How do you @ SR practice mindfulness & Stay present
waking down
Join Date: Dec 2013
Posts: 4,641
I noticed some have mentioned MBCT (Mindfulness Based Cognitive Therapy) and DBT (Dialectical Behavior Therapy). I recommend MBSR (Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction), and there is a free website called www.palousemindfulness.com to help you through an 8-week program based on Zinn's Full Catastrophe Living.
There are lots of great books. Lately I've been leaning toward Shambhala publications from folks like Pema Chodron and Mipham Rinpoche. Lawrence Peltz also wrote a book specifically about mindful recovery. The Shambhala folks offer online meditation classes that are worthwhile. The Everyday Life Series parallels weekend Shambhala Training "mini-retreats" that helped me with direct instruction along with the opportunity to talk with other meditators, and of course to meditate for the better part of a couple of days at a time.
As suggested by some above, the Shambhala trainings focus at first on sustained focus on the breath with nonjudgmental observation of the flow of thoughts. Eventually, though, we begin to loosen the tight focus on the breath to cultivate body and sensual awareness. Shambhala practitioners meditate with eyes open, at first with gaze low and to the floor, and with each step raising gaze a little to begin including taking the practice into our daily lives. Time on the cushion remains the foundation, but in the long run, cultivating mindfulness means we meditate throughout the day while walking, playing, working... and being present with each other and the world.
This is where it has begun making a real difference for me. As an addict I have come to realize that much of my suffering has been mostly about being on what Mipham calls "The Me Plan." When I shed my narcissism and my ego, it is much easier to endure challenging emotions such as anxiety, grief, frustration, and impatience. "It is what it is" becomes a mantra, and I am less attached to product and more engaged in the process of living, regardless of the circumstance.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not perfect, and I have my moments, but I am getting better at remembering the instructions I have been taught and thus redirecting my mind when I allow myself to slip and cause myself to suffer, which sometimes negatively affects those around me.
Two instructional books I found particularly helpful are Sakyong Mipham Rinpoche's Turning the Mind Into an Ally and Ruling Your World, two titles that I suspect capture the imagination of any addict.
I guess one thing I would say is that different authors have different things to say about meditation and mindfulness, and for beginners I would not recommend attempting to turn off the chatter because it's not likely going to happen. I've been meditating 20 to 30 minutes a day for years now, and the chatter only becomes silent for maybe ten seconds at a time. Try not to make it a goal to have your mind go silent; you will only become frustrated. Don't expect it to happen, and most importantly, don't beat yourself up when it doesn't. Yes, those moments are magical, but they are not the goal. For me, the goal is to meditate and practice mindfulness in order to live in the world with greater presence so that I am better able to cultivate peace in myself, my relationships, and the world.
And one last warning: In early sobriety my meditation practice was not peaceful and not at all relaxing. Thoughts emerged that I had long buried. Painful memories crawled out of booze-soaked trenches and slapped me in the face. Anxiety in waves sometimes caused me to grip onto my knees like the handlebar on a rollercoaster. But it's been worth it.
There is another form of therapy called ACT (Acceptance & Commitment Therapy) that incorporates mindfulness. For many the greatest challenge is acceptance - acceptance of self and circumstance. When we learn to accept we learn to heal, we learn to forgive (ourselves and others), and we learn to be grateful for this moment...and the next... I have come to accept that my decades of substance abuse has damaged my brain, and I accept that my practice is necessary to help in heal and to learn to live in the world without substances and with contentment, joy, and fearlessness. I'm no yogi and I sure ain't no guru, but in three short years I have progressed from severe substance use disorder, through waves of palpable anxiety and near madness, to a person mostly at peace with myself and where I have landed in life.
We are all capable of enjoying this moment with greater happiness, less suffering, and increased equanimity. But it takes practice. My mind is no longer an accident of circumstance, but rather, something I have begun to sculpt out of the material I have been provided.
There are lots of great books. Lately I've been leaning toward Shambhala publications from folks like Pema Chodron and Mipham Rinpoche. Lawrence Peltz also wrote a book specifically about mindful recovery. The Shambhala folks offer online meditation classes that are worthwhile. The Everyday Life Series parallels weekend Shambhala Training "mini-retreats" that helped me with direct instruction along with the opportunity to talk with other meditators, and of course to meditate for the better part of a couple of days at a time.
As suggested by some above, the Shambhala trainings focus at first on sustained focus on the breath with nonjudgmental observation of the flow of thoughts. Eventually, though, we begin to loosen the tight focus on the breath to cultivate body and sensual awareness. Shambhala practitioners meditate with eyes open, at first with gaze low and to the floor, and with each step raising gaze a little to begin including taking the practice into our daily lives. Time on the cushion remains the foundation, but in the long run, cultivating mindfulness means we meditate throughout the day while walking, playing, working... and being present with each other and the world.
This is where it has begun making a real difference for me. As an addict I have come to realize that much of my suffering has been mostly about being on what Mipham calls "The Me Plan." When I shed my narcissism and my ego, it is much easier to endure challenging emotions such as anxiety, grief, frustration, and impatience. "It is what it is" becomes a mantra, and I am less attached to product and more engaged in the process of living, regardless of the circumstance.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not perfect, and I have my moments, but I am getting better at remembering the instructions I have been taught and thus redirecting my mind when I allow myself to slip and cause myself to suffer, which sometimes negatively affects those around me.
Two instructional books I found particularly helpful are Sakyong Mipham Rinpoche's Turning the Mind Into an Ally and Ruling Your World, two titles that I suspect capture the imagination of any addict.
I guess one thing I would say is that different authors have different things to say about meditation and mindfulness, and for beginners I would not recommend attempting to turn off the chatter because it's not likely going to happen. I've been meditating 20 to 30 minutes a day for years now, and the chatter only becomes silent for maybe ten seconds at a time. Try not to make it a goal to have your mind go silent; you will only become frustrated. Don't expect it to happen, and most importantly, don't beat yourself up when it doesn't. Yes, those moments are magical, but they are not the goal. For me, the goal is to meditate and practice mindfulness in order to live in the world with greater presence so that I am better able to cultivate peace in myself, my relationships, and the world.
And one last warning: In early sobriety my meditation practice was not peaceful and not at all relaxing. Thoughts emerged that I had long buried. Painful memories crawled out of booze-soaked trenches and slapped me in the face. Anxiety in waves sometimes caused me to grip onto my knees like the handlebar on a rollercoaster. But it's been worth it.
There is another form of therapy called ACT (Acceptance & Commitment Therapy) that incorporates mindfulness. For many the greatest challenge is acceptance - acceptance of self and circumstance. When we learn to accept we learn to heal, we learn to forgive (ourselves and others), and we learn to be grateful for this moment...and the next... I have come to accept that my decades of substance abuse has damaged my brain, and I accept that my practice is necessary to help in heal and to learn to live in the world without substances and with contentment, joy, and fearlessness. I'm no yogi and I sure ain't no guru, but in three short years I have progressed from severe substance use disorder, through waves of palpable anxiety and near madness, to a person mostly at peace with myself and where I have landed in life.
We are all capable of enjoying this moment with greater happiness, less suffering, and increased equanimity. But it takes practice. My mind is no longer an accident of circumstance, but rather, something I have begun to sculpt out of the material I have been provided.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Welshman living in Cork, Ireland
Posts: 737
I meditate first thing every morning.
My meditation centres around breathing. Sit in a hard back chair and try to just focus on breathing.
I sit upright with my hands on my knees, and both feet flat on the floor.
Close my eyes.
Feel the support of the ground on my feet.
Feel the support of the seat on my butt.
Then I focus on breathing.
"I'm breathing in......... my lungs are expanding.
Hold my breath a while.
Breath out....... my shoulders slump."
I repeat this a few times then start to notice my body. I scan slowly from head to toe.
Am I tense?
Am I sore?
Am I relaxed?
I just notice these things non judgmentally. I don't try to change anything just gently and "mindfully" being aware.
Thoughts invariably come and go. So I just notice them, acknowledge them and let them pass. I liken it to standing near a roadside and watching the traffic (my thoughts) go by. I don't judge the traffic, I don't step out in front of it. Don't wave to a car I recognise. Just acknowledge the traffic and let them pass.
If the traffic gets too heavy I return to focusing on my breathing. Not angry that the traffic was too heavy. Just gentle acceptance. Let the traffic slow down and the road quieten slowly.
I find it a great grounding start to the day.
A good tip someone shared with me is to set an alarm (phone or watch) to go off every couple of hours or so as a reminder to be mindful and to check in with your feelings and emotions for a couple of minutes.
Good thread Mr Wolf
My meditation centres around breathing. Sit in a hard back chair and try to just focus on breathing.
I sit upright with my hands on my knees, and both feet flat on the floor.
Close my eyes.
Feel the support of the ground on my feet.
Feel the support of the seat on my butt.
Then I focus on breathing.
"I'm breathing in......... my lungs are expanding.
Hold my breath a while.
Breath out....... my shoulders slump."
I repeat this a few times then start to notice my body. I scan slowly from head to toe.
Am I tense?
Am I sore?
Am I relaxed?
I just notice these things non judgmentally. I don't try to change anything just gently and "mindfully" being aware.
Thoughts invariably come and go. So I just notice them, acknowledge them and let them pass. I liken it to standing near a roadside and watching the traffic (my thoughts) go by. I don't judge the traffic, I don't step out in front of it. Don't wave to a car I recognise. Just acknowledge the traffic and let them pass.
If the traffic gets too heavy I return to focusing on my breathing. Not angry that the traffic was too heavy. Just gentle acceptance. Let the traffic slow down and the road quieten slowly.
I find it a great grounding start to the day.
A good tip someone shared with me is to set an alarm (phone or watch) to go off every couple of hours or so as a reminder to be mindful and to check in with your feelings and emotions for a couple of minutes.
Good thread Mr Wolf
Guest
Join Date: Mar 2016
Posts: 936
I'm still very new to mindfulness, but I've found that if I just stop and pay attention and be factual and not emotional, that helps me be mindful.
I recently decreased my SSRI meds and although I've done this before (under doctor's care) this time was much easier due to mindfulness. If I had a day where I was feeling really anxious, I just said to myself "this is just a side effect of the med decrease" and I was able to re-center myself.
Self-awareness, and not getting anxious over the self-awareness, is key for me. I somehow noticed that sometimes I clench my fingers or toes. I now check in with my body now and then to see if I'm doing this, and then relax them if I am. That's a mindfulness technique called "body scan".
Knowing to PAUSE instead of feeding INTO the anxiety really helps me.
I also try to practice having self-awareness of when my mind is in gerbil on a wheel mode. It happens whenever I'm thinking about the past, or worrying about the future. Practicing self-awareness of this helps me a lot.
I also find that coloring in coloring books for adults helps with mindfulness. The depressed/anxious thoughts still come into my mind, but I am focuses on coloring so they just sort of are there in the background and float away. Carl Jung actually was the one who discovered that creating and coloring mandalas had psychological benefits.
Learning to separate my mind from myself so to speak has been so important. I learned this in AA. It's hard to explain but I cannot stress enough how much this has helped me. It all started with self-awareness of my thoughts which were usually related to depression or anxiety and not the present moment.
Speaking from experience, doing the steps the last way I was taught helped me to recover. But mindfulness was integrated in them without realizing it. Alcoholism is a disease that centers in the mind. We all could benefit from mindfulness.
It is a common misconception that mindfulness just means meditation. But there are many aspects of mindfulness other than just meditation.
I tried to read Eckart Tolle books but have trouble understanding them. My former sponsor told me to try again but just read a couple of pages at a time to process it. I also heard someone else say that you process his book unconsciously.
Lastly, if you feel that mindfulness and meditation is against your religion, try Western type mindfulness and meditation which is from the Jon Kabat Zinn school of thought. It's scientific and not Buddhist. Also, "positive psychology" is big into mindfulness and meditation.
I recently decreased my SSRI meds and although I've done this before (under doctor's care) this time was much easier due to mindfulness. If I had a day where I was feeling really anxious, I just said to myself "this is just a side effect of the med decrease" and I was able to re-center myself.
Self-awareness, and not getting anxious over the self-awareness, is key for me. I somehow noticed that sometimes I clench my fingers or toes. I now check in with my body now and then to see if I'm doing this, and then relax them if I am. That's a mindfulness technique called "body scan".
Knowing to PAUSE instead of feeding INTO the anxiety really helps me.
I also try to practice having self-awareness of when my mind is in gerbil on a wheel mode. It happens whenever I'm thinking about the past, or worrying about the future. Practicing self-awareness of this helps me a lot.
I also find that coloring in coloring books for adults helps with mindfulness. The depressed/anxious thoughts still come into my mind, but I am focuses on coloring so they just sort of are there in the background and float away. Carl Jung actually was the one who discovered that creating and coloring mandalas had psychological benefits.
Learning to separate my mind from myself so to speak has been so important. I learned this in AA. It's hard to explain but I cannot stress enough how much this has helped me. It all started with self-awareness of my thoughts which were usually related to depression or anxiety and not the present moment.
Speaking from experience, doing the steps the last way I was taught helped me to recover. But mindfulness was integrated in them without realizing it. Alcoholism is a disease that centers in the mind. We all could benefit from mindfulness.
It is a common misconception that mindfulness just means meditation. But there are many aspects of mindfulness other than just meditation.
I tried to read Eckart Tolle books but have trouble understanding them. My former sponsor told me to try again but just read a couple of pages at a time to process it. I also heard someone else say that you process his book unconsciously.
Lastly, if you feel that mindfulness and meditation is against your religion, try Western type mindfulness and meditation which is from the Jon Kabat Zinn school of thought. It's scientific and not Buddhist. Also, "positive psychology" is big into mindfulness and meditation.
All is Change
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Australia
Posts: 1,284
For me mindfulness starts with maintaing focus.
Keeping my awareness fixed on one thing for as long as I can.
That thing I focus on is my breath as it happens to be at any time. In time that focus point can narrow down to the nose. Just being aware of the breath going in and and the breath going out. Warm cold hard soft fast slow. It doesn't matter. What matters is maintaining awareness and bringing it back when it wanders.
Somehow while doing that my mind clears.
My breath is with me wherever I am and it's a kind of truth that's always with me so I think that while studying my breath I'm having a relationship with deeper truths.
Keeping my awareness fixed on one thing for as long as I can.
That thing I focus on is my breath as it happens to be at any time. In time that focus point can narrow down to the nose. Just being aware of the breath going in and and the breath going out. Warm cold hard soft fast slow. It doesn't matter. What matters is maintaining awareness and bringing it back when it wanders.
Somehow while doing that my mind clears.
My breath is with me wherever I am and it's a kind of truth that's always with me so I think that while studying my breath I'm having a relationship with deeper truths.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2016
Posts: 980
I think mindfulness is SOOO important. I try to read devotionals and get centered every morning. The timer on the phone every few hours is great too.
I also do EFT. It seems odd, but it does help. Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) - Emotional Health
I also try to do YouTube binaural beats. Google binaural beats addiction or stress or anxiety or whatever. I'll put the headphones in @ night and fall asleep to them.
In looking back @ relapses that I've had, every single time has been due to resorting back to my state of getting on the gerbil wheel of life, going through the motions and NOT practicing gratitude, being mindful etc.
Any apps out there that anyone likes? I'm always looking for new things! I've not found any that I like. It seems I cannot get calmed down enough to sit in a chair and meditate.
I also do EFT. It seems odd, but it does help. Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) - Emotional Health
I also try to do YouTube binaural beats. Google binaural beats addiction or stress or anxiety or whatever. I'll put the headphones in @ night and fall asleep to them.
In looking back @ relapses that I've had, every single time has been due to resorting back to my state of getting on the gerbil wheel of life, going through the motions and NOT practicing gratitude, being mindful etc.
Any apps out there that anyone likes? I'm always looking for new things! I've not found any that I like. It seems I cannot get calmed down enough to sit in a chair and meditate.
All is Change
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Australia
Posts: 1,284
Originally Posted by Behappy1 
...It seems I cannot get calmed down enough to sit in a chair and meditate.
Try a mind shift: Are you only meditating when you are 'calmed down enough to sit in a chair'? Instead look at it all as practising meditation also when not calm. in other words. Perhaps the most important meditation is done when it is hard.
It's the continual attempt to mediate (during time set aside for mediation) in spite of any difficulties that yields the best fruit in the long run. In the long run. Maybe not immediately but in the long run.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Welshman living in Cork, Ireland
Posts: 737
Originally Posted by Behappy1
I also try to do YouTube binaural beats. Google binaural beats addiction or stress or anxiety or whatever. I'll put the headphones in @ night and fall asleep to them..
Member
Join Date: Apr 2016
Posts: 980
Originally Posted by Sparkos
I think this would be great background while meditating. I presume you need headphones.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Welshman living in Cork, Ireland
Posts: 737
I meditated this morning with headphones and binaural beats.
I'm not sure if it helped or it's just a gimmick.
I think I prefer gentle ambient style sounds playing in the background, without headphones.
I'm not sure if it helped or it's just a gimmick.
I think I prefer gentle ambient style sounds playing in the background, without headphones.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2017
Posts: 32
Originally Posted by Frickaflip233
I pray. And not in the sense of the lords prayer. Our culture is so steeped in Christianity that I think its hard for folks to see that word in any other way. Me included. So my prayer is focused on making a conscious contact with my higher power, then asking that power to help direct me to do the right thing, whatever that may be. I have a long way to go.
Pray for the knowledge of the next right thing, Amen
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