alcoholic boyfriend
totfit
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Ft Collins, CO
Posts: 1,273
Unfortunately, that is something he is going to have to see for himself. If his behavior is such that you don't want to be involved, then leave him to find out on his own. Otherwise, be prepared for things to get worse and not better if he truly has an issue with alcohol. Probably the worst thing to do is to excuse or rationalize any behaviors. On the other side of the coin overindulgence or berating does not help either. Just be honest about your observations and feelings in the matter and let things be.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: US
Posts: 5,095
Hi AK and welcome!
Does he acknowledge at all his situation?
This is a great place for support and experience. There are many different forums here, also one for friends and family of alcoholics. You might want to read over there too as those folks have lots of experience with what you are dealing with.
Does he acknowledge at all his situation?
This is a great place for support and experience. There are many different forums here, also one for friends and family of alcoholics. You might want to read over there too as those folks have lots of experience with what you are dealing with.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Lakeside, Ca
Posts: 10,208
Originally Posted by angrykitty1234 
What can I do to help my alcoholic boyfriend realize what he's doing to his life.
But, mostly the long run outcome will be on his shoulders.
Order for him to read the AA Big Book -- 10 bucks or less.
Call your AA Central Office -- get locations of local AA meetings.
Then -- tell him that he needs to read and go.
Many will tell you that this won't work.
Well I know one with a month of sobriety more than me -- 9 years
who's family did this and he has stayed sober since.
Some are ready and only need a nudge.
Others could not be forced with a million dollars.
M-Bob
AA Member
Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: Silicon Valley
Posts: 2,983
Hears The Voice
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Unshackled
Posts: 7,901
Set boundaries for what you find acceptable and what you don't find acceptable.
Attach penalties when those boundaries are violated.
Enforce the penalties.
We alcoholics have Olympic-level skills at excusing our bad behavior. If you choose to accept that, so will he.
Best of luck on your journey!
Attach penalties when those boundaries are violated.
Enforce the penalties.
We alcoholics have Olympic-level skills at excusing our bad behavior. If you choose to accept that, so will he.
Best of luck on your journey!
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,512
I think your boyfriend will have to make the choice for himself to stop drinking and to recover. Hopefully he will do so. You need to remember to take care of yourself. Setting boundaries is a good idea. Have you considered AlAnon as a support for you?
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