FindingMyNext

What does "dry drunk" mean?

Thanks

Mummyto2

Dry Drunk Syndrome is a condition where an alcoholic retains mental and behavioral traits associated with drunkenness even when he or she is not drinking alcohol. Surely, one would think that the “dry” state is a critical objective for alcoholism treatment regimen

Mummyto2

Found that for you on google

PhoenixJ

To me it means this....( a joke of sorts)

Q: What do you get when an angry, childish drunk sobers up?
A: An angry, childish person.

Giving up booze does not solve the problems that are still there- that were put on hold from drinking. Sobriety gives a person the ability to deal with life by hard work and gain self respect. It does not solve any problems- that takes effort.

FindingMyNext

Thank you, Phoenix. That makes a lot of sense. And the "joke of sorts" was the best explanation; there is always big truth behind jokes, no?

I'd never heard that term before SR. I like it. It is interesting to think about, particularly in working through recovery...

Thx!

Berrybean

No. It's not a popular them on SR. It's like the word 'fat'. Best only used in words or writing if talking about your own experiences. I suspect that it's used more freely in the Friends and Family area.

I was a dry drunk for a little while. Not good. How people remain that way for years without killing themselves or others is a mystery to me. As is how people think that working on recovery would be harder work than they can manage. I've never known anything as exhausting as being sober but without some recovery work in place.

BB

August252015

I consider it a condemnation or at least a big negative when describing someone who doesn't drink. My mom was a dry drunk at many points during her journey to sobriety- and it's just like people said, someone not drinking, generally considering that to be "enough" (esp "enough" to satisfy those pesky people so sensitive about their drinking - *sarcasm*), and who continues to display the alcoholic mindset, behaviors, and all that goes with (or much that goes along with) being an active alcoholic.

BB is right, it doesn't get used a lot around SR because it is indeed a charged term. A dry drunk is the exact opposite of what I want to be in sobriety. I would also connect the term to "emotional sobriety" - something I think of continually in my daily sober life. It precedes physical sobriety for me, as I would not have the latter if I did not work to maintain a balance of the former.

I want so much more for myself (and by extension, my loved ones and pretty much everyone who comes into contact with me to experience from me) than just not drinking. And indeed, IME, there is so, so SO much more to find with this mindset.

FindingMyNext

I apologize, BB-- I didn't know it was an offensive term. In my earlier post (which I didn't articulate well), I just meant to say that it could be useful when self-reflecting on choices and behaviors.
Example: About a week after I had taken my last drink, my SO and I got into a big fight, and I was mortified to realize I was acting exactly as I did when I was drunk. I was childish, loud, unfair, with all the old layers of anger. I knew I had a lot of work to do to get beneath those layers.

In other words, seeing oneself act like a "dry drunk" might indicate where to focus recovery work.

Maybe we're saying the same thing.

FindingMyNext

Thank you, August. That makes good sense.

tomsteve

ANY term is going to offend someone. people even get offended with the term alcoholic.
if i find it offensive, i have a problem.
ive been an alcoholic on a dry drunk. wasnt fun.
glad there was a solution.

lynnmarie123

Don't mix up "dry drunk" with PAWS.
PAWS was very hard on me for a year. I had episodes of unexplained emotions. Sometimes I was just looking for reasons to be angry, childish and unfair.
My brain was damaged and needed to heal. Thankfully, it passed.

Berrybean

Yes. It's not offensive in the way you referred to it, i.e. the meaning of the term, or indeed when thinking or talking of ourselves of our own recovery. I just meant that it wouldn't be a word best used to refer to someone else as. Lol.

And I know just what you mean about acting out in same old ways despite being sober. That was my experience as well before deciding that maybe I too needed to do some work on my recovery.

Aellyce

I would maybe describe it as a person with alcoholism history who quit drinking, but retains a low level of awareness and responsibility regarding their motives, emotional and behavioral tendencies. I personally don't find the term helpful though as it can easily be used in a superficial and condemning manner. For example, sober people can feel unhappy, desperate, or out of balance in certain periods, due to struggling with conditions and life circumstances that are not easy to change. I don't think it necessarily means that they have not done or stopped doing "recovery work". Also, I don't find it useful to think or suggest that whatever we struggle with in the rest of our sober life is related to our past addiction or addictive tendencies, or recovery even. It can easily cause further denial and displacement of true, ongoing problems. Just my opinion.

JamesfrmEngland

A made-up phrase that describes something that doesn't exist.

FindingMyNext

This was very reassuring to me, Lynnmarie123. I am steadier than I have been in years... until I'm really, really not. This is a great reminder to be patient and give it time.