tomsteve

ok, google,"promises in the big book."
theres a whole lot more promises than whatsread at meetings. heres a good set:
And we have ceased fighting anything or anyone - even alcohol. For by this time sanity will have returned. We will seldom be interested in liquor. If tempted, we recoil from it as from a hot flame. We react sanely and normally, and we will find that this has happened automatically. We will see that our new attitude toward liquor has been given us without any thought or effort on our part. It just comes! That is the miracle of it. We are not fighting it, neither are we avoiding temptation. We feel as though we had been placed in a position of neutrality - safe and protected. We have not even sworn off. Instead, the problem has been removed. It does not exist for us. We are neither cocky nor are we afraid. That is our experience. That is how we react so long as we keep in fit spiritual condition.

yeah, that self pity crushed me horribly. a line from bills story hit me hard:


No words can tell of the loneliness and despair I found in that bitter morass of self-pity. Quicksand stretched around me in all directions. I had met my match. I had been overwhelmed. Alcohol was my master.


then i got a new master-one that could help me solve all of my problems.


E, recovery is a process that requires time-time and working the steps, preferrably with the assistance of a sponsor. the craving,compulsion, and obsession dont dissapear instantly and require action(that set of promises i posted are 10th step promises).

but first a decision has to be made that youre willing to go to ANY lengths for victory over alcohol.

Eliasson

You all are so right. Thank you for speaking light and hope into my darkness.
I am without a doubt an alcoholic. There are some sucky circumstances in my life right now but alcohol can't be an answer for me ever again. It doesn't work.
I am willing to do whatever it takes I don't want my bottom to go any lower. I want my life to count for something.

Wtbaf16

Hi E. So sorry to hear about your struggles but please hang on in there. We are all here for each other so please use us. I'm exactly where you are. I know this thing is taking over my life and making me miserable with it but stopping isn't as easy as one might hope. Relapses are common-place as is self-loathing. I started my journey (again) on July 5th, one slight relapse mid July ( grabbed a drink but threw most if it out when I realised what I was doing), but can tell you that it is not easy. I keep thinking to myself, each day is another opportunity to straighten up and do the right thing. I come on this site often, and have taken up evening hobbies and activities so that I am busy during the times I would normally drink. Even with this there are times when I think, "oh, I'm OK now, maybe I'll drink just one glass then stop". We all know that I would never stop at just one glass.

It is doable though, there are many inspiring people in this forum who have stopped drinking and are here to help us through it!

Good luck.

AmbrosiaBlue

Please don't give up! You have come so far and you will continue to go further! It is worth it. Maybe changing up your support and creating a more feasible lifestyle routine will help

lovetolisten

I'm sorry about the way you are feeling. Please don't give up because you feel like you've failed. For years, I swore up and down I would never drink again, and was consistently back at it 3-4 days later

sugarbear1

Sending lots of love and hugs to you!!!

You CAN do this!!! Start as soon as now.....

With more love and hugs,
~SB