Nikkabean326

Not sure if it's not having a drink for the past 4 1/2ish days, but I've been having a little trouble falling asleep. I wasn't a big drinker Monday to Wednesday to begin with, but for some reason I can't shut my brain off. I just keep planning, thinking, reliving.. it really is all good things I'm thinking about when I can't sleep, but it's not so good for me in the morning.

I'm taking the advice of many people here and I'm picking up activities that I used to do and loved, or even starting new ones. I started crocheting a blanket in January and I'm not even half way done. I'm also going to begin a new project (summer shawl). Heading to the store for supplies after work. I've got a ridiculous amount of books on my shelves that have yet to be read and I spoke with my BF about starting up geocaching again.

We just got the news that my BF has actually been approved to attend college for 2 years to get a degree in Video Production. He lost his job because jobs were being outsourced to another country, there was a lawsuit, the DOL jumped in and here we are. He's also able to collect unemployment for those full 2 years. It's pretty incredible and we feel very lucky to be in this position. So - with the news comes celebrations. Tonight we plan on going out to our favorite noodle bar. I won't drink. It's going to feel strange because celebrations are prime-time drinking opportunities.

How do you guys handle people asking you if you'd like to drink? This summer at work we're most likely having a company cookout where drinks will be had. It's a small group of us, so it's not like I can slink away and avoid alcohol. It's almost expected of me to partake in it. I want to go to the parties just because it's good team building, in my opinion, but I won't drink. Do you mention that you're quitting drinking, or just that you're trying to drink less?

I'm going to the BF's parents house tomorrow for a bonfire and that's also prime drinking opportunity. His parents are pretty big drinkers, actually. My BF spoke to his mom last night and when asked what kind of wine I wanted, he just simply said that we're both trying to lose weight so we probably won't drink.

Anyhow - I hope you all are doing well. I really enjoy being here and I'm making an effort to write each day. I want to keep my recovery at the forefront of my mind and this helps me do it.

doggonecarl

"No, thanks."

BrendaChenowyth

I am not sure, because I am not a social person.. I just don't find myself in social situations where not drinking would be "weird".

Everyone says "nobody cares" whether you drink or not, but you look young, and from what you've said.. maybe I'm being presumptuous.. Is it a young crowd where everyone is pounding shots together as a group (WOOHOO! LET'S GET MESSED UP!) That kind of thing? Or dinner with family and friends and some people drink and some people don't?

If it's the former, the woohoo let's get messed up crowd, you don't go.
If it's the latter, you go, say no thank you to drinks, chat with people, don't stay long. Personally.

BrendaChenowyth

I have been having great trouble sleeping as well, like you, just going over and over things in my mind.. thinking about how I could have acted different or said something different in situations that happened last year. I need to work on that.

CreativeThinker

Having 4.5 days of sobriety and being in situations where there will be a lot of drinking is tricky. If it were me, I would either avoid such outings until I had some substantial sobriety, or ensure that I had a solid plan on what to do if I felt that I would cave.

Ruby2

I went to pick up my son at his friend's house and was visiting with the mom. She offered"Would you like a glass of wine?" I turned to her, smiled, and said "I'd actually LOVE a diet Coke right now." And that was that. We continued our visit, chatting and drinking diet cokes. No discussion of "I don't drink" or why I don't drink. Or apologies for not taking a glass of wine.

Just because someone offers, doesn't mean you have to take it. I had been getting drunk for so long that I had totally forgotten that consuming alcohol is a choice, not a mandate.

Soberwolf

No thanks i don't drink if asked i just reiterate

thomas11

Sobriety, quitting drinking, recovery or what ever you want to call it is a wholesale lifestyle change. It is not simply a "tweak" in your daily routine. You will find this out in time. Its a pretty major decision and should be treated as such.

Anna

I say, 'No, thanks'. Remember you do not owe anyone an explanation as to whether you drink alcohol or not.

It sounds like you're planning a lot of activities where alcohol will be available. I tried that and failed. So, I decided to stay away from any place where alcohol was being served for many months. That decision saved me.

Serper2014

So you might look at my Sobriety date and be like OH he doesn't even have a week. Well, that may be true, BUT ... I've only drank in front of other people twice in 2 years, with the most recent being Jan of 2016. Both of those times I drank alone and THEN decided to go to a party...So I learned how to say "No" to drink offers a long time ago. It was definitely difficult at first... remember you don't owe anyone an explanation. I found the easiest way to say no was to immediately say "No I don't drink" with a tone that has such confidence that "it's not even an option" I would say 95% of the time people just say "oh ok" If you are pressed further to drink just say "ugh no it makes me so sick" "yeah even one" etc... I think it's more about your tone then what you actually say.