Listening to music is a trigger
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2016
Posts: 30
Listening to music is a trigger
Well this kinda sucks since I am a huge music fan. Does anyone else suffer from this lol? In all seriousness, one thing I LOVED to do when I drank was listen to my favorite bands. MP3s, CD's, vinyl, whatever. It seemed to take me to a different level of emotion when I hear music I love. An escape if you will. Wonder if thats the case for anyone else? Do any of you now separate the two and enjoy it like you used to?
That bell or bike person
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: london
Posts: 4,978
With time i rediscovered my music and enjoy it just as much as at anytime before.
If something is triggery put it to the back of the music pile and maybe at some time in the future youll be able to listen to it ok .
Thats how it was for me .
m
If something is triggery put it to the back of the music pile and maybe at some time in the future youll be able to listen to it ok .
Thats how it was for me .
m
waking down
Join Date: Dec 2013
Posts: 4,641
Loved music drunk, loved music high, love music clean and sober.
I like mecanix's suggestion. I still go to shows and there is no doubt I enjoy the music as much or more than anyone who's drinking or high. I play and perform, and folks tell me I'm much improved without alcohol.
Give it time.
I like mecanix's suggestion. I still go to shows and there is no doubt I enjoy the music as much or more than anyone who's drinking or high. I play and perform, and folks tell me I'm much improved without alcohol.
Give it time.
Reach Out and Touch Faith
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: On a Sailboat
Posts: 3,871
Yes, I did find it triggering as well. What I did, since music is so much a part of my life, was purposefully discover new types of music. I turned on Pandora, typed in "Blues," let the channel play, and now I have an appreciation for Muddy Waters and John Hooker as well as the music I used to associate with drinking. Eventually, you will also form new sober memories of the same music you used to listen to when drunk and those will be more fresh in your head replacing your older thoughts.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Posts: 1,095
Music isn't a trigger for me but I can name a few others.
I love to cook out on the BBQ and one thing I always enjoyed was being at the grill and drinking beer.
Camping. Fishing. Going to the golf course. All these things involved drinking for me.
These things won't be the same sober. Oh well.
I love to cook out on the BBQ and one thing I always enjoyed was being at the grill and drinking beer.
Camping. Fishing. Going to the golf course. All these things involved drinking for me.
These things won't be the same sober. Oh well.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,445
I was lucky that music never triggered me.
Most people find what triggers them in the early days is a temporary thing...maybe give the music a miss or listen to some new music for a while until the old associations are broken?
D
Most people find what triggers them in the early days is a temporary thing...maybe give the music a miss or listen to some new music for a while until the old associations are broken?
D
Member
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: MN
Posts: 8,704
Originally Posted by Dee74 
I was lucky that music never triggered me.
Most people find what triggers them in the early days is a temporary thing...maybe give the music a miss or listen to some new music for a while until the old associations are broken?
D
Most people find what triggers them in the early days is a temporary thing...maybe give the music a miss or listen to some new music for a while until the old associations are broken?
D
sober style
Join Date: May 2016
Location: San Antonio
Posts: 2,388
I still listen to my beloved country drinking songs, Merle Haggard, George Jones, Gary Stewart etc. Luckily it doesn't make me want to drink myself. For one thing, these poor bastards in the songs are always so miserable, haha.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Posts: 425
I'm in the process of listening to every single song that I own. It's a lengthy process but It will be worth it.
I think the trick is to take it head on. When I get to a song that makes me crave. I listen to it on repeat, until the association is broken. Most of the time it only takes a few listens before I can listen to the song again at a later time and not feel an urge. For the most difficult songs (the ones I'd listen to on repeat while drinking) it takes me around 20 listens on repeat to break the association. The brain's plasticity is pretty amazing and it's not as difficult as it sounds to break associations because your memory is much better when you are sober.
I think the trick is to take it head on. When I get to a song that makes me crave. I listen to it on repeat, until the association is broken. Most of the time it only takes a few listens before I can listen to the song again at a later time and not feel an urge. For the most difficult songs (the ones I'd listen to on repeat while drinking) it takes me around 20 listens on repeat to break the association. The brain's plasticity is pretty amazing and it's not as difficult as it sounds to break associations because your memory is much better when you are sober.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2015
Posts: 734
Massive trigger for me with certain Genres - I was massively into the Rave / dance scene for many many years and for the last 13 months have avoided it at all costs, E's were something I did on a regular basis for over 25 years and for me it was dance music they went hand in hand with - lost in the music wasn't in it - I get really anxious if i even hear any of it and don't want to awaken any thoughts of romancing where I used to escape to by listening to it anymore so just stay away from it.
The good news is there's so much other music out there and I've now a new found appreciation of classical music which I'm really enjoying, not stopped listening to music just changed what I listen too, anything associated with nights & partying / drugs etc out I don't need or want to listen to anymore.
The good news is there's so much other music out there and I've now a new found appreciation of classical music which I'm really enjoying, not stopped listening to music just changed what I listen too, anything associated with nights & partying / drugs etc out I don't need or want to listen to anymore.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2016
Posts: 1,025
It s the opposite for me.
Music is a key part of my recovery, writing and recording are now part of my daily routine and I listen to music all day.
In past recovery attempts I saw a lot of things as triggers and music has been one of them so I understand what some of you are saying. This time round I think I finally reached the point that I just want to be sober a lot more than I want to drink, so the triggers have been kind of irrelevant.
I have also gone back to listening to things I used to listen to as a teenager, in a weird way it helped me connect with my true self.
Wish you all music lovers the best with your recoveries!
P
Music is a key part of my recovery, writing and recording are now part of my daily routine and I listen to music all day.
In past recovery attempts I saw a lot of things as triggers and music has been one of them so I understand what some of you are saying. This time round I think I finally reached the point that I just want to be sober a lot more than I want to drink, so the triggers have been kind of irrelevant.
I have also gone back to listening to things I used to listen to as a teenager, in a weird way it helped me connect with my true self.
Wish you all music lovers the best with your recoveries!
P
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 6,902
I went through a phase when I stopped listening to music. It's gradually come back into my life again though. I do find some of my old favourites rankle with me, as the lyrics now seem ridiculous and don't really reflect my values any more. I find it almost embarrassing to listen to some of them and they're a bit of a mirror to my old self, and it can be a bit cringey listening to certain tracks. Others have held true though. Plus, I've found some new ones that speak to me and strengthen me when I need it (David Crowder's American Prodigal album and some lovely old Rosetta Tharpe tracks for a start off).
I remember someone on a speaker tapes saying that we can be inclined to hold onto things from our past as if they are treasures, when in fact they're just dog turds wrapped in shiny paper. I think some (not all) of the music I listened to in my actively alcoholic years could well have come into that category. Especially the ones with lyrics that glorified drinking and other behaviours that to me can become obsessive and compulsive, and helped me to justify and normalise my thinking and actions that were harming me and those I loved. It was a while before I was able to differentiate between the turds and the treasures, so I suppose that's why I needed to kind of back away from music for a while.
I remember someone on a speaker tapes saying that we can be inclined to hold onto things from our past as if they are treasures, when in fact they're just dog turds wrapped in shiny paper. I think some (not all) of the music I listened to in my actively alcoholic years could well have come into that category. Especially the ones with lyrics that glorified drinking and other behaviours that to me can become obsessive and compulsive, and helped me to justify and normalise my thinking and actions that were harming me and those I loved. It was a while before I was able to differentiate between the turds and the treasures, so I suppose that's why I needed to kind of back away from music for a while.
Do your best
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 67,047
If music is triggering for anyone then obviously the suggestion is don't listen, but like others have said I didn't find it triggering I used to DJ but I've loved music since I was in the womb, I was brought up on everything where I came from there were many cultures & races and different types of music & it influenced me to the point I couldn't live in a world without music
I'm not sure if anyone finds recovery songs triggering I remember hearing a song about getting sober by macklemore and it brought tears to my eyes (this was over a year in recovery & I didn't know recovery songs exist ... I do now & I find it awesome) it helped me & made me feel less alone seeing people in the public eye talking about thier addictions and the songs they made while in recovery
So in short if it's triggering obviously don't listen intentionally but I can't lie & say music isn't important to my recovery... because it's important to my life
I'm not sure if anyone finds recovery songs triggering I remember hearing a song about getting sober by macklemore and it brought tears to my eyes (this was over a year in recovery & I didn't know recovery songs exist ... I do now & I find it awesome) it helped me & made me feel less alone seeing people in the public eye talking about thier addictions and the songs they made while in recovery
So in short if it's triggering obviously don't listen intentionally but I can't lie & say music isn't important to my recovery... because it's important to my life
Member
Join Date: Dec 2016
Posts: 83
I have really enjoyed reading this thread and have 'thanked' just about every post as a result.
I loved music from when I was a dot. Listened endlessly to the Beatles when I was 5 and learned how to drop the stylus onto the record. Then, at 15, I started drinking. Not much at first, but I got to hang around with older kids and grown-ups and, most importantly, girls! At this point music and drinking crashed into each other like molecules in a reaction and were fused. By the end of the year, I had added in weed, coke, ecstasy and a few other bits and bobs here and there and my drinking was regular and heavy. RedAndy, I was also near Manchester in the very early 90s as it happens and was subsumed into the excesses of the time.
For years afterwards, music and drinking were welded together. Ironically though, I was a decent guitar player and singer in my late teens but drinking ruined that really. It stayed ruined for about 20 years but, as my drinking has become less heavy and frequent in recent years, green shoots of hope have emerged and I am playing and singing again - just trying to make up for a couple of decades of practice.
Thankfully, in my current abstinence, my playing is getting better and, as an activity it is very uplifting and therapeutic. When I get to playing, singing and composing, I can lose an evening in what seems like seconds without a thought of drinking, which is a very useful tool to have in the kit!
Now, performing completely sober, especially out in bars....I can't pretend to have cracked that yet by any means! But I really want to and I believe I will. but I am starting with some less challenging venues first - coffee shops etc at present.
In terms of listening to music though, I love it - but basically all the music I listen to is what I have found recently without the connotations of the 'good' times.
Dance music creates unease in me - too many nights of mindless oblivion and spiky mornings. A lot of jazz takes me immediately to all night sessions of brandy and coke...and regret....
They are not triggers for me in the sense that they increase my appetite to drink or use drugs. But they bring me unease and that is something to avoid right now. I also find a lot of music to sound vacuous and thin now - like it was written for mindless abandon. Nothing wrong with a bit of that if you can do it healthily but I can't!
Anyway, to paraphrase that ramble...music affects me a great deal and this can be positively or negatively so I choose carefully. Making music is good for me in very many ways and is currently a really important part of my abstinence - got to watch those bar gigs though!
If you don't play an instrument or have ditched one due to your previous drinking, I really recommend having a go as a way to focus the mind and body.
I loved music from when I was a dot. Listened endlessly to the Beatles when I was 5 and learned how to drop the stylus onto the record. Then, at 15, I started drinking. Not much at first, but I got to hang around with older kids and grown-ups and, most importantly, girls! At this point music and drinking crashed into each other like molecules in a reaction and were fused. By the end of the year, I had added in weed, coke, ecstasy and a few other bits and bobs here and there and my drinking was regular and heavy. RedAndy, I was also near Manchester in the very early 90s as it happens and was subsumed into the excesses of the time.
For years afterwards, music and drinking were welded together. Ironically though, I was a decent guitar player and singer in my late teens but drinking ruined that really. It stayed ruined for about 20 years but, as my drinking has become less heavy and frequent in recent years, green shoots of hope have emerged and I am playing and singing again - just trying to make up for a couple of decades of practice.
Thankfully, in my current abstinence, my playing is getting better and, as an activity it is very uplifting and therapeutic. When I get to playing, singing and composing, I can lose an evening in what seems like seconds without a thought of drinking, which is a very useful tool to have in the kit!
Now, performing completely sober, especially out in bars....I can't pretend to have cracked that yet by any means! But I really want to and I believe I will. but I am starting with some less challenging venues first - coffee shops etc at present.
In terms of listening to music though, I love it - but basically all the music I listen to is what I have found recently without the connotations of the 'good' times.
Dance music creates unease in me - too many nights of mindless oblivion and spiky mornings. A lot of jazz takes me immediately to all night sessions of brandy and coke...and regret....
They are not triggers for me in the sense that they increase my appetite to drink or use drugs. But they bring me unease and that is something to avoid right now. I also find a lot of music to sound vacuous and thin now - like it was written for mindless abandon. Nothing wrong with a bit of that if you can do it healthily but I can't!
Anyway, to paraphrase that ramble...music affects me a great deal and this can be positively or negatively so I choose carefully. Making music is good for me in very many ways and is currently a really important part of my abstinence - got to watch those bar gigs though!
If you don't play an instrument or have ditched one due to your previous drinking, I really recommend having a go as a way to focus the mind and body.
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