Agreed with my AV to drink after 90 days - then changed my mind
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Join Date: Jul 2020
Location: United Kingdom
Posts: 466
Agreed with my AV to drink after 90 days - then changed my mind
Hi everyone,
I'll be 28 days sober tomorrow (19th) and feel great
BUT
I actually temporarily agreed with my AV earlier today to drink after 90 days. It's reasoning was "hey, your liver etc will be fine by then. Plus, you don't wanna do this forever, do ya?" Well, I agreed for about 10 minutes then realised I had lost my sanity.
So I spoke to my AV again and said "Ha, good one. Almost got me" and smashed the dirty little worm on the head
I guess it was a lesson on not getting complacent if things are going well.
Hope everyone is okay today
I'll be 28 days sober tomorrow (19th) and feel great
BUT
I actually temporarily agreed with my AV earlier today to drink after 90 days. It's reasoning was "hey, your liver etc will be fine by then. Plus, you don't wanna do this forever, do ya?" Well, I agreed for about 10 minutes then realised I had lost my sanity.
So I spoke to my AV again and said "Ha, good one. Almost got me" and smashed the dirty little worm on the head
I guess it was a lesson on not getting complacent if things are going well.
Hope everyone is okay today
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2020
Location: United Kingdom
Posts: 466
Originally Posted by biminiblue 
I really don't like these trick clickbait titles that suggest someone I care about has had a drink.
Glad it wasn't true.
Glad it wasn't true.
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Join Date: Oct 2016
Location: South Africa
Posts: 1,535
Hi Owen, I understood your thread title the way I think you intended it to be. Of course being with you in the July class, I know your sobriety age and it helped.
I relate to your post, even though I feel strong in my early sobriety. May I suggest (as much to myself as to anyone else) that you keep reinforcing that “I don’t drink anymore, no matter what”-mindset.
I relate to your post, even though I feel strong in my early sobriety. May I suggest (as much to myself as to anyone else) that you keep reinforcing that “I don’t drink anymore, no matter what”-mindset.
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Join Date: Jul 2018
Posts: 2,279
I'm on day 173 (just had to check there!) and I often have thoughts about drinking in the future.
I rationalize this by knowing I don't ever want to drink NOW, and as long as this continues I will never drink...I genuinely do not want to drink, there isn't any will power involved for me, the 'ME' in me does not want a drink.
I also accept I was 20 years a drunk and I don't expect the addiction or habit to die off easily. Of course I still think about it, like I think about sports I used to play and people I used to know. That's ok, I think it's natural, it was a huge part of my life
Well done on thinking this through. 28 days and not drinking today...you should be proud of yourself
I rationalize this by knowing I don't ever want to drink NOW, and as long as this continues I will never drink...I genuinely do not want to drink, there isn't any will power involved for me, the 'ME' in me does not want a drink.
I also accept I was 20 years a drunk and I don't expect the addiction or habit to die off easily. Of course I still think about it, like I think about sports I used to play and people I used to know. That's ok, I think it's natural, it was a huge part of my life
Well done on thinking this through. 28 days and not drinking today...you should be proud of yourself
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Join Date: May 2019
Location: UK
Posts: 3,922
Well done, Owen.
It’s more of a mental thing rather than physical/liver health. Yes, after x months, the liver might be enjoying a well-earned rest, but drinking again will reset all withdrawal/urge levels to day one levels. Please accept you’ll never drink again, and your AV won’t get a look in
It’s more of a mental thing rather than physical/liver health. Yes, after x months, the liver might be enjoying a well-earned rest, but drinking again will reset all withdrawal/urge levels to day one levels. Please accept you’ll never drink again, and your AV won’t get a look in
Member
Join Date: Dec 2019
Posts: 184
Contraz on 28 day.
I discovered today my liver and kidneys are working properly again, which is a small miracle considering how much I've drunk. I jokingly said I should celebrate with a bottle of wine!
Not really funny though, and considering the doctor said they weren't working properly at one point, the next binge could put me, or anyone really, beyond the point of no return. You only get one life as far as we know, may as well take care!
I discovered today my liver and kidneys are working properly again, which is a small miracle considering how much I've drunk. I jokingly said I should celebrate with a bottle of wine!
Not really funny though, and considering the doctor said they weren't working properly at one point, the next binge could put me, or anyone really, beyond the point of no return. You only get one life as far as we know, may as well take care!
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Join Date: Feb 2020
Location: Eastern US
Posts: 1,386
Great to hear Owen! I would agree with others though and caution you to not interact with your AV that much. At least for me, if I were to do that a few times it would win for sure. I cannot even go down that path with my AV. Keep up the good work and I am happy to have you with me in the July thread. Together we are stronger.
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Join Date: Feb 2018
Location: Nsw
Posts: 408
Originally Posted by owen90
Bah, can an admin rename the thread please? Honestly didn't intend to mislead.
After that agreement weekends were ok, then late afternoons and then beer on the way to work all over again. I'm sure when u wake up in the morning of day 91 you will be grateful to be sober
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Join Date: Dec 2019
Posts: 184
I often have had the thought that if I get my stuff together, I'll be able to drink in the future. It's just an unrealistic dream for me though. An addiction specialist has pretty much said the same as people here - the kindling has got so advanced, it doesn't matter when I try, I'll be back to square one addiction-wise extremely quickly. So even if I could mentally change enough to drink responsibly (just about theoretically possible), it wouldn't matter because my brain chemistry is so well adapted to alcohol.
It's easier to let it go. Moderating, even if it were possible, would be an unpleasant full time job.
It's easier to let it go. Moderating, even if it were possible, would be an unpleasant full time job.
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Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: Arizona, USA
Posts: 1,598
A few days ago I had convinced myself to drink this weekend. All of the crazy thoughts, all of the justifications. Then I told myself to be patient and let the insanity pass. It took almost a day but I am over it and I’m so grateful. I credit my involvement with AA, my newfound commitment to lifelong sobriety and my friends at SR.
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Join Date: Oct 2019
Posts: 741
I think for a lot of us once its in our heads that a drink is acceptable at 90 days or whatever, then its like well 85 is pretty good, then how about 75.
Today has nothing to do with day 90. If your like me the bad of drinking today is overwhelmingly greater than the good. The same will be true in 90 days. You can be sure your AV is overstating the upside of a drink. Don't get too caught up in what happens at day 90.
Today has nothing to do with day 90. If your like me the bad of drinking today is overwhelmingly greater than the good. The same will be true in 90 days. You can be sure your AV is overstating the upside of a drink. Don't get too caught up in what happens at day 90.
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