FutureMe

Went through wicked withdrawal earlier this year in January. Took 2 weeks off from booze, then made the choice to keep on drinking, and withdrew again in February, but not as bad. Took the entire month of March off from booze and cleared my head. Then when I resumed in April, things were different. I don't drink enough to get a buzz, I don't get that formerly-awesome warm burning after a shot that was always what I was seeking. There is no fun in it anymore, just more of a habit. I am tapered back down to 4 shots a day spaced out across 8 hours. For that pesky reason that only we know, my AV doesn't want to just stop. However, I am as healthy as I was years ago, organs checked out fine in March with a full scan. Now is the time to be accountable and quit while I am ahead.

I tried 2 counselors, but their constant need to make sure I wasn't using listerine
or eating poppy seeds was too overbearing.

I usually lurk here, but decided to post today. Developing myself a new plan, as now its time to try again.

8 hours until I hit the hay, just hoping I can call this day 1, again. As this is my usual time to start, work is over, sitting at home. Maybe I will go for a walk and check in again later.

LumenandNyx

Hi,

I realize you're pretty new here and all (at least when it comes to writing in the forum) but honestly - I didn't see anything in your post that makes it clear you're ready to quit drinking.

To be perfectly blunt - plans and trying are for folks who expect or hope to drink again. The only thing on your plan that is ever going to work 100% is Don't Drink Alcohol.

You don't have to try to stop drinking. Just do it. Just don't swallow any more alcohol.

I realize this sentiment annoys some people a great deal. Here's the thing. I was an acute, late-stage alcoholic for nearly 23 years. I tried to stop. I've had 50 plans over all this time. I've been to therapists, hospitals, treatment centers, jail, had family involved, friends involved, my kids involved - nothing worked. Until I finally JUST STOPPED DRINKING. I was able to detach from the emotion that accompanied my drinking. I'd had enough.

That's it. Period.

Anna

Hi FutureMe, It's good to see you again.

It's good that you've cut down on drinking, but, I'm glad that you see that your AV is in the way of you stopping for good. You're right that this is a good time to stop for good. Are you ready to make the commitment to live a sober life. It's normal to feel unsure, even scared at this point, but you can look around here and see many of us who have stopped for good and are happy to have done so.

Sober45

Welcome, FutureMe, glad you are here.

Sounds like you've been working up to this for a while and the fact that you have some long periods of sobriety behind you is a really good thing. You know how to do it. But of course, staying stopped is always the trickiest part.

For me, I've been able to stay stopped for 8 months now. Coming here daily has played a HUGE role in that. By coming here and reading and supporting others every day, my "sober spirit" stays alive and there is little room left for the AV to come in. I would not trade for sobriety for anything!

You can do it!

Gabe1980

Welcome back FutureMe, it's great that you are posting.

Sounds like you know the time has come......just make sure you plan for cravings and when things get tough.

Dee74

Hi FutureMe - welcoem back

Yeah a day one is a great goal - no matter how much I was drinking I was still polluting my brain, corrupting my soul and still enslaved to addiction.

Posting here tells me that, at some level, you're ready for change - we can help

D

Hevyn

It's great to see you again, FutureMe. Keep talking to us - we understand like no one else can. You're never alone.

Sammy1980

Everyday just tell yourself not today!

ImNotThatGuy

Hey FutureMe, I hope you manage to quit for good. Your situation doesn't sound like much fun.