I need help
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Mpls, MN
Posts: 5
I need help
I can't seem to make it through the day right now.
I have reduced my need to a fraction, and I can feel the battle playing out in my head and i continue to lose. My problem time of the day is around noon. I end up home alone and have no safety net except for the notes I wrote to myself, which seem to stay in my pocket when I need to read them most. I told my mother to write me a note to keep me strong, but I failed even with it today. I see progress, for example I am not using marijuana as early as 8 in the morning anymore and I am trying to build on that, also the money I have spent on it has dropped a lot. But still I am in a mindframe of need, that I know I do not need. I have effectively avoided alcohol even working in the liquor store, but I feel like marijuana is too rewarding and I never learned how to moderate something that makes me think I feel good.
I am 21, I have used for nearly 3 years. I haven't gone a week without it in a long time. Last time was last summer on trip to China.
My schoolwork has suffered and my motivation is low.
I feel like I continue to smoke marijuana to dull the pain or eliminate my short term memory of what I have been doing to myself for a long while now.
Any Suggestions to get the ball rolling and to help get through the first week (s) Would help tremendously.
Your responses are powerful to me, I read one a few days ago and for once in a long while I no longer felt alone in my struggle.
Thanks so much
Dave -- trying to get right in MPLS
I have reduced my need to a fraction, and I can feel the battle playing out in my head and i continue to lose. My problem time of the day is around noon. I end up home alone and have no safety net except for the notes I wrote to myself, which seem to stay in my pocket when I need to read them most. I told my mother to write me a note to keep me strong, but I failed even with it today. I see progress, for example I am not using marijuana as early as 8 in the morning anymore and I am trying to build on that, also the money I have spent on it has dropped a lot. But still I am in a mindframe of need, that I know I do not need. I have effectively avoided alcohol even working in the liquor store, but I feel like marijuana is too rewarding and I never learned how to moderate something that makes me think I feel good.
I am 21, I have used for nearly 3 years. I haven't gone a week without it in a long time. Last time was last summer on trip to China.
My schoolwork has suffered and my motivation is low.
I feel like I continue to smoke marijuana to dull the pain or eliminate my short term memory of what I have been doing to myself for a long while now.
Any Suggestions to get the ball rolling and to help get through the first week (s) Would help tremendously.
Your responses are powerful to me, I read one a few days ago and for once in a long while I no longer felt alone in my struggle.
Thanks so much
Dave -- trying to get right in MPLS
Member
Join Date: May 2003
Location: El Paso, Tx
Posts: 5,862
There's a great program NA, Narcotics Anonymous, you'd be amazed at how much help and support you can get. I couldn't quit alone, most can't, with support and understanding from people like you it can be done. BTW, welcome to SR!
Learning To Let It Be
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: New York
Posts: 156
Chy had a great suggestion. Come to NA. Before coming to NA, I could not stop at all. Even if I did, I always returned to getting high. Only through the NA program have I been able to get and stay clean and turn my life around.
'One life you go to do what you should.'
'One life you go to do what you should.'
In Memory Of
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: Connecticut.
Posts: 3,736
hey Dave!
Welcome to SR !I know pot is a hard to give up because the disease tells us its harmless,but we all know its not.Why not give NA a try,plenty there like yourself wanting to stay clean.maybe you could find a therapist who you can talk things over with.The important thing for me is to be honest with myself,I have to make a choice everyday,am I going to move toward a drug or away from one,with help and support I have chosen to move away,you can too.I wish you the best! Bless, Trish 
We all need each other.
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: The road of happy destiny.
Posts: 2,294
Hey Dave--Welcome to SR! I smoked pot for about 16 years. For the last six years, I NEVER went more than a day without. And I tried to kid myself that there wasn't a problem I KNEW I had a problem with alcohol, but pot seemed so harmless. I have now been clean and sober for almost nine months. An amazing feat. I could not have done it without going to treatment and AA. It is okay to need help. It is okay to ask for help. Keep coming back, and we'll be here for you.
Hugs--
Hugs--
Member
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Boston, MA
Posts: 398
Dave,
There was no way I could do it alone. I tried (including writing myself notes), but nothing worked until I worked the program (really did the 12 Steps thoroughly) and went to meetings regularily.
I can happen. I'm on month three now. It's like a miracle, and I hope to remain sober, too.
ChrisMan
There was no way I could do it alone. I tried (including writing myself notes), but nothing worked until I worked the program (really did the 12 Steps thoroughly) and went to meetings regularily.
I can happen. I'm on month three now. It's like a miracle, and I hope to remain sober, too.
ChrisMan
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Mpls, MN
Posts: 5
Your Words are very Helpful
I have set a goal to be sober until the traditional Family race, and beyond that. A Thanksgiving day 5K in downtown Minneapolis. Thanks for all the ideas and suggestions please keep them coming.
Thanks so much
Dave
Thanks so much
Dave
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Mpls, MN
Posts: 5
I'll be back daily
The support here is so strong an organization that helps people in this way should never be forgotten. wrking on a full recovery and hopefully I can help others do the same when that day comes.
You've helped me so much already
Dave
You've helped me so much already
Dave
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