When Will Enough Be Enough?
Member
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: W Washington
Posts: 11,589
I really don't know why I worry about someone seeing me
everyone is there for the EXACT same reason as you.....meetings are where we go to get well. and i bet MANY of those silly people who "still" attend meetings 3x a week have amassed some decent sober days.
if you do go, just listen......listen to what others share.....sooner or later, probably sooner, you will hear "your" story.
everyone is there for the EXACT same reason as you.....meetings are where we go to get well. and i bet MANY of those silly people who "still" attend meetings 3x a week have amassed some decent sober days.
if you do go, just listen......listen to what others share.....sooner or later, probably sooner, you will hear "your" story.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 509
Well its 9:00 pm and I did screw up again. I didn't make it home from work sober. I stopped and bought a 6 pack. I don't know why I did it. I didn't know what else to do. I know that there is no excuse and I always have a million of them. The only good thing is that I didn't get completely wasted like normal. That's not good either I know but I have to start making a plan asap. Any suggestions would be helpful. My hardest time of the day is when I get off work in the evening, I always think I want to relax & distress with a beer. I should've tried harder, I know better than this.....
Member
Join Date: May 2016
Location: MI
Posts: 626
Just read your last post. Just start over again right now. It's done, try not to dwell on it. You can do this.... You can start right now again. Go back to the beginning of this thread and read your post. I know this is NOT easy..... Take it one minute, one hour at a time.
Wishing you lots of patience and strength tonight.
Wishing you lots of patience and strength tonight.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2016
Location: Houston, Texas
Posts: 322
...or get a job working 24-hours a day. Ask the coach to put you back in the game. This alcohol thing is a true bi**h. Perhaps get somebody close by to help you be accountable. I know you can overcome.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2016
Posts: 157
Hi CC,
welcome, and there is help and a way out, but you have to want it. For me I found AA, and a really good alcohol counseling,but I had to want to stop and more important not start again, see stopping is easy, I've done it 100 times, it is about not starting.
Let me ask you something and this is no joke, you ever been in hand cuffs, about to be arrested? If you haven't, let me tell you in cuffs, with an authority figure, you have no control, they control you, you sit, stand, and speak when they say, you have zero control. That's how alcohol is for me, one drink and the cuffs are on, I'm done, I gave up my control, alcohol takes over.
I formally admitted that 30 or so days ago, still I stumbled, and ive been sober 17 days now and working with a good sponsor. There just has to be a time, when you refuse to be cuffed, and just don't give power to poison. Well thats my 2 cents. Peace be with you.
Mick
welcome, and there is help and a way out, but you have to want it. For me I found AA, and a really good alcohol counseling,but I had to want to stop and more important not start again, see stopping is easy, I've done it 100 times, it is about not starting.
Let me ask you something and this is no joke, you ever been in hand cuffs, about to be arrested? If you haven't, let me tell you in cuffs, with an authority figure, you have no control, they control you, you sit, stand, and speak when they say, you have zero control. That's how alcohol is for me, one drink and the cuffs are on, I'm done, I gave up my control, alcohol takes over.
I formally admitted that 30 or so days ago, still I stumbled, and ive been sober 17 days now and working with a good sponsor. There just has to be a time, when you refuse to be cuffed, and just don't give power to poison. Well thats my 2 cents. Peace be with you.
Mick
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 509
I went on to bed last night and did not drink anymore. I tossed and turned most of the night and I started having major night sweats. I got up early this morning and I'm feeling positive. Thank you all for your input. I understand I do have to take it minute by minute because it sneaks up on me fast. I'm thinking of maybe going to a counselor for awhile maybe that will help.
Mick, I have never been put in handcuffs and arrested. But , that is exactly how I feel when I take that first drink, the alcohol takes control. That's a good way for me to look at it. I feel like alcohol has had me imprisoned for far too long. I'm hoping to get through this day sober.
Mick, I have never been put in handcuffs and arrested. But , that is exactly how I feel when I take that first drink, the alcohol takes control. That's a good way for me to look at it. I feel like alcohol has had me imprisoned for far too long. I'm hoping to get through this day sober.
blessyouall
Join Date: Dec 2014
Location: Chi-town area
Posts: 19
CC...interesting that I think you meant to say de-stress with a beer and instead typed distress...which is what it does to all of us in truth, creates nothing but distress!!! This can be your last day one, celebrate life!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 509
Distress is what it does for sure! I'm hoping for a last day one today. Did any of you all have anxiety when you quit drinking. I seem to get extremely anxious. I just feel like my nerves are shot without a drink. That's why it seems to calm me. Does any of that make sense?
Work in Progress
Join Date: Aug 2016
Location: Boca Raton, FL
Posts: 50
Originally Posted by CountryChick 
I am so sick of being sick and tired... I went to AA a few years ago but I didn't like it. I will try to keep posting on here and read everyone's stories. It definitely helps knowing that I'm no the only one. And it helps seeing how people succeed.
I know what you mean about AA. I would give you the same advice I got when I first joined: go to several meetings, and don't give up if they don't feel "right" for you. I went to four before I found one that clicked with me. In my case, I didn't like the co-ed ones with both men and women. I found a women only meeting that I could relate to much better.
Don't give up, and keep posting here! We've all been there, and can help you keep perspective.
Work in Progress
Join Date: Aug 2016
Location: Boca Raton, FL
Posts: 50
Originally Posted by CountryChick
Well its 9:00 pm and I did screw up again. I didn't make it home from work sober. I stopped and bought a 6 pack. I don't know why I did it. I didn't know what else to do. I know that there is no excuse and I always have a million of them. The only good thing is that I didn't get completely wasted like normal. That's not good either I know but I have to start making a plan asap. Any suggestions would be helpful. My hardest time of the day is when I get off work in the evening, I always think I want to relax & distress with a beer. I should've tried harder, I know better than this.....
Work in Progress
Join Date: Aug 2016
Location: Boca Raton, FL
Posts: 50
Originally Posted by CountryChick
Distress is what it does for sure! I'm hoping for a last day one today. Did any of you all have anxiety when you quit drinking. I seem to get extremely anxious. I just feel like my nerves are shot without a drink. That's why it seems to calm me. Does any of that make sense?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 509
Thanks Chanchiluv, I think a woman's group would be great. I'll have to search into that. I've decided to take a different route home this evening and when I get there I'm going to get on the treadmill and try to walk my stresses away. Exercise did help me before.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 508
Alcohol actually causes anxiety in the long run and it certainly doesn't help it,
Exercise and trying to put healthy things in the body is a good start, as is changing habits and distracting techniques too.
My first few weeks without drinking were full of me imprisoning myself so I didn't 'accidentally' buy more booze.
I stayed home as much as possible, I read loads of stuff here on SR about how it feels and the sorts of things that are 'normal' to feel those first few days.
I have had to learn to trust myself again.... You can do this, get support from wherever it's available AA, SMART, RR, your dr, counselling, other online forums and here at SR...
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Exercise and trying to put healthy things in the body is a good start, as is changing habits and distracting techniques too.
My first few weeks without drinking were full of me imprisoning myself so I didn't 'accidentally' buy more booze.
I stayed home as much as possible, I read loads of stuff here on SR about how it feels and the sorts of things that are 'normal' to feel those first few days.
I have had to learn to trust myself again.... You can do this, get support from wherever it's available AA, SMART, RR, your dr, counselling, other online forums and here at SR...
<__NSCFInputStream: 0x16e7c9c0>
Join Date: Sep 2016
Posts: 847
Originally Posted by CountryChick
I just feel like my nerves are shot without a drink. That's why it seems to calm me. Does any of that make sense?
There is a classic book that explains the progression and the reason for some of the various symptoms:
Under the Influence: A Guide to the Myths and Realities of Alcoholism by James R. Milam and Katherine Ketcham
It is a fairly easy read, and while I don't agree with the diagnosis or the suggested treatment, it really does describe the way alcohol works on the body, and its progressive effects, extremely well. Quite an eye opener.You can probably find it at the local library for free, or online fairly cheap.
A Day at a Time
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Grand Rapids MI
Posts: 6,435
Originally Posted by CountryChick
I am so sick of being sick and tired... I went to AA a few years ago but I didn't like it. I will try to keep posting on here and read everyone's stories. It definitely helps knowing that I'm no the only one. And it helps seeing how people succeed.
There is a wonderful sober world to be had if we are willing to change
Member
Join Date: Sep 2016
Posts: 119
Originally Posted by CountryChick
Hello everyone. I've been nervous about posting on here. But here goes.
I've been struggling to get sober for at least 15 years. The past 5 years have been the hardest. It seems to get worse each time I drink now. I may have lost my fiancé because of it. I have also shown my 15 year old son what a drunk his mom has become. And for that I'm so ashamed but I still continue to drink. When will enough be enough for me? I ask myself this each time I screw up.
Last year I drove drunk & passed out on the side of the road and luckily didn't kill someone or myself. I woke up with cops staring at me. I was very lucky that night because I didn't go to jail either. I thought I'd had enough, I got sober for 90 days. I relapsed in May and I've been drinking ever since. During this time I've made a total a** of myself. I keep trying to control how much I drink but it never works. Last night I got so drunk while making supper I passed out on the couch. I woke up to my fiancé yelling that I could've burned the house down. Will this be enough to make me quit for good this time?!?! I think it will be but it seems like I always go back to it. I'm so tired of doing this over and over! I feel like nothing but a failure!
Anyway, thanks for listening.
I've been struggling to get sober for at least 15 years. The past 5 years have been the hardest. It seems to get worse each time I drink now. I may have lost my fiancé because of it. I have also shown my 15 year old son what a drunk his mom has become. And for that I'm so ashamed but I still continue to drink. When will enough be enough for me? I ask myself this each time I screw up.
Last year I drove drunk & passed out on the side of the road and luckily didn't kill someone or myself. I woke up with cops staring at me. I was very lucky that night because I didn't go to jail either. I thought I'd had enough, I got sober for 90 days. I relapsed in May and I've been drinking ever since. During this time I've made a total a** of myself. I keep trying to control how much I drink but it never works. Last night I got so drunk while making supper I passed out on the couch. I woke up to my fiancé yelling that I could've burned the house down. Will this be enough to make me quit for good this time?!?! I think it will be but it seems like I always go back to it. I'm so tired of doing this over and over! I feel like nothing but a failure!
Anyway, thanks for listening.
Stay strong, you can absolutely do this. It will be worth the fight.
Guest
Join Date: May 2014
Location: Denver, CO
Posts: 80
Originally Posted by CountryChick
Distress is what it does for sure! I'm hoping for a last day one today. Did any of you all have anxiety when you quit drinking. I seem to get extremely anxious. I just feel like my nerves are shot without a drink. That's why it seems to calm me. Does any of that make sense?
Member
Join Date: Aug 2016
Location: Houston, Texas
Posts: 322
I didn't like AA either. The wanted me to quit drinking, make systematic changes in my life, be completely honest, understand spirituality, and do things I was uncomfortable doing. Actually I don't think there was much of anything I liked about getting sober but when I started doing what people with long term did my life started improving. My solutions almost killed me so I came to believe it was time to try the solutions of others. If we do not change we are condemned to stay the same.
There is a wonderful sober world to be had if we are willing to change
There is a wonderful sober world to be had if we are willing to change
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