SoberMidAgeGirl

I am sober 120 days today, that's 4 months, or according to my calendar 17 weeks. I feel stronger, and I'm calmer. One of the reasons I was drinking was so much was due to a combination of both anxiety and depression, when I was drunk I would start out feeling happy, and end up depressed and crying. In between the happiness and crying was anger, which my family bore the brunt of. I don't feel intense joy, but I'll take this calmness over the drunken emotions any day. I am sleeping better, and actually dreaming again, turns out when I passed out, I didn't dream and my sleep was not good. My face looks better, I no longer have dark puffy dark circles under my eyes, my lips are hydrated, and I've lost weight. I put a considerable amount of work into my secret drinking! Between making sure I always had bottles of vodka secretly stashed all over the house, (going to different liquor stores, carrying a big purse to sneak them into the house) to hiding the empties and making sure they were well hidden in the garbage each week, and hiding how ill I was took a great deal of time and creativity. I also estimate I have saved around $400. My whole existence revolved around obtaining, consuming, and hiding cheap vodka. Now, I actually have the energy to clean the house, and spend time with friends and family. I make an effort to thank God many times during the day for my new sober life because I realize it would take so little to send me back to the darkness, and clinging to the hope I have in God has gotten me this far and I'm just so thankful. Thanks for this website, and thanks for reading.

CaptainHaddock

Welcome SMG! Well done on 4 months of sobriety. That is where I am as well.

Great to see all the positives that you are already experiencing. It is such a relief to be rid of that “secret life”.

Please dive into the forums and post often. It is really supportive and a lot of fun, especially once you get to know a few people around here.

Dee74

Congratulations on 120 days

D

Gerard52

Well done.

MantaLady

Great Job!

I could have written your post myself SMG! I used to drink to stop feeling down and depressed, and at the beginning of the session I would feel happy and chatty and great, in the middle of the session I too would get angry and lash out at whoever whatever I could...then would come the poor me tears, uncontrolable sobbing feeling like life wasn't worth living till I pass out drunk and the cycle starts again.

It's great to be free of that, you have done an amazing job and keep up the good fight! xx

Jim1958

Good for you. That is great to hear! Keep going!

Fearlessat50

Congrats! Wow, this was me too toward the end of my drinking! I am a sober mid age girl too . It’s never too late to sober up!