Marissah

I hAve been "secret" drinking for over a year now. When anyone confronts me I lie and say I haven't been drinking. Let's be real though anyone can tell. I'm not very good at hiding things. This is killing my husband inside because he doesn't understand why I do it. Or even why I drink every day and hide it. I don't want to live like this anymore and I am truly in need of some advise.
Anone?

cwood3

Talk to your husband. You can stop drinking and preserve sanity in the household at the same time, if you be upfront and honest...with him and yourself. You have a golden opportunity just waiting to happen. You are lucky.

Marissah

I have tried.. it seems like I always find an excuses to drive to the liquor store..

Zanna

Hi Believe me, there is no such thing as 'secret drinking', no matter how much we want there to be. Even vodka, the 'odourless' drink, has a perfumey smell to it and that's before we take into account the change in personality, it causes.
You've made a good call, signing up for this site! Sounds like you want to sort things out and you couldn't have come to a better place Welcome!

Bobbieka

I did that for several years. It wasn't much at the beginning. But, as alcoholism is progressive, I became the poster child. Talk to your husband. Be honest. He will be relieved, you know he already knows. Everyone around me knew. I made a huge mess of things before it got better. Don't be me.

cwood3

C O M M I T M E N T.................that has to occur, no if's, and's, or but's. That's just the way it works. That's why we are here. You can get this done....you really actually can. Ask anybody here.

Soberwolf

Welcome Marrissah nice to meet you stick around its a great community x

August252015

You have to stop. Just for today, just try it.

Be honest with your husband, as others said - he knows anyway and it is important for YOU to admit it is a problem.

AA? Just try one meeting.

You CAN live a completely different life if you stop drinking.

Good luck.

uncorked

Hi Marrissah and welcome. I agree with what someone said about secret drinking not being a secret. Even if your husband can't smell it on your breath, your personality probably changes when you drink. I used to "hide" my wine bottles/glasses everywhere but I fooled no one. You probably feel guilty and terrible (I did). Getting and staying sober was a lot easier than I thought it would be. I went inpatient rehab and getting the alcohol out of my system and life for 7 weeks was just the start I needed to stop drinking altogether. That was 10 months ago and I've been sober ever since. My husband and I are no longer together but life is infinitely better now that I can respect myself in the morning.

Tonymblue

I was the same. The best thing I did was to come clean. I say talk to him explain what it's like.

jodc

Secret drinking...I've been thinking about this for too long.
I am new here and just starting my journey. One of the things that I have had to come to terms with is that I am fooling nobody but myself.
ICK. UGH. YUCK.
Thank you for posting this. It really helps me today.

Blessings to you.

resolute50

Hello and welcome to SR/

My advice would be to stick around these forums. That is the first thing to do.
I see too many folks drop in here and then move on.
Take some time here. Learn from people that have been through it. We all have stories of hiding,drinking and the disappointments.

So first off. Why not hang out with us a while.

Anna

I did that, too, Marissah. The disease of alcoholism turns us into liars, among other things. But, you can end the secret drinking and move on with your life as a sober person. There is lots of inspiration here, so I hope you keep reading and posting.

Quincy

Welcome. I agree that to be honest is probably the best. I'm new here and a couple of weeks ago I laid it all out on the table to my family in a relaxed setting. It was tough to do because I'm a prideful person, but it was such a relief for me and I believe for them.

It's nice to not have the skeleton in my closet and be able to talk with them about it when I'm having a rough day. By being honest with them they can now be part of my support network and recovery plan.

Like others have suggested I would take the time to read around the site. It helped me understand the disease so I could look at myself and realize the extent of my problem, the types of things people are and have done to stay sober and reading the success stories really gives me hope and desire to continue down the path of sobriety.

MIRecovery

I kept my secret so well the only person who didn't know I was an alcoholic was me.

If you want to end the madness make a plan, get honest and get help before you give away everything you love to alcohol

Dee74

Hi and welcome Marrisah - this community changed everything for me...just knowing I wasn't alone and that I could be honest helped.

I know we can help you too

D

Zebra1275

Welcome to SR!

Lots of good advice so far, stick around!

fgo

Hi marrisah,
I was a secret drinker and I live alone ,talk about crazy,. Glad you are here.

Delilah1

Hi Marissah,

Welcome to SR! Glad you found us. How are you doing tonight?

Nonsensical

That's called addiction.
I was ate up with it.
People on this forum helped me find my way out.
Let's find your way out.

Welcome to the fight of your life.

You can do this.