Tests and rewards for passing them
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Join Date: May 2019
Posts: 365
Tests and rewards for passing them
Over the past week, life has been throwing tests in front of me, giving my AV a chance to speak and my true voice a chance to tell it to STFU.
Once, someone annoyed me a lot. I think they may have been subconsciously trying to get me to drink. My AV was like, "Go have a drink! That'll show 'em!" I did not drink, much to that person's surprise. Test passed!
Just a few hours after that incident, someone else did something very nice for me. It was like a little reward for passing.
Another time, I was in a situation where the mood was happy. Alcohol was available. It was a perfect excuse to drink. I did not drink. Another test passed!
Just a couple hours later, someone complimented me on looking good. That felt nice! Coincidence or little synchronistic message from the Universe? I'd like to think the latter.
Anyway, I feel like paying attention to life and treating it sort of like a game with challenges and rewards is fun and beneficial. I know there will be many more tests to come but that they will get easier to pass as time passes.
Once, someone annoyed me a lot. I think they may have been subconsciously trying to get me to drink. My AV was like, "Go have a drink! That'll show 'em!" I did not drink, much to that person's surprise. Test passed!
Just a few hours after that incident, someone else did something very nice for me. It was like a little reward for passing.
Another time, I was in a situation where the mood was happy. Alcohol was available. It was a perfect excuse to drink. I did not drink. Another test passed!
Just a couple hours later, someone complimented me on looking good. That felt nice! Coincidence or little synchronistic message from the Universe? I'd like to think the latter.
Anyway, I feel like paying attention to life and treating it sort of like a game with challenges and rewards is fun and beneficial. I know there will be many more tests to come but that they will get easier to pass as time passes.
For some reason, it seems human nature to notice the negatives. If we consciously seek out the positives, we can find them and it helps change our outlook. For me this takes practice, but the positive returns are measurable. Continue to look and you will see them continuously along your journey. Sometimes we have to look really hard to find them and at other times they are at the forefront. They are always present. There are always positives in our life.
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Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Atlanta
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I am quite opposed to the idea of looking at tests and challenges and rewards in the way you describe- I am glad it works for you...hope it keeps that sober life you are building.
To me, uses of words and phrases like "battle" and "test" and "the Beast" are unduly negative and counterproductive to the kind of peace I want. The rewards of living sober are just....omnipresent. Perhaps this connects directly to the fact I always talk about emotional sobriety- I don't have a carrot-stick mindset or look at something as "being done to me" and so on.
Just my $0.02.
To me, uses of words and phrases like "battle" and "test" and "the Beast" are unduly negative and counterproductive to the kind of peace I want. The rewards of living sober are just....omnipresent. Perhaps this connects directly to the fact I always talk about emotional sobriety- I don't have a carrot-stick mindset or look at something as "being done to me" and so on.
Just my $0.02.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2019
Posts: 365
To me, uses of words and phrases like "battle" and "test" and "the Beast" are unduly negative and counterproductive to the kind of peace I want.
Seeing these things as "tests" just helps me to isolate them and recognize them as situations that used to give me a "reason" to drink. The rewards -- feeling and looking good, acting right -- are where I keep my focus.
The word "trigger" doesn't appeal to me because, let's face it, it never really took much of an excuse to drink. I drank when I was happy. I drank when I was sad. To me it's more like a little test that I can easily ace.
I would say that life improved for me when I really made an effort to start my day with gratitude and end the day with gratitude. When I took 10 minutes at the beginning and end of every day to focus on what had happened that day I was grateful for, acknowledging the nice good stuff, which could sometimes be as simple as getting a warm smile from a little old lady I started to see the world in a much more positive light. These things were always around me but while drinking I only focussed on the negatives xx
It also appeals to me that one can identify feelings as negative and isolate them for alternative thinking about what to do. It may be putting the thought aside for another time, dismissing the idea(s) completely, or actively countering them with positive views. It's nice to think about when things are going well, too, to reinforce our thinking in the best possible way about who we are and how that fits into a program or plan of being sober.
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