Day 419 checking in
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2020
Posts: 637
Day 419 checking in
Hello sober recovery family
Just wanted to check in. I'm still taking it one day at a time. Ive been popping in here and there over the last few weeks due to work and family commitments. What I have been dealing with is balance. Couple post ago I had written about compassion fatigue. I'm still learning and growing just like most things in life there has to be a balance. Sometimes too much of a good thing can also lead to stress and anxiety I noticed. I quickly notice myself neglecting my self care what I mean is I've been having alot of stress. Then I take a look on what I can do I noticed that I can do less. My nature and even through out my addiction Ive always placed others needs and wants before my own when possible. I'm not being anti against helping others in need. But I recognized my life has become out of balance. Has anyone been feeling the same way. I have to put my recovery first so everything I love won't come last.
Just wanted to check in. I'm still taking it one day at a time. Ive been popping in here and there over the last few weeks due to work and family commitments. What I have been dealing with is balance. Couple post ago I had written about compassion fatigue. I'm still learning and growing just like most things in life there has to be a balance. Sometimes too much of a good thing can also lead to stress and anxiety I noticed. I quickly notice myself neglecting my self care what I mean is I've been having alot of stress. Then I take a look on what I can do I noticed that I can do less. My nature and even through out my addiction Ive always placed others needs and wants before my own when possible. I'm not being anti against helping others in need. But I recognized my life has become out of balance. Has anyone been feeling the same way. I have to put my recovery first so everything I love won't come last.
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Join Date: Feb 2021
Location: London
Posts: 333
You have to take care of yourself first before you can help others. Many people 'help' others before taking care of themselves first and it reminds me of the phrase 'the road to perdition is paved with good intentions'. I am in AA and i see this all the time. You aren't selfish taking care of yourself until you are ready to help others but you are worse than selfish if you don't and still try to 'help' others to make yourself feel better.
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Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,513
It's always important to take care of yourself. Helping others is important too, but, as you said, it takes balance.
I'm a strong believer in the balance in all aspects of life. For me, I knew I would have to balance specific recovery-related activities, with time with family, exercise and spending quiet/me time, if I was going to succeed in recovery.
I'm a strong believer in the balance in all aspects of life. For me, I knew I would have to balance specific recovery-related activities, with time with family, exercise and spending quiet/me time, if I was going to succeed in recovery.
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Join Date: May 2019
Location: UK
Posts: 3,945
Originally Posted by stickyone 
I have to put my recovery first so everything I love won't come last.
You’ll be (already are) a far better and nicer person sober. Keep on doing what you’re doing and everyone will benefit.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2020
Posts: 637
Originally Posted by WaterOx
Yes absolutely I can relate big time.
You might be someone who has struggled with boundaries. My advice is to work on those any way you can. It's a life savor for people who have compassion fatigue.
You might be someone who has struggled with boundaries. My advice is to work on those any way you can. It's a life savor for people who have compassion fatigue.
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Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Sonoran Desert & Southeast Asia
Posts: 6,561
Fantastic progress Sticky!
I have the same problem with always putting other's needs before my own, especially emotional needs. And setting boundaries.
You're doing great my friend.
I have the same problem with always putting other's needs before my own, especially emotional needs. And setting boundaries.
You're doing great my friend.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2017
Location: Scotland
Posts: 3,837
Congratulations on your sober time, that is really impressive! 
I am in a caring profession and compassion fatigue goes with the territory, at times. Keeping up a self-care routine is hard and I think acknowledging when and why is slides is definitely the first step in recognising that something is going a bit wrong. Take good care of yourself, you are doing amazingly well.....xx
I am in a caring profession and compassion fatigue goes with the territory, at times. Keeping up a self-care routine is hard and I think acknowledging when and why is slides is definitely the first step in recognising that something is going a bit wrong. Take good care of yourself, you are doing amazingly well.....xx
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