my thinking was clearer, my self talk was wayyyyy more positive and my anxiety was pretty much gone. I still have my moments, but they are just that, moments. I'm sure there is more to come but I feel ready for it, and if I'm not, someone here will help me!
Congrats on near 30 days, Jillian. Good work, keep going. It gets better.
Congrats on near 30 days, Jillian. Good work, keep going. It gets better.
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