Strugglingto

I don't know how long it is appropriate to start these update threads before it becomes boring and/or like spamming the site.
I have not had the cravings people talk about. I don't take that to mean they won't hit me but so far, no.
I feel 'normal' now but again I am not sure I remember normal. Maybe better is the best way to describe it. Anxiety no, I feel better going to the supermarket and being able to look people in the eyes and not feel like I am acting.
But the days seem endless and yesterday and today I just feel this crippling depression.

ReadyAtLast

It's normal to feel really low so soon after quitting. It does get better though and if it doesn't then def see your doctor.

Hawkeye13

Emotions are pretty much a rollar-coaster ride in the beginning--the brain is healing and your hormones, etc. need to reset.

It will improve. Just keep taking good care of yourself--you deserve it.

BrianK

I really enjoy update threads like this. They help me keep my feet on the ground and watch for things like mood swings, depression, sudden cravings that come out of nowhere. Knowing that other people here are dealing with these things too, or that I can come here and be real takes some of the pressure off this life change. Glad to hear things are at least better

Strugglingto

Better by a huge amount. Energy returning, more rational, more functional, better able to cope.
The challenge now is to reassemble life again.
That is not a trigger, because all the triggers have, well, already been triggered.
I had a bit of an epiphany today. I asked myself "did I actually enjoy drinking?" It was fun once. It wasn't anymore and I realised that the biggest trigger for my drinking of all was drinking itself. The need to refuel to stop the crippling withdrawals. Being like a phone with 5% battery left or a car running on empty. To work I needed vodka to recharge and refuel.
The cause of the illness was also the medicine for the illness
I had every withdrawal symptom in the book and more at one point or another. Sometimes in combination, sometimes just one. And there was no consistent pattern. Pins and needles in my face being one that I have not seen listed. Because of this it took me a long time to realise they all had the same cause.
I then realised the things I identified as triggers for my drinking were caused by my drinking.

LostLilly

Dee74

You can journal as long as you like strugglingto - congrats on day 13

D

D122y

I am sad right now because i am trying to get enough rest to get up to go to work at 130 am.

It brings me down. I am trusting my supervisor to keep an eye on my schedule. There are 25 of us. I am the next in line seniority below my boss.

Honestly, I lack the intangibles. I get it. It just gets old.

But, at least I am now sober. I used to drink over this stuff.

I made my bed and I have only me to blame.

I know my problems are pathetic compared to some folks.

I have my health, I have enough money, I have my family.

Thanks for letting me complain.

Thanks.