1 is too many 1000 is not enough.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2018
Posts: 177
For me it's a mental thing. Once I start drinking something in my head changes, it's like a pilot switching over to auto pilot , I'm no longer in charge Alcohol is now in control and will take me wherever it chooses . by the time alcohol hands control back I'm in a heap on floor. Sick broke full of regret and shame.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2018
Posts: 5,169
That first drink was always a killer. Toward the end of my drinking, I very seldom had the goal to get hammered. I would sit down with a drink after work, with the intention of relaxing and having a civilized cocktail. One led to another and then another, and the whole thing would change from civilized and sophisticated to just being half aware and foggy brained.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: MN
Posts: 8,704
Truth be told, I probably knew the answer to my question as some people have pointed out on this thread and has been discussed on this forum many times. At the end of the day the how's and why's are irrelevant because as alcoholics its absolute. We can not drink. How or why we can't drink doesn't matter, alcohol will ruin us.
ps. I had an uncle that struggled with alcoholism badly. He would go stretches of 4-5 years without a drink and then cave in, and he would drink around the clock for a month or so and end up in jail or hospital. Every single time. Sadly he died not long ago.
ps. I had an uncle that struggled with alcoholism badly. He would go stretches of 4-5 years without a drink and then cave in, and he would drink around the clock for a month or so and end up in jail or hospital. Every single time. Sadly he died not long ago.
quat
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: terra (mostly)firma
Posts: 4,823
My problem with booze was always More, indulging the desire just made indulging all that much easier.
No More booze fixed all those problems.
I’m more than comfortable with No More , my Beast on the other hand hates it , too bad for It.
I think the one thing that lets me be truly comfortable with No More and sensing the Beast’s hatred of that tack, is accepting that I can have more , but I don’t ,
I have chosen to have No More ever again. I could if I wanted to , but I don’t want to , my Beast does , but like I said too bad, there is much freedom with my perspective .
There is never ‘enough’ , indulging the desire will never satisfy It , more just feeds and strengthens It.
I reached my limit in the amount of mind , body and soul I will spend in indulging a bottomless pit of desire .
No More booze fixed all those problems.
I’m more than comfortable with No More , my Beast on the other hand hates it , too bad for It.
I think the one thing that lets me be truly comfortable with No More and sensing the Beast’s hatred of that tack, is accepting that I can have more , but I don’t ,
I have chosen to have No More ever again. I could if I wanted to , but I don’t want to , my Beast does , but like I said too bad, there is much freedom with my perspective .
There is never ‘enough’ , indulging the desire will never satisfy It , more just feeds and strengthens It.
I reached my limit in the amount of mind , body and soul I will spend in indulging a bottomless pit of desire .
Member
Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: Los Angeles
Posts: 133
I think the question reminds me of why I know I can't drink. I'd do the usual thing that many on here have: Tempt the fates on some occassion (no matter how unimportant) such as "hey, I had a really good work out!" or "man, i've been good for two weeks, I deserve just one beer, two is my limit!"
Of course, right after the first beer I'd drink the next one and full of a good buzz, head to the store for another couple of tall cans. That would get me F'd up enough to pass out pretty good only to wake up with cotton mouth and a headache, with a body that felt lethargic. That meant guess what?? Gotta head back to the store for a "recovery beer" which actually meant 2 more tall cans, and the whole things starts over again. I'd binge for a few days then have to detox for 3 whole days while my mind thought paranoid thoughts and I have horrid nightmares while I sweated up the bedsheets.
Whoa, that was cathartic! But yeah, no more of that socially acceptable poison for me guys.
Of course, right after the first beer I'd drink the next one and full of a good buzz, head to the store for another couple of tall cans. That would get me F'd up enough to pass out pretty good only to wake up with cotton mouth and a headache, with a body that felt lethargic. That meant guess what?? Gotta head back to the store for a "recovery beer" which actually meant 2 more tall cans, and the whole things starts over again. I'd binge for a few days then have to detox for 3 whole days while my mind thought paranoid thoughts and I have horrid nightmares while I sweated up the bedsheets.
Whoa, that was cathartic! But yeah, no more of that socially acceptable poison for me guys.
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