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A question that has probably been asked a million times before....

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A question that has probably been asked a million times before....

Old 06-19-2017, 07:40 AM
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A question that has probably been asked a million times before....

I am on Day 266 of my very first sobriety.

I have thought about just 'having one or two beers' occasionally.

I had a family holiday at the start of May.... All Inclusive. I have managed Christmas, New Year, Birthday and family get togethers and passed all the tests.

Can I moderate myself to the 'occasional beer or two'?
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Old 06-19-2017, 07:48 AM
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I could not.... AT ALL. @ one time when I drank like a "normal person" I could. When I crossed the line between normal and an alcoholic - no way.
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Old 06-19-2017, 07:49 AM
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For me - the gamble isn't worth it. I'm almost two months sober now. If I could stick to one or two drinks, I wouldn't be here browsing the forums, writing comments, posting threads... etc. I keep myself involved for a reason.
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Old 06-19-2017, 07:50 AM
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I am by far no expert on being sober and I do not know what your drinking history is.
If I was able to link 266 sober days together I would protect them with your life.
I have never been able to control my drinking when I go back and try. It always ends up me being a passing out drunk.

What do you have to gain by drinking verses what do you have to lose?

Just my humble opinion.
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Old 06-19-2017, 07:51 AM
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Moderation never worked for me. I would start out being able to control how much a drank...thought I was "cured" but before long, I was right back where I started and drinking more.

It's easy to start thinking that we can drink again after we've been sober for a while. BTDT... Don't do it! You will regret it in a big way!
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Old 06-19-2017, 07:57 AM
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Originally Posted by ColemanReese View Post
I am on Day 266 of my very first sobriety.

I have thought about just 'having one or two beers' occasionally.

I had a family holiday at the start of May.... All Inclusive. I have managed Christmas, New Year, Birthday and family get togethers and passed all the tests.

Can I moderate myself to the 'occasional beer or two'?
I guess my question is after 266 days, why would you want to? is your life horrible now that you are sober? I'm not being sarcastic, I'm being serious.

I'm not a hardcore when it comes to people's desire to moderate. You may be one of those very rare individuals that can, but I'd side with statistics on this one. More than likely it would just be a matter of time before you'd be back to square one, and that's not worth it at all.
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Old 06-19-2017, 07:57 AM
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I couldn't, and it wasn't for lack of trying. I managed many periods of abstinence. Every time I went back to it whatever led me to stop again was always much worse than the prior time.

Even the last time, I was days shy of 18 months and had a few beers. I was back out there for a total of 19 months. I was even at a point where I could drink 5 to 8 times with barely an issue (for me anyway) but I just never knew what was going to happen every time I drank.

I would give back every single sip I took in that 19 months out if I could have seen what was coming.

Is that a risk you're willing to take?
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Old 06-19-2017, 07:59 AM
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I dont see anyone here on this forum supporting "moderation". Its not what we do. Personally, I tried to moderate and that "trying" resulted in blackouts, massive hangovers and complete disaster. That's my story. It may not be yours.

Do you remember why you quit drinking?
Is there a reason to try to go back to it?
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Old 06-19-2017, 08:05 AM
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After 10,863 days of not drinking, I started to think maybe I'd made a mistake or that enough time had gone by and so I thought I could drink on occasion again and moderate if I was careful about it.

It did not work. It was like voluntarily returning to hell and it took over 4 years of trying to get sober to finally be able to get out again.
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Old 06-19-2017, 08:07 AM
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Originally Posted by ColemanReese View Post
My main reason for my sobriety is my lovely wife who has stuck with me through thick and thin. I realised that I have had more of a relationship with the bottom of a glass this millennium than my wife.
What does your wife say when you ask her this question?
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Old 06-19-2017, 08:08 AM
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Can I moderate myself to the 'occasional beer or two'?

you can answer that yourself by looking at your past.
like this:

Checking in to let you all know I have proudly completed my first full month of sobrietyhaving drank heavily for most of this millennium.


or this
Drank heavily (mainly light beers) since the mid 90s.

or this

Drank since I was around early to mid twenties I guess. Quite heavily over the past 15+ years.


want someone else to start payin more attention to your wife than you did again?
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Old 06-19-2017, 08:10 AM
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LadyBlue0527

I love this quote Thank you for it.

Sometimes easier said than done, but the happiest and most content I am in sobriety is when I'm fully accepting of the fact that there is no circumstance under which I can drink.
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Old 06-19-2017, 08:14 AM
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I could never moderate my drinking. If you've got 266 days sober, why throw it away?

Congrats on your sober time!
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Old 06-19-2017, 08:17 AM
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I might be able to have one. But the next time I would have 2 because 1 was ok. Then a friend would offer me a shot with my 2 and and and and and and and and and and. Back to square 1.
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Old 06-19-2017, 08:25 AM
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Moderation doesn't work for alcoholics and what I see from my years here at SR is that when people relapse after being in recovery for awhile, it is much harder than it was originally. If you tried moderating, I would expect that the obsessive thoughts would return immediately.
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Old 06-19-2017, 08:26 AM
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Originally Posted by Madbird View Post
After 10,863 days of not drinking, I started to think maybe I'd made a mistake or that enough time had gone by and so I thought I could drink on occasion again and moderate if I was careful about it.

It did not work. It was like voluntarily returning to hell and it took over 4 years of trying to get sober to finally be able to get out again.
If this reply doesn't do it, nothing will!! Thank you so much Madbird!!!!
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Old 06-19-2017, 08:33 AM
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I was 10 months sober when I went on vacation and decided a couple of drinks on vacay wouldn't hurt......that was 5 years ago and I've been wanting to quit ever since
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Old 06-19-2017, 08:35 AM
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I have tried many times to drink in moderation but it has never worked to me , I would start with 1 or 2 and end with passing out .
Don't throw away 266 days sober .
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Old 06-19-2017, 08:38 AM
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back in October you said:

My main reason for my sobriety is my lovely wife who has stuck with me through thick and thin. I realised that I have had more of a relationship with the bottom of a glass this millennium than my wife.

has that changed? is it worth it?
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Old 06-19-2017, 08:49 AM
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Do you really want to drink just one or two?I can't see the point. One or two would have me feeling worse than none at all.
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