New Sobriety - Doing Well?
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Join Date: Jan 2019
Location: Charlotte, NC
Posts: 500
New Sobriety - Doing Well?
Hey ya'll...
I guess I'll start off by a little of my backstory. I'm 31 years old. I started drinking socially when I was 20. In my mid 20s I was happy, engaged to be married, career was going well, everything was all good.
When I was 28 my relationship ended badly, and I was severely depressed, anxious, alone, and turned to alcohol. Somehow, I hid it well. My career was doing better than ever. I would be at the office Monday-Friday 9-5, doing my thing, and doing it well. At 5, like clockwork, I'd stop at the liquor store, get a 750ml bottle of vodka, 2 32oz gatorades....go home...drink til I passed out. Woke up at 7am, went to work, repeat.
As expected, the alcohol wasn't helping cure my depression, I was wildly out of shape, and I was headed to rock bottom.
When I was 31...6 months ago...I decided enough was enough. I quit drinking cold turkey. No help, no AA, no rehab, I had just had enough. I was 20 days into my sobriety when my body decided to let me know that I was too late....
I had a stomach ache. I figured...alright...I'm bloated....probably just part of detox. I chugged water, popped some gas-x, went to bed. Woke up, stomach hurt more and was now insanely distended. Okay....fine....I'll bite the bullet and make a doctor appointment. I got to my general doctor and he looked at me like I was a ghost. He said "Chris, not trying to freak you out, but I'm shocked you're alive right now, you need to get to the hospital immediately".
Got to the hospital and was admitted. Hooked me up to a ton of machines, poked me, prodded me, drained me, poked me more....I was there for a week. Diagnosis...stage 4 liver failure, cirrhosis, jaundice, ascites, kidneys in partial failure, gallstones, acute hypertension....my body had given up on me. 31 years old and dying.
I'm sitting at my office as I type this. I have a sticky note that I keep track of my days sober. 156 days without a sip of alcohol. I've lost 38 lbs, my eyes are bright, my skin is normal, my ascites is gone. My BP is normal, I can breath normally again. I feel healthy.
I know my health problems aren't going away. I know I'm not going to live to be an old man. But right now, I'm sober, and I feel more alive than I've ever felt. I see things so clearly. It's not easy, and I there are days that I just want to drink, but I won't. I choose life.
I guess I'll start off by a little of my backstory. I'm 31 years old. I started drinking socially when I was 20. In my mid 20s I was happy, engaged to be married, career was going well, everything was all good.
When I was 28 my relationship ended badly, and I was severely depressed, anxious, alone, and turned to alcohol. Somehow, I hid it well. My career was doing better than ever. I would be at the office Monday-Friday 9-5, doing my thing, and doing it well. At 5, like clockwork, I'd stop at the liquor store, get a 750ml bottle of vodka, 2 32oz gatorades....go home...drink til I passed out. Woke up at 7am, went to work, repeat.
As expected, the alcohol wasn't helping cure my depression, I was wildly out of shape, and I was headed to rock bottom.
When I was 31...6 months ago...I decided enough was enough. I quit drinking cold turkey. No help, no AA, no rehab, I had just had enough. I was 20 days into my sobriety when my body decided to let me know that I was too late....
I had a stomach ache. I figured...alright...I'm bloated....probably just part of detox. I chugged water, popped some gas-x, went to bed. Woke up, stomach hurt more and was now insanely distended. Okay....fine....I'll bite the bullet and make a doctor appointment. I got to my general doctor and he looked at me like I was a ghost. He said "Chris, not trying to freak you out, but I'm shocked you're alive right now, you need to get to the hospital immediately".
Got to the hospital and was admitted. Hooked me up to a ton of machines, poked me, prodded me, drained me, poked me more....I was there for a week. Diagnosis...stage 4 liver failure, cirrhosis, jaundice, ascites, kidneys in partial failure, gallstones, acute hypertension....my body had given up on me. 31 years old and dying.
I'm sitting at my office as I type this. I have a sticky note that I keep track of my days sober. 156 days without a sip of alcohol. I've lost 38 lbs, my eyes are bright, my skin is normal, my ascites is gone. My BP is normal, I can breath normally again. I feel healthy.
I know my health problems aren't going away. I know I'm not going to live to be an old man. But right now, I'm sober, and I feel more alive than I've ever felt. I see things so clearly. It's not easy, and I there are days that I just want to drink, but I won't. I choose life.
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Join Date: Oct 2017
Location: New England
Posts: 1,224
Welcome. And thank you for this. A very real reminder of the negative consequences of alcohol abuse.
You sound like you are in a good place spiritually. Wish you continued strength in your recovery.
You sound like you are in a good place spiritually. Wish you continued strength in your recovery.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2019
Location: Charlotte, NC
Posts: 500
Thanks ya'll. It's a weird feeling. Feeling so healthy, but knowing I'm not. It's almost a bad thing because I no longer have the constant reminder of the devastating consequences of alcohol. There are days I think, "well, I feel great, maybe I'm cured and can have a drink again". Thankfully I usually snap out of that feeling real quick. Staying active and busy helps me a ton. When I get bored is when the thoughts enter my head.
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Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 2,872
Hello and welcome to this place.
I got shivers reading your post, too.
I've been sober ten years and still come here for reminders like yours's, so thank you.
First of all, I'm glad you're alright health wise. I was in very bad shape when I finally quit, too.
Don't listen to those thoughts in your head telling you you're cured and can drink again. I went through those for the last ten years of my drinking and gave in to them. All it did was keep me drunk and sick.
I don't get them any more and I think part of the reason is coming here and reading posts like yours.
Congratulations on your sober time and remember, you never have to drink again.
Thanks again and best to you.
I got shivers reading your post, too.
I've been sober ten years and still come here for reminders like yours's, so thank you.
First of all, I'm glad you're alright health wise. I was in very bad shape when I finally quit, too.
Don't listen to those thoughts in your head telling you you're cured and can drink again. I went through those for the last ten years of my drinking and gave in to them. All it did was keep me drunk and sick.
I don't get them any more and I think part of the reason is coming here and reading posts like yours.
Congratulations on your sober time and remember, you never have to drink again.
Thanks again and best to you.
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Join Date: Nov 2018
Posts: 5,169
Well, that's one Hell of a wake up call, although you seem to be recovering from some serious symptoms. I hoping that life long abstinence will solve the problem. I hope this is the case. I doubt that taking up drinking again will lead to such luck again. That was some pretty serious stuff.
A friend of mine with near 20 years of sobriety took up drinking again about 3 years ago. He's dead now, and while I lost touch with him after he fell off the wagon, I heard his death was alcohol caused and centered around his liver, which he had abused for 20 years before he sobered up. Your liver and kidneys may now be readily susceptible to further abuse for the rest of your life.
I'm not a doctor, but I doubt that you can ever drink safely again. But then, you don't have to.
A friend of mine with near 20 years of sobriety took up drinking again about 3 years ago. He's dead now, and while I lost touch with him after he fell off the wagon, I heard his death was alcohol caused and centered around his liver, which he had abused for 20 years before he sobered up. Your liver and kidneys may now be readily susceptible to further abuse for the rest of your life.
I'm not a doctor, but I doubt that you can ever drink safely again. But then, you don't have to.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2019
Location: Charlotte, NC
Posts: 500
Originally Posted by DriGuy 
Well, that's one Hell of a wake up call, although you seem to be recovering from some serious symptoms. I hoping that life long abstinence will solve the problem. I hope this is the case. I doubt that taking up drinking again will lead to such luck again. That was some pretty serious stuff.
A friend of mine with near 20 years of sobriety took up drinking again about 3 years ago. He's dead now, and while I lost touch with him after he fell off the wagon, I heard his death was alcohol caused and centered around his liver, which he had abused for 20 years before he sobered up. Your liver and kidneys may now be readily susceptible to further abuse for the rest of your life.
I'm not a doctor, but I doubt that you can ever drink safely again. But then, you don't have to.
A friend of mine with near 20 years of sobriety took up drinking again about 3 years ago. He's dead now, and while I lost touch with him after he fell off the wagon, I heard his death was alcohol caused and centered around his liver, which he had abused for 20 years before he sobered up. Your liver and kidneys may now be readily susceptible to further abuse for the rest of your life.
I'm not a doctor, but I doubt that you can ever drink safely again. But then, you don't have to.
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Join Date: Nov 2018
Posts: 5,169
Originally Posted by WhoDeyPI
Thanks for telling me that. That's crazy about your friend. Scary and sad. I had so many doctors in the hospital telling me different things...of course they all said I can never drink again, but they couldn't seem to come to an agreement on the extent that my liver would be able to heal itself. Back then, my liver physically hurt, which I didn't even know was possible.
Either way, it's safe to say that alcohol abuse is not good for anyone's health. At best, some people drink and get away with it. Those who have recovered from serious physical symptoms I would think are highly at risk.
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Join Date: Jan 2019
Posts: 510
Wow. I agree this is a powerful story. It truly is a great thing to read for anyone thinking of going back to the bottle or comtemplating quitting. Your sober time is wonderful. Kudos to you. I'm on day 24 and thankfully have no desire to start again.
I'm curious- now that you are six months in, do you see improvement in all the tests they originally performed?
Best of luck to you and thanks for sharing!
Hope
I'm curious- now that you are six months in, do you see improvement in all the tests they originally performed?
Best of luck to you and thanks for sharing!
Hope
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Join Date: Jan 2019
Location: Charlotte, NC
Posts: 500
Originally Posted by kiki26
Wow this sent chills down my spine too. I’m so glad you are sober. Keep up the great work on sobriety, I’m right behind you at 131 days 
Friday night: Got home, cooked dinner, binged Netflix, fell asleep by 10.
Saturday: Woke up at 7, got a haircut, went on a 5 mile hike at a new nature preserve, went to dinner with friends, asleep by 10.
Sunday: Woke up at 8, made a nice breakfast, went on a run, watched a basketball game, went to the bowling alley with friends.
Monday: up early at the office ready to go!
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Originally Posted by HopefulYear777
Wow. I agree this is a powerful story. It truly is a great thing to read for anyone thinking of going back to the bottle or comtemplating quitting. Your sober time is wonderful. Kudos to you. I'm on day 24 and thankfully have no desire to start again.
I'm curious- now that you are six months in, do you see improvement in all the tests they originally performed?
Best of luck to you and thanks for sharing!
Hope
I'm curious- now that you are six months in, do you see improvement in all the tests they originally performed?
Best of luck to you and thanks for sharing!
Hope
My blood work had been normal, and my liver enzyme test (I think that's what they called it) showed consistant liver improvement every time I took it. I'm on 5 different prescriptions with unlimited refills. 1 is Lasix (strong diuretic), 1 is Spironlactone (stronger diuretic for heart and liver failure), 1 is some form of b1, 1 is a multi-vitamin, then the last one is like some from of iron potassium nonsense. Anyway, I just take the pills and hope for the best!
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Join Date: Jan 2019
Location: Charlotte, NC
Posts: 500
Not that it matters, but my "number" in the original post was off. According to my sticky-note, today I'm 158 days sober.
Anyway, I joined a Monday night bowling league to fill my Monday nights, which used to be a big drinking night for me to "shake off" the "shakes" from the weekend. I never really bowled at all, but bought a ball, shoes, a bag...everything I need to look official LOL. It's fun, and I'm slowly getting better. Had to deal with some drunk opponents last night. Man, belligerent drunks sure are annoying!
Anyway, I joined a Monday night bowling league to fill my Monday nights, which used to be a big drinking night for me to "shake off" the "shakes" from the weekend. I never really bowled at all, but bought a ball, shoes, a bag...everything I need to look official LOL. It's fun, and I'm slowly getting better. Had to deal with some drunk opponents last night. Man, belligerent drunks sure are annoying!
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