Day one
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Join Date: Oct 2014
Posts: 699
Yes I'll re-read everything
Pretty much from the start of this relapse
It is a gold mine of info
I'm sober now, and throughout the rest of my work day
Will post after work
The real risk time is between 4 and 8pm
That is when the AV goes into overdrive
I've got my sword and shield ready to defend myself at all costs
Pretty much from the start of this relapse
It is a gold mine of info
I'm sober now, and throughout the rest of my work day
Will post after work
The real risk time is between 4 and 8pm
That is when the AV goes into overdrive
I've got my sword and shield ready to defend myself at all costs
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2014
Posts: 699
I collect my daughter from school
She stays with me until 7pm
Then I have band practice
This has not been enough in the past few weeks to stop me drinking
I have to accept that and tool myself up to fight the AV head on
She stays with me until 7pm
Then I have band practice
This has not been enough in the past few weeks to stop me drinking
I have to accept that and tool myself up to fight the AV head on
Stewy the only thing I can say is that I too have been on the binge relapse train for over a year now. I'm now 24 days sober so still very much a newbie at sobriety. The thing that started happening to me was each time without fail the withdrawal got more severe. I had undoubtedly underestimated the disease of alcoholism and how it truly is progressive. I spent a week at least in utter fear and minutes seemed like hours. Digging deeper than I ever had before was the only thing I had left. Like you (I'm guessing) I felt I simply could not seek professional help as I'm terrified of losing my kids so I roughed it out under close supervision of my partner. Risky? Yes. Dangerous? Maybe. It has to be worth every last ounce of will and effort Stewy we are saving our lives and providing a future for our kids. Please dig deep. Please get your head on the pillow each night sober. Please go to the docs if your symptoms worsen.
Stay in touch we are all praying you turn the corner friend ❤❤❤
Stay in touch we are all praying you turn the corner friend ❤❤❤
What exactly is the "sword and shield" that you plan on using at 4pm? What will you do differently today that you didn't do yesterday or other day 1s that you have started over the past several weeks?
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Join Date: Oct 2014
Posts: 699
It starts with a voice that says go and buy beers
Then thoughts follow about me sitting and drinking the beers and that it will be nice to do that
I've been having them for the last half an hour
I'm dismissing the thoughts and I will continue to do this
The sword and shield is a reference to me defending myself mentally
Fending off the stupidity of the thoughts
I'm also getting up and moving about when the thoughts come- distracting myself
Then thoughts follow about me sitting and drinking the beers and that it will be nice to do that
I've been having them for the last half an hour
I'm dismissing the thoughts and I will continue to do this
The sword and shield is a reference to me defending myself mentally
Fending off the stupidity of the thoughts
I'm also getting up and moving about when the thoughts come- distracting myself
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2014
Posts: 699
Sometimes yes, other times no
I've been fine with that for ages but the last 8 weeks have been awful
It's harder this second time around
Need to dig my feet in though
I'll be good with a few day under my belt
I've been fine with that for ages but the last 8 weeks have been awful
It's harder this second time around
Need to dig my feet in though
I'll be good with a few day under my belt
Do your band members know that you're adamant about your recovery?
Stewy - Rooting for you here too. You can do this. Maybe sit down and make a plan when you are sitting with your daughter. She sits and does homework and you can too. You know where the links are. You've got this!
how about instead of BAND practice. you attend SOBER practice? like an AA meeting? until YOU do things different, you'll get the same results, Stewy. and i'd HATE to see a post in a few hours about you giving in to drinking again.
what i am NOT "hearing" in your posts is the resolute commitment to NOT drinking again EVER. the way you shut down the addict voice is with a strong resounding NO, each and ever time. you don't argue, or debate, or in any way let the thoughts linger. you stand firmly by your decision to NOT drink, under any circumstances, no matter what.
and then you go about "proving" that out thru determined ACTION.
whatever it takes.
every day ask yourself two questions:
What am i WILLING to do for my recovery today?
What am i GOING TO DO for my recovery today?
willingness + action is the key.
what i am NOT "hearing" in your posts is the resolute commitment to NOT drinking again EVER. the way you shut down the addict voice is with a strong resounding NO, each and ever time. you don't argue, or debate, or in any way let the thoughts linger. you stand firmly by your decision to NOT drink, under any circumstances, no matter what.
and then you go about "proving" that out thru determined ACTION.
whatever it takes.
every day ask yourself two questions:
What am i WILLING to do for my recovery today?
What am i GOING TO DO for my recovery today?
willingness + action is the key.
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