sobersolstice

Well. I found this site soon after deciding to quit drinking in 2012 (summer solstice). I read a bunch of stuff, and everyone was super supportive. I logged off for a while because I literally forced myself to BELIEVE that alcohol was poison and something that can't be consumed. My goal was to believe that alcohol does not exist.

I was excited about being able to hold conversations at parties and bars without the alcohol talking for me. It used to give me 'liquid courage', but that faded into tired stupor most of the time (and still) in my mid 30's. Life was on the UP! Then a holiday party killed it all (6mo sober) after calling my folks and other friends up that know about my addiction; decided to drink.

Many, many relapses later, I've realized I'm taking more time away from alcohol the more I log in here and read, write, share... My time of absence from alcohol had recently been increasing. A few days here, a month there, 2 weeks here, etc...

The whole reason I kept drinking is because I was either apathetic, or somehow thought a week off was good, etc. I went into 'I don't care' mode. No family, no kids.

Now I realize that if I want a nice life with a partner, and maybe kids, I need to get my act together. I've wasted so many beautiful days laying in bed it's stupid. I can't waste anymore of my life.

I just wanted to thank the community for being supportive. I've noticed a bit more tough love in here as well, which people like myself need at times. I've written threads about how "I'm done forever", and feel bad coming back after a few days, but at least I'm thinking about it, and keep trying.

Day 2. Woke up at 3am, and can't sleep. Going to go for a short hike at sunrise, then a long day of work.

I'm going to keep a public log of my progress this time. Maybe more frequently in the beginning. I'll try to share some of my planning, which I need to do more of.

I appreciate you all!

jodc

Good Morning Solstice,

So glad to read your post this morning; you sound so appreciative, willing and ready to move forward.

Welcome!

bexxed

Heya sobersolstice.

I get lost in the weeds when I put my intentions for the future out there too much. One day at a time works much better for me.

DolAndel

Posting here seems like a great way to help you relaunch your recovery. Welcome back!

Zanna

back.

Quincy

Welcome back SummerSoltice.

Snarly

Hi Solstice,

Snarly (yep chatted earlier)

Great to read your post.

I've done a few rodeos myself.

One of my favorite quotes from the great one:

It's not whether you get knocked down, it's whether you get back up.
Vince Lombardi

Soberwolf

Grats on day 2

Lightning Bug

Welcome back!

PurpleKnight

Welcome back Solstice!!

Verte

As hard as your road has been, you sound really grateful to have arrived exactly here, sobersolstice. That's great. Welcome back

Bruno1979

Welcome back,

I love the summer solstice time of year,

I visited Stonehenge last year and drank myself into oblivion. I'm really looking forward to doing it next year with a sober mind.

Take care,

Bruno

Dee74

I really hope you can make this time be your time sobersolstice

D

sobersolstice

Friday evening, and my long day of work is slowly coming to an end. The first thing I automatically thought about is how nice it would be to enjoy some beverages. I had to shut that out. I'm not craving it physically, but had to disengage the auto-pilot button to the store.

A good dinner. Maybe a perrier.... snacks.

What foods and non-alcoholic drinks have helped curb the gap for you?

tufty13

Welcome back sobersolstice.

It's great to see you here. :-)

teatreeoil007

Anything GOOD! I know that's not an answer, but nothing can take the place of good food and water. Home-made guacamole and salsa is one of my favorites. This time of year we've got lots of garden tomatoes that are ripe for the pickin'; makes for some great salsa. Hot peppers are also good for what ails ya.

sobersolstice

I went to the same place where I deposit my checks and shop for food. Right in between the bank and market is a liquor store. I didn't look in. I walked by and got taco fixings, soda water, and ice cream.

Staying home tonight. Definitely not drinking! I have my favorite foods and snacks!

shockozulu

My favorite food once I quit drinking was Nabisco Snack Crackers. Yumm and the salt was probably good for me at that time too.

teatreeoil007

Good deal! There you go....burrow in and stay home; keep it cozy...some of the best(and sane, and peaceful and sober and less stressful) adventures are found at home....tacos sounds yummy...Just had some Tilamook S'mores ice cream. yum

teatreeoil007

Yum. I have some Wheat Thins. And I have some good cheese. Those two things ought to do rather nicely sometime this evening.