mbrett

Hi all... I've been on the site for a few years but truly hate drinking but can't stop. I have had many physical problems and am so sick of thinking about drinking all the time. All I do is concentrate on how to get beer. I know many of you have been through this so I'm asking for support... again. Hit 3aa meetings this week ... still drank. Gotta hang it up... alienated myself from all my friends and family and just turned 40. Ugh. Any help is greatly appreciated. I plan on hitting the noon aa tomorrow and expressing myself. Thank you, Brett

FreeOwl

I'd like to suggest you immediately eliminate the phrases 'can't stop' and 'gotta stop' - and every variation thereof from your thinking and speech.

Replace them with 'have continued to struggle' and 'Am ready and willing to embrace sobriety' or any variation of that nature.

Our own self talk is important, and we can condemn ourselves to failure with 'can't' and 'have to'

Delilah1

Hi Brett,

You can do this. What else are you doing to work on your recovery? It took me a while to finally get the stopping for good right as well. It really helped me to have plans for the time I would have been drinking: go for a walk, do something with the kids, yoga, gym, bubble bath, read, binge on Netflix... Anything that would refocus my thinking. The urges have lessened as time passes, every now and again the thought of drinking crosses my mind, and I distract myself until it passes.

What do you enjoy doing?

teatreeoil007

The mind is very powerful.... Try to empty your thoughts with meditation... And then get your thoughts on something else....read a good book... That's a good way to get your thoughts elsewhere 👍🏻

least

You can stop drinking, and you will stop when you want to be sober more than you want to drink.

Soberwolf

You can stop drinking anyone can stop drinking but you have to want to stop drinking

Babescake

I think you should also eliminate phrases like "I'm a bum" from your vocab. We are SOOOO hard on ourselves, and we rot our own self-esteem. We are ALL better than this. (I must remember this myself.)

Hevyn

Brett - I'm so glad you posted. You absolutely can do this. I drank almost 30 yrs. & now have over 8 sober. You are never alone. Please keep posting - this can be the time you get free.

Wastinglife

Hi Brett, I can relate. I'm turning 40 in August and I have also alienated my friends and family with my drinking. It's taken over my life really. I've been to rehab, done therapy but still can't stay sober. I'm on day 8 now and out of desperation, I walked into an AA meeting on Saturday and asked for help. I got a sponsor and a big book, gonna work the steps. I didn't really think AA was for me but I have no where else to turn. Have you thought about actually doing the steps?

soberclover

Yup.....you can stop drinking. You have to do whatever it takes to not drink....no matter what. Glad you are going to the meetings. What an awesome way to start your 40's!!

mbrett

Thank you all. I do have to improve my attitude. Drinking just brings me down after the initial up of the first few drinks. The anxiety is atrocious but it too shall pass I'm sure. Thank you again I'm gonna stay close to SR and aa over the next few days/weeks. No seizures I hope. I wish everyone on the site health and happiness. I have some hope now.

teatreeoil007

Good to hear Brett. Let us know if there's any way we can help. You can turn your life around, and, you are NOT a BUM!

Fly N Buy

Keep coming back friend. It took me a long time to get started - soon two years.

Good points/suggestions and support from friends here. When I finally hit my head hard enough things changed.

That elevator doesn't have to go all the way down.

Berrybean

How's it going today? Hope you're feeling a little more positive.

I struggled to read the AA literature in my first month or so as my ability to focus was very poor. The AA speaker recordings helped a lot between meetings. Here's a link to the site I use to download them (free) just in case it might help a little... 5500+ AA Speakers & Tapes - Organized & Mobile-Friendly!
You can search by steps. Any on the step 1 section is likely to be useful.

Keep reading and posting, and getting to meetings. These recovery communities are like life boats. Try to stay in the middle so people can help keep you safe while you build up the strength to cling on.

Take care. We're rooting for ya.

Mountainmanbob

AA has helped many I know to get and stay sober.
Church and bible studies have helped many others.

I was willing to do it all
so as to improve my chances I think.

A nice sober day wished for all,
M-Bob