treeguy24

I was TOTALLY off base tonight with my posts. I don’t know what I was thinking. Honestly, I guess my emotions took the better of me. I relapsed. The point is that isn’t the person I am. That isn’t the type of person I want to present myself as on the forum. I am sorry. I should NOT have said some if the things I said. I have no anger whatsoever towards this forum. I simply let my emotions take over and wasn’t thinking as I was typing. That’s on me.

Anna

Thanks for the apology Treeguy. I'm glad you're back and ready to work on your recovery.

gypsytears

I’m glad you’re posting tree guy. Everyone has setbacks. Tomorrow is another day to work on being the best you.

SWB

We’re here for you.

Dee74

I think it shows a great strength of character to come back here, apologise and admit your mistakes treeguy.
thanks

D

least

Make this your last day one.

nez

Thanks treeguy24. I can understand as addiction made me into a person that I wasn't either. In recovery I am learning to be the person that I want to be. Ain't there yet, but I am closer than I was yesterday. A work in progress...but what a great process it is!

Also the beauty is that it is an equal opportunity process, available to anyone willing to do the work.

Bekindalways

Sigh . . . . if you are having a melt down, come sit next to me . . . .Great gawd almighty have I been cranky and beyond the last few days.

Kudos to you Tree for coming back.

Surrendered19

Hi Treeguy. I read your posts on here and earlier today and I'll just give you my two cents. I started lurking on this forum about a year ago and got sober last November. It has been a ride.

One of the first things I noticed is the complex nature of posts and how people respond to them. There is a secret sauce there that nobody has the recipe for. A person seeking support who comes across as belligerent and another who comes across as the most kind and receptive person ever each will post something and the support comes pouring in for both. Two others will post and might get very few replies. There is no rhyme or reason and there are no conspiracies afoot. It is just the nature of online interaction. So many variables.

Us addicts are such a self-centered bunch and it is so good for us to work on that. So, early on I had to remember that why people post on this thread and not that thread - or my thread - is not knowable and none of my business. When I feel like I need support, the best thing I can do is start offering support to others. That connection makes me feel part of something and that is great support all by itself.

Erica375

Awww, Treeguy, I'm just glad you decided to stick around. I go off my rocker at times, too. Usually it's my sister who gets the earful, and I'm fortunate she loves me enough to listen and talk me down from the ledge.

Good on you for calming down and apologizing. I've been on enough recovery sites to have seen people get their nose bent out of shape, give everyone a big eff-you, and disappear. So happy you didn't do that!

BeABetterMan

Meh, no biggie. This **** is a roller coaster man. I always tease my AA group and tell them the only reason I'm there is because they're the only people with low enough standards to accept me into their group. All other groups have run me off, lol. That's kind of like SR, we'll be here for you in your stumbles and in your triumphs. I apologize if I haven't responded to your posts. I don't remember over looking them, but you have to keep in mind that we are all fighting our own battles. I know I personally have only so much life energy. And although I'd like to respond to everyone, I'm an empath, and it takes some energy out of me. I also feel like sometimes I don't know what to say, or don't have any good advice to give. So I feel like saying "hang in there" or something to that effect seems almost like a disservice. Remember, as with all things in life we need to be patient and open to what the future holds for us if we do the things we're supposed to do.

I wasn't offended by the posts you made. Probably a lot of people weren't in fact. A lot of us are in a place of recovery where we are not as reactive as we were. Where we don't take things as personal. Where we see that you are struggling and lashing out because you are in pain and searching for a way out.

Do what you have to to get help. Do it here, do it in meetings, do it with counselors...whatever it takes.

ReadyAtLast

Good to see you back. We've all had angry days and times. It does take strength of character to come back. Maybe join the October class too where you'll meet others at the same journey point as you

Phil71els

Ya gotta take the rough with the smooth. That was the rough, now on to the smooth. Time to put the work in and listen to the folks here, they have all been there and got through it. Take any advice to mold it to your situation. This wont be an easy ride but it is achievable with the right work but in my experience you get back what you put in.
One big lesson is no one is coming to save you, the only person who can do that is yourself.
Use your frustrations to focus on getting a plan together. Good luck.

iAmSam

There's nothing wrong with voicing your frustration.

I think Nez did a terrific reply to your other thread (the now locked one).

I just wanted to add one thing that I'm really surprised hasn't been mentioned in relation to
you having less replies than compared to others:

You are not a alcoholic. Your problems are with opiates. (at least that's what you posted)

Honestly, just on that note alone, you're lucky to get even half the replies you've got.
As far as I know, we're not even really supposed to be giving advice on most things but instead
sharing our experiences (or that's just a guideline to keep it more civil?). If 99% of the people posting here are here because of alcohol issues then
it makes sense that you'd not have much replies, but you did. <---at least I thought

I read nez's response last night so don't remember it verbatim but I'm in agreement - I've not been
inclined to respond to your posts because I thought you were more journaling your thoughts as opposed
to looking for help.

Sadly, and please let me know if I'm completely off base, the frustration and questioning you were showing yesterday was you not under the influence. This post is after you relapsed.
I'd personally rather have you pissed off, frustrated and talking about it than you beat down, apologizing and relapsing.

take care, man and please come back no matter what shape you're in.

StartAnew68

No idea what went down but I've had melt downs on here before and people would much rather you stayed than go - which is what the old cowardly me used to do.

As Dee says, it takes courage to stay and apologise. You should just recognise this positive and big step and carry on posting.

Be123

I'm addicted to alcohol. When I drink alcohol I'm not pleasant to be around. Imagine the wise guy that thought 'I know, let's put a load of addicts together for their mutual benefit'. Haha that person is a lunatic!!

But it works because we can feel each other's troubles. If I don't feel them then someone else here will. Feeling neglected, resentful, angry, over looked? - yep, I got all those stickers.

Sounded off at people who didn't really deserve it? I'm the king of that.

You are amongst friends

(Probably the most self-effacing and funny comment I ever heard about alcoholics hanging out together was an old boy, 40+ years sober who was going to an AA conference which included 80,000 members meeting in a sports stadium (in Canada if I remember correctly). He was telling our group he was going and how much he was looking forward to it and ended:

'I'm amazed anyone let's us do it: imagine if we all went on the ****?' 😂😂

Nonsensical

Getting sober was the most highly personal thing I have ever done.
I sometimes took it personally, too.

Sober45

Hi Treeguy Getting and staying sober is HARD! Good on you for coming back and making amends. I hope you're having a good sober day. Either way, please let us know how it's going.

Bethany57

It's ok. You are human. Takes courage to apologize.

Verdantia

Hey Treeguy--I am glad that you're sticking around. We are often not at our best here because we are in a life-and-death struggle with alcohol. There is a LOT of fear, pain, hurt, and resentment. Nerves are raw, emotions are on edge--this often isn't nice and neat; our illness is humiliating and vicious--it takes us away from our best selves and from logical behavior. It takes maturity to stand back and apologize and to continue to fight on. Wishing you all the best on your sober journey.