Failure again
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Join Date: Aug 2016
Location: UK
Posts: 844
Failure again
Well I joined this forum on 2nd August 2016. I have desperately tried to stop drinking but get a few days or a couple of weeks (at best) and I'm back on the wine.
I managed 6 days sober from new year then caved in last weekend and been drinking since. At work yesterday I'm positive I was still drunk from necking 3 bottles of wine the previous day and I didn't start work till 1pm. I started to get withdrawals towards evening shaking so bad I couldn't write. How embarrassing but it still didn't stop me from calling on the way home for another couple of bottles.
Back on day 1 again. I felt great after a few days sober last week then like a fool drank Saturday evening. I'm joining the weekend forum and need to post in the January class.
I'm 50 this year and the drinking is getting worse. I need to stay stopped am seriously getting concerned about my health and what I'm doing to it. We don't know what is going on inside our bodies sometimes until it's too late 😔
I managed 6 days sober from new year then caved in last weekend and been drinking since. At work yesterday I'm positive I was still drunk from necking 3 bottles of wine the previous day and I didn't start work till 1pm. I started to get withdrawals towards evening shaking so bad I couldn't write. How embarrassing but it still didn't stop me from calling on the way home for another couple of bottles.
Back on day 1 again. I felt great after a few days sober last week then like a fool drank Saturday evening. I'm joining the weekend forum and need to post in the January class.
I'm 50 this year and the drinking is getting worse. I need to stay stopped am seriously getting concerned about my health and what I'm doing to it. We don't know what is going on inside our bodies sometimes until it's too late 😔
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Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 25,373
True. Those withdrawals keep getting worse too.
Have you read the Kindling thing?
Link:
https://pubs.niaaa.nih.gov/publicati...22-1/25-34.pdf
Have you read the Kindling thing?
Link:
https://pubs.niaaa.nih.gov/publicati...22-1/25-34.pdf
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Join Date: Aug 2016
Location: UK
Posts: 844
Originally Posted by biminiblue 
True. Those withdrawals keep getting worse too.
Have you read the Kindling thing?
Link:
https://pubs.niaaa.nih.gov/publicati...22-1/25-34.pdf
Have you read the Kindling thing?
Link:
https://pubs.niaaa.nih.gov/publicati...22-1/25-34.pdf
Ive not read it but I will thanks
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Join Date: Aug 2016
Location: UK
Posts: 844
Originally Posted by doggonecarl
What's been prompting the return to drinking?
He will only have a drink Saturday and possibly Sunday but not much.
I know I can never drink again I'm just fooling myself
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Join Date: Jul 2016
Location: Wareham, Mass
Posts: 7,067
I think the hardest thing for us to let go of is the belief and hope that we can drink like normal people.
But....once we do let go of it, life becomes simpler and better.
You do not have to be defined by drinking. Peace.
But....once we do let go of it, life becomes simpler and better.
You do not have to be defined by drinking. Peace.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2017
Posts: 110
always the hope the next time will be different, when the evidence shows us the other hundreds of times it wasn't.But we still believe this time is going to be different. Especially when you have a period of time sober, its like we think its al gone away as we haven't had anything. I think what people are saying is true and I need to fully believe it an accept 'we are alcoholics, and we will never drink like other people,we cannot drink'. After all the hell we have all been through I really am believing the people that are saying once we accept it, it gets easier and better. The fight to moderate is too damn exhausting anyway isn't it? Have one drink and spend the next however long wondering how you can get another, because one is never enough.Its so tiring, I think to break free we have to accept the truth of it. And the fact we are here, is saying we are either so very nearly at that point and on the right track.
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Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: California
Posts: 13,044
Hi Pinky,
Glad you are back. I learned after way too many Day Ones that I couldn't control my drinking. I would tell myself that I would just have one, that I could moderate, but that never worked. I have been sober a little over a year and life has been much easier.
You can do this, think about what you need to add to your toolbox.
Glad you are back. I learned after way too many Day Ones that I couldn't control my drinking. I would tell myself that I would just have one, that I could moderate, but that never worked. I have been sober a little over a year and life has been much easier.
You can do this, think about what you need to add to your toolbox.
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Join Date: Aug 2016
Location: UK
Posts: 844
Originally Posted by Maudcat
I think the hardest thing for us to let go of is the belief and hope that we can drink like normal people.
But....once we do let go of it, life becomes simpler and better.
You do not have to be defined by drinking. Peace.
But....once we do let go of it, life becomes simpler and better.
You do not have to be defined by drinking. Peace.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2016
Location: UK
Posts: 844
Originally Posted by kel08
always the hope the next time will be different, when the evidence shows us the other hundreds of times it wasn't.But we still believe this time is going to be different. Especially when you have a period of time sober, its like we think its al gone away as we haven't had anything. I think what people are saying is true and I need to fully believe it an accept 'we are alcoholics, and we will never drink like other people,we cannot drink'. After all the hell we have all been through I really am believing the people that are saying once we accept it, it gets easier and better. The fight to moderate is too damn exhausting anyway isn't it? Have one drink and spend the next however long wondering how you can get another, because one is never enough.Its so tiring, I think to break free we have to accept the truth of it. And the fact we are here, is saying we are either so very nearly at that point and on the right track.
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Join Date: Aug 2016
Location: UK
Posts: 844
Originally Posted by Delilah1
Hi Pinky,
Glad you are back. I learned after way too many Day Ones that I couldn't control my drinking. I would tell myself that I would just have one, that I could moderate, but that never worked. I have been sober a little over a year and life has been much easier.
You can do this, think about what you need to add to your toolbox.
Glad you are back. I learned after way too many Day Ones that I couldn't control my drinking. I would tell myself that I would just have one, that I could moderate, but that never worked. I have been sober a little over a year and life has been much easier.
You can do this, think about what you need to add to your toolbox.
Yes I'm fed up of day ones and I know I can't moderate.
Well done on 1 year you must be so proud.
I am thinking about what to add. Maybe write a daily journal. Tried that before and it helped. Thank you
Member
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Midwest
Posts: 8,336
It's hard to stop drinking what you like, if it's still around the house. Any chance your husband would agree to not drink, or at least not drink wine, till you're " over the hump"?
Accepting we can't drink, is tough, especially as wine is every where. I can tell you from my experience of being a wine drinker....4 1/2 years sober, I don't miss it a bit! I'm so much more in control of my health and happiness, sober
Accepting we can't drink, is tough, especially as wine is every where. I can tell you from my experience of being a wine drinker....4 1/2 years sober, I don't miss it a bit! I'm so much more in control of my health and happiness, sober
Member
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: MN
Posts: 8,704
Acceptance makes quitting a little bit easier. Being an alcoholic is a lot of damn work. When we finally break the cycle and accept that our lives our going to change (for the better), I believe it helps us move forward.
Recovering
Join Date: May 2012
Location: UK
Posts: 1,361
Pinky. Whatever happens, stay with us. One of my biggest mistakes was not coming back here after a relapse (or waiting nearly one year). So well done on coming straight back here - you've more sense than me.
Don't give up giving up.
Don't give up giving up.
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Join Date: Aug 2016
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Posts: 844
Originally Posted by Pondlady
It's hard to stop drinking what you like, if it's still around the house. Any chance your husband would agree to not drink, or at least not drink wine, till you're " over the hump"?
Accepting we can't drink, is tough, especially as wine is every where. I can tell you from my experience of being a wine drinker....4 1/2 years sober, I don't miss it a bit! I'm so much more in control of my health and happiness, sober
Accepting we can't drink, is tough, especially as wine is every where. I can tell you from my experience of being a wine drinker....4 1/2 years sober, I don't miss it a bit! I'm so much more in control of my health and happiness, sober
Well done 4 1/2 years ☺
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Join Date: Aug 2016
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Originally Posted by thomas11
Acceptance makes quitting a little bit easier. Being an alcoholic is a lot of damn work. When we finally break the cycle and accept that our lives our going to change (for the better), I believe it helps us move forward.
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