PhoenixJ

You are a thoughtful human, Leigh.

Willow00

Leigh, my heart is heavy for you too I think it’s a very beautiful and loving thing to drop off the lovely gifts to everyone, and especially to your unwell friend (the stickers are gorgeous too). I think it’s a beautiful thing that you’re giving them to everyone so she doesn’t know you know, and you’re not singling her out. I totally understand that your friend doesn’t want people to know and doesn’t want to see anyone else except those very close family. And it’s so good and understanding that you’re able to respect her wishes for privacy, despite how hard it must be for you. I’m sure her family will rally around her and give her comfort, and likely be protective of her too. I’m sure they will all appreciate your discretion about it and will be very grateful ❤️

When my Mum knew she was dying, she didn’t want anyone except immediate family with her, and she was very clear about it to me. Several of her friends wanted to come and see her because they knew she was unwell (she was in hospital) but she didn’t want to see anyone in her final days. I had the difficult job of fielding phone calls and enquiries about her well being, and their wishes to visit her. One lady was very persistent despite me gently telling her that Mum really wasn’t up for any visitors at the moment. That same lady had a go at me after Mum passed away because I wouldn’t let her visit. She was very annoyed at me at the time and also afterwards. At Mum’s funeral I explained to her again that Mum had asked me to please just tell people she wasn’t well enough for visitors right now. It was awful, I’d just lost my darling mother and I was on the receiving end of this lady’s anger, but I was just following Mum’s wishes. I think we all grieve in our own way, and grief does funny things to us. It’s such a hard time for everyone involved. I still miss her every single day ❤️

SoberLeigh

Thank you, PhoenixJ. I am humbled.

Willow, I am so sorry that you had that experience with that lady after your Mum died. Losing your Mum was hard enough without any of that added misery. It is wonderful that you were able to honor your Mum’s wishes; my deepest respect to you for doing so.

We will all, someday, deal with our own mortality. The decisions we make regarding our final months, weeks, days . . . . well, it is hard to anticipate them. How those final times are to be spent with family must be so exceedingly important.

I am terribly uncomfortable with having this information.

Robbie64

I love that record, I bought it at the time and think I may still have it. Sheer class. It's 30 years ago today since it was in the UK top 20 which again makes me wonder where the time has gone.

Willow00

Leigh I think you’re doing a wonderful thing keeping quiet about what you know, although it must be a huge strain on you emotionally. I guess all you can do, is honour her wishes and keep it to yourself. It’s a terribly tricky time, and I agree, I think it’s very important for people to be able to spend their final moments with those they wish to. Some people are very private, and I imagine I might only wish my closest family to be there. I know the time I spent with my Mum and immediate family was very very precious ❤️
Sending you lots of love at such a difficult time for you ❤️

Mags1

Good Morning Weekenders

Leigh, it’s a difficult time for your friend and all around her. Especially you knowing her terminal illness and having to keep quiet. But you know, as us with an addiction, we can use our present, the here and now. I know you’ll find inner strength to enjoy this precious present time with her. None of us know what tomorrow holds. xx

Mags1

Willow, it must’ve been so hard for you love. xx

Mags1

New thread begins

https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...er-2020-a.html (Free as a bird - Weekenders 11 - 14 September 2020)