owen90

Hello everyone. I called in sick to work today to start my alcohol recovery. Ive been a functioning alcoholic for about 8 years. I just turned 30 recently and decided that I dont want to die and/or lose everything. I am scared as hell.

freedomfries

Good job starting. Do you have any sort of plan for recovery?

owen90

yeah ive got a call back from my doctor today for help with physical detox. I feel uncomfortable in face to face situations so I'm looking into online help and out patient care.

MaximusD

Owen, I have a therapist that I talk to through the computer and it works. There are online AA meetings. With the virus lots of stuff is available from home. What are you scared about?

owen90

Yeah I think an online therapist is best for me too. I'm nervous about admitting it to friends and family mainly, as ive hidden it from pretty much everyone

MaximusD

Why admit it? You don't have to admit it do you? There are TONS of excuses for stopping drinking that are totally believable. Especially if they don't know of your issues with it.

Dee74

Hi Owen

you've found a good community to be a part of.
Like you I showed up here terrified but sick of drinking 13 years or so ago. Been sober since. If I can do it, you can too

D

owen90

thanks Dee

MaximusD

You can tell them that you quit because your on a diet. I have told people I am trying to cut body fat. I have told people as I have gotten older even a little bit gives me a headache. I have told people I am over it. Saving money. There are many things you can say without saying you have an issue.

owen90

Good ideas. Thanks mate

Steely

I just say I don't drink.

MissPerfumado

Maximus is right. Just share what you're comfortable sharing. I decided to come clean to my immediate family, because at least my parents knew I had a problem even if they didn't know the extent. It helped me draw a line in the sand and stay accountable.

As for friends, I told a couple of close ones that I was quitting for good because I needed to, but for others, I adapted as I felt the situation merited. For some, I was just taking a break, or giving up to see how I felt, or being careful because alcoholism runs in my family, or trying to get very fit. They all had a grain of truth in it.

It's a personal decision. Read around here and you'll find 1000s of different stories, different experiences, different things that worked and didn't. The one thing we have in common is that we needed help to stop drinking.

Welcome aboard!

owen90

Thanks for the support.

Abraham

I'm sure you will notice alot more than other people. Say what you want but quit for yourself. Its a very good decision on your behalf. Best of luck to you, and stick around. Just stopping by and reading and posting helps alot.

CRRHCC

I was a functioning alcoholic and recreational drug abuser for more than 4 decades. Drugs and alcohol allowed me to reverse my feeling of helplessness, feeling trapped, powerless and out of control to circumstances in life that I felt were important to me and overwhelming. Drugs and alcohol allowed me to temporarily escape that trap of helplessness. We are all driven to seek the neurochemical reward of happiness. All human behavior is driven by the pursuit of happiness (reward) and that, when we choose a specific behavior, we do so because we see it as our, "best available option for happiness, at a given moment in time." The only way you will stop desiring heavy substances and change your behavior is by seeing more happiness (value) in the change than in the using. This isn't rocket science its human psychology and behavior science.

When our values and purpose in life trump our addiction, there simply is no addiction! If you have no good values and purpose in life, it's time to find them.

Romans 12:2: "Don't be conformed to this world, but be transformed with new thinking."

FishingDude30

Similar story here. 30 years old and the boozing was unmanageable. Seeing a counselor was what really tipped me over the edge. Basically he helped me articulate what I know I need to do and give me a clearer vision of how to proceed. I’m using AA and have loved it after a rocky start.
I 100% relate to what you said in another post about not wanting to tell friends or family. At this point the only people who know about my alcoholism/recovery is my counselor, AA folks, and everyone here on SR.
37 days so far! Glad you are here, Owen!

LumenandNyx

Quitting is hard. Getting to the point where you have to quit is also hard and it takes a lot of drinking and time.
You can do this.


As for telling others what you're up to - you don't have to say anything to anyone unless you want to. When I quit, all I said was - "I don't drink anymore." If someone asked why, I'd say "Because."

People get it and unless they're rude - they don't press the issue. You know? The WHY isn't important. The act IS.

I've found online meetings to be extremely helpful because my anxiety skyrocketed once I quit. Now I've been given something called Clonidine to help with it even though it's originally an RX for high blood pressure. Of course, I've yet to take any because pills in general freak me out. But I digress.

All my best to you and keep sticking around. This forum hosts some pretty cool folks with loads of stories and experience!!

Sober45

Welcome aboard! I'm 45 and have been sober for the last 6 months....almost 7. The thing that tipped the scale for me was keeping the spirit of sobriety alive. Staying active in my sobriety every single day stops me from entertaining the ludicrous idea of drinking again. There is just so much to learn on here. A few things from my perspective:
1. It takes time. Many of the bad feelings I was using alcohol to extinguish were actually caused by alcohol. Anxiety and other difficult emotions is a normal part of recovery. Working through them instead of drinking has brought me a level of freedom i cant explain. Have patience.
2. I'm not missing out-the feeling of missing out and just wanting to be normal always brought me back to booze. Today, I feel like I'm on the other side and I feel bad for all those drinkers who cannot see what I now see. I'm making gains every days.
3. Being a happy sober person takes work: gratitude, making changes, making amends, fixing our wrongs. Painful? yes. As bad as the hangovers and self-loathing I had? Not even close!

Not many people know I'm an alcoholic. I've been telling most people I did a dry January for fun and now I just prefer being sober. Tell them whatever you're comfortable with.

You can do this!

MaximusD

The people that care and ask why probably have drinking problems themselves.

FishingDude30

this ^^