johnnyb68

Hello - I'm on 21 days, the first time in 35 years to get this far, but it seems to be getting harder, not easier. I am really not happy and am so irritable...will it ever get better ?

Dee74

Hi and welcome
21 days is great but it will probably take a little while longer to feel consistently good after 35 years drinking.

Things will get better!

D

johnnyb68

Thanks D, the cravings just won't go away...driving me crazy at the moment. Thanks for replying, I just needed to share the pain with somebody...

Dee74

there are some good tips here

https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...-cravings.html (CarolD's tips for cravings)

Misssy2

johnny 21 days is really a great thing. I'm sure that you are noticing so many things that I have been noticing on day 30.
Sleeping better, feeling better, looking better, eating better, focusing better....

When you get the cravings do you act fast to try and replace the thoughts or take a walk outside....immediately?
I used to keep a bag of hersey kisses so I could eat them when I had a craving.
Talk to a friend.
Ride a bike
Lift some weights
Take a nap

Sometimes nothing helps and people cave...but you have to really try to push thru it if you don't want to go back to a day 1....
I feel for you because horrible cravings are difficult....

johnnyb68

Thanks for the help, I'm going to buy a big block of chocolate, hopefully that will help...will deal with the sugar problem later...I feel like that will be an easier fix..cheers to chocolate.

D122y

My goto drug/therapy is exercise. Doing something good for myself plus the adrenaline etc. I get give me a reason to never drink.

I used to be hungover so much at the gym. I missed so many work outs or was unable to perform at my best because I was dope sick.

Unfortunately, I am older, 55, and I don't have the energy I used to have, but I give it my best. If feel like my cardio is better than the weight lifters and my weight lifting is better than the cardio folks.

The competition is all in my head.

I have a bit of PTSD from my drinking days, but never having to worry about getting a DUI or going to work drunk is a great feeling.

Folks can count on me.

I don't look at myself as an ex drunk any more. That was for the early days.

Now I am a non drinker that hates booze. I never want the poison in my body ever again. Drinking is not my thing.

Thanks.

least

Dee is right, it will take some time before you return to anything like normal functioning. But in the meantime, things will improve day by day. The best advice I got in early recovery was to shore up my sobriety with gratitude. I practice gratitude every day and it's amazing the difference it makes in my life. And the more I am grateful for, the more I find to be grateful for. It multiplies.

Early recovery can be a bumpy road sometimes, but stay strong and sober and it will get better.

johnnyb68

Thanks for the tips, OK so chocolate first then a run tonight to work it off during the worst time of day..6-9pm. If I can make it past 9:30pm I have another day under my belt.

johnnyb68

but I am so irritable and short tempered, is this normal at this stage ?

NicLin

Things def get better, the joy comes and so do tough moments, but I truly believe life is so much more beautiful in sobriety.

Congrats on 21 days!

Dee74

It was normal for me.

Think about it - part of you wants to quit drinking and part of you is still craving it. That's annoying and tiring.

Its a big change - give yourself a little time to get used to it Johnny

D

Willow00

Johnny I found icecream really helps, both to ward off the cravings and to improve my mood
It may not be the healthiest option, but it definitely helps me and it beats drinking hands down.
Daily exercise also helps me.
You’re doing great.
I was a daily drinker for close on 35 years too, and I got sober for a year but then relapsed. I’m back at 55 days, and it definitely gets better with time.

Gabe1980

Good on you John, keep going. Your mood will improve along with your health

someday147

keep going john you're doing great

MaximusD

John, you have 35 years drinking so it is going to take more than 3 weeks to get better and remember, being irritable etc is normal. We will feel all emotions when we are sober and being sober doesn't mean we wont ever feel negative emotions. Go day by day and most importantly never stop trying even if you slip keep posting. those are the keys.

johnnyb68

Thank you all for the encouragement yesterday, Day 21 was the toughest so far, so tough I actually plucked up the courage to post on here, first ever post anywhere I think ! I don't know why yesterday was so hard but the good news is I'm still here on Day 22. Better news was I actually felt sort of good this morning for the first time since I stopped drinking.

MaximusD

That is going to start to happen more and more often. Be prepared for setbacks though with an option other than relapse.

Robbie64

I used to post on a stop smoking newsgroup many years ago and everybody used to warn about the "terrible 3's" - 3 days, 3 weeks, 3 months and 3 years. They were the points at which people were likely to go back to smoking and I would say it's the same for drinking too. At 3 days you are over the initial withdrawals (or hopefully are over them), at 3 weeks the novelty of not smoking / drinking / drugging has worn off and life can sometimes feel empty. I've only ever got to 3 months twice in my life and both times I relapsed not too long after (4½ months and 3½ months respectively) as I suddenly lost the will to stay sober and felt very bored and irritable. I've never got to 3 years so I'm not sure why people are more likely to lapse then.

Well done on getting beyond 21 days. But as MaximusD has posted, be prepared for setbacks and have a plan in place if the urge to drink strikes again.

johnnyb68

Thanks Robbie - the empty feeling, the feeling I'm missing something, that's what is gnawing away. But, got to be happy with 22 days, get through today I'm at 23 and that's unheard of..more chocolate coming...