mercede55

Hi Guys,
I am new here and trying to make some decisions about my drinking.

I am 35. I began drinking 8 years ago. One night, I got drunk and since that night, I’ve had the same pattern for the last 8 years. I drink 5-7 beers, two to three times a week.

The days that I don’t drink, I am okay without it. I might have some slights cravings here or there, but brush them off without problem.

My drinking doesn’t effect my family, work, etc. I (generally) don’t make poor decisions when I drink or get too crazy. I just hang out at home and have my beers.

But…. I’ve tried to have drying out periods (attempting to go a month or two without alcohol) and can never make it past a week! Which is a little concerning.

I enjoy my drinking days and don’t want to give it up if I don’t have to. But, I don’t want to run into health consequences from this. The only problem that my drinking causing in my life, is that it gives me anxiety that I could be ruining my health.

In your opinion, how big of a problem is my drinking? What would you do if you were in my position? Do you think I am an alcoholic and need to get help and stop all together?

Thanks for any opinions or help!

Dee74

Hi mercedes - welcome

I think if you find you can't go more than a week without alcohol, that's a problem, and if it's causing you health anxiety that's a double helping of problem.

I can't help you with cutting back, but I can tell you my health (both mental and physical) has improved out of sight since I quit drinking

D

Treerat66

Hi mercedes.
Welcome to SR.

samsepiol

Welcome. I think only you can answer these questions, but for me it was less about the quantities and more that I didn't have control over drinking and using, I was doing it even when I didn't intend to and drinking more than I intended. Also bear in mind that addictions tend to be progressive. I hope you find some good support here.

D122y

Merc,

Welcome.

Imo...you are addicted to alcohol. Alcoholic is a strong word and something that I would not put on a resume. Never liked that term.

The physical addiction is painful to break, but is fast, the mental addiction...that is the tuff part.

I started out drinking routinely when I got my first job at 17.

I had no idea about the mental damage i was doing to myself.

When I finally quit, at 50 years old, i was deeply addicted and needed booze to feel normal.

At 1 week, your are through w the detox process. The desire to drink, the need for a beer to feel better...is the brain damage.

The crave lasts forever.

Booze is highly addictive. Some folks need anti depression meds after quitting drinking...for the rest of their lives.

The education i received here and online saved my life, because when tried to quit initially...I thought I was going nuts. That is why so many folks relapse over and over.

It took me over a year clean to really start to pull out of the booze funk and feel calm and serene on my own....w out booze.

Keep reading and postg. It helps w the addiction.

In closing here...this booze thing is no joke. Folks kill themselves over it....the relapses get worse and worse.

Thanks.

Jim1958

Just my opinion, but you seem to be on a path to problems. I find your intake to be moderate, I could drink 6 beers as a warm up. I was also drinking every day. And I waited too long to try to stop. You have many things going for you. Your intake is not too bad, you are not that old. Do yourself a favor and stop. Tell people anything you want, that you are doing it for your health, you don't like the taste anymore, anything. And you will be shocked that people don't care. Unless you have reached the point where drinking is the focal point of your friendships, you can jump ship and nobody will really notice. Go to parties, live your life. Just drink ice tea or soda. And you can drive home with no chance of a DUI and wake up with no hangover. Most people live like that. Alcoholics do not. The hangovers I got toward the end would last 3 days. It took me years to realize I had a problem and years more to stop. Help yourself now, and don't wait until a small problem grows out of control. Best of luck to you.

SoberLifeForMe

Hello, mercede, and thanks for joining SR. It's wonderful here! I hope you stick around!

doggonecarl

I hung on to my drinking. Loved it, didn't want to give it up until it was absolutely necessary. But when I reached that point of necessity, alcohol had different plans and was hanging on to me. And wouldn't let go.

Moderate drinking is considered two drinks a day for men. If you can drink within those guidelines for six months--not once exceeding two drinks--you are probably not an alcoholic. If you can't (and you are already struggling with your consumption), that is a red flag.

MLD51

I enjoyed my drinking days, too, until I didn't. I can't pinpoint exactly when I made the shift from enjoying drinking to not enjoying it, but by the time I figured out I wasn't enjoying it anymore, it was too late to back away gracefully. My point is, if you are questioning your drinking, it's a sign you might be headed toward full-blown addiction. It's good that you are questioning it now, before the progression really takes hold. I like doggonecarl's suggestion above - Keep track. If you can hold it to that 2 drinks when you do drink, and never drink more than you intended to, you might be ok. If not, then you might want to hang it up. You don't want to end up drinking like a lot of us here did at the end - trust me. Nothing good comes of it. Nothing.

suzyq77

I was in a similar situation as you for some time. It didn't seem like a problem to me. When life threw curve balls (death of loved ones, break ups, increased stress at work, or just general life disappointments) it became a way for me to comfort myself and my drinking would increase. Over time tolerance increased gradually and so did the drinking.

I've quit before years ago, and it wasn't nearly as hard as this last time. Today I am 30 days sober and after the hell I've been through the last few months trying to get here, I never want to drink again. I wish I had never allowed it to become a habit!

Best of luck to you making your decision!

dox

When I tried to quit for any period of time and couldn't stick to my decision, I knew I had a problem.
My drinking progressed from there until I finally quit for good and all.
But, I couldn't quit using my own resolve.

I needed help.

I hear you asking for help.

If you can quit at this stage, you will probably be better off.
Many, like myself, have to go deeper into our problem drinking.
Sadly, many of us pursue our drug-of-choice into insanity or even death.

Not saying this is you, mind.

Delizadee

Welcome to SR! Like others have said only you can make the conclusion about whether or not you have a problem.
But, generally people who don't have a problem with drinking don't question their drinking and don't end up on a sober recovery forum.

I think if you're honest with yourself you will see a lot of red flags that point to a problem.
And even though bad things haven't happened yet... it doesn't mean they won't. I was like you when I first came here. I didn't want to listen and I wanted to keep drinking. I ended up losing pretty much everything.
I hope you will choose sobriety before things get worse and alcohol takes a strong grip on you.

Forward12

Welcome to the forum. I'd say many were in your shoes where for a time the alcohol really didn't seem to be all that bad. I think we knew deep down something wasn't right, but we kept going with it on and on until your life is literally in shambles from full blown alcoholism.
Quit while you are ahead as there is nothing but dark days to come if you keep drinking.

CaseyW

Welcome to SR, mercede55! If you do decide that a life of sobriety is the life for you, there is a ton of great support and wisdom to be found here.

^^^^ Couldn't agree more with this.

Bgo54

If you say you can't quit even though you want to then you have your answer, alcohol has a hold on you and it's usually more of an issue than it seems. I'm 35 and my habit is similar to yours, I just quit again for maybe the 10th time as I decided I would like to see my kids grow up, I'm aiming for forever this time, it's been two weeks and the longest I've gone in the last 20 years is 6 weeks but I feel like this time is different, one thing that may motivate you as it did me, you mentioned you are worried about health effects and you should be, the amount you drink is most definitely causing adverse health effects, you may think you feel fine now and you may, but not as good as you'd feel if you weren't drinking anymore, and it will catch up to you, I've seen first hand the damage of long term binge drinking, both physically and mentally, those few hours of fun in the evening are not worth taking years off of your life.

Anna

One thing I know for sure is that alcoholism is a progressive disease and it will get worse unless you stop drinking. If alcohol is causing problems in your life, then maybe it's time to stop drinking. I hope you join us.

PurpleKnight

Welcome to the Forum Mercede!!

keeppushing

The chains of habit are too weak to be felt until they are too strong to be broken. -Samuel Johnson

soberlicious

Hi mercede55,
The internal push and pull you are experiencing, where one part of you wants to stop a certain behavior and another part is compelled to continue that behavior...that is the hallmark of addiction. The internal struggle and compulsion is the state of addiction.

I see that you've said that is concerning to you, and it should be.

Even if they are not causing consequences right now, what true authentic value are your drinking nights adding to your life?

least

Welcome to the family. I didn't know I had a problem until it was impossible to stop drinking without having acute withdrawal.

I finally was able to stop drinking and it's the best decision I ever made.