Back to Sober Basics Weekender April 8th
Member
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Seattle, WA
Posts: 2,443
One day at a time.
I leaned on that for strength and hope and a plan in the very beginning and early months of my sobriety.
I go back to that, occasionally if I think about drinking, and quite often actually for the crap of real life.
Take a deep breath, or ten, and back to the basics.
Thank you Weasel!
Climbing aboard the sober bus!!!
I leaned on that for strength and hope and a plan in the very beginning and early months of my sobriety.
I go back to that, occasionally if I think about drinking, and quite often actually for the crap of real life.
Take a deep breath, or ten, and back to the basics.
Thank you Weasel!
Climbing aboard the sober bus!!!
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: PA
Posts: 12,000
it was around 20 degrees the past few days in the morning - cold.
Today is 50 to start out the morning - could be spring is gonna take over.
Speaking of scat, here's Cab Calloway...
And here is a pic of what I'm trying to eat right now... Then shower gather my things and head to Philly, stop at costco on the way home - cash in my rewards. Rewards = FREE membership for a year.
And get some fruits...
Today is 50 to start out the morning - could be spring is gonna take over.
Speaking of scat, here's Cab Calloway...
And here is a pic of what I'm trying to eat right now... Then shower gather my things and head to Philly, stop at costco on the way home - cash in my rewards. Rewards = FREE membership for a year.
And get some fruits...
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 9,029
I'm in. Good to see you Trees and Dean. Congratulations Behan.
Back to basics. No drinking. I made up my mind and accepted I couldn't drink. I started to establish new routines. Healthier routines. And I started reaching out for support. Here and in real life through AA meetings and friends I'd met there. I went to meetings at times I'd be likely to drink, like Friday evenings. I don't forget HALT. If I have urges I check whether I'm hungry, angry, lonely or tired.
There's more. But on s random note, Rogue One. Star Wars offshoot. Looks cool.
Back to basics. No drinking. I made up my mind and accepted I couldn't drink. I started to establish new routines. Healthier routines. And I started reaching out for support. Here and in real life through AA meetings and friends I'd met there. I went to meetings at times I'd be likely to drink, like Friday evenings. I don't forget HALT. If I have urges I check whether I'm hungry, angry, lonely or tired.
There's more. But on s random note, Rogue One. Star Wars offshoot. Looks cool.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: California
Posts: 13,044
Good Morning Everyone!
Ken, great post. I think reason this in the morning helps, waking up with a clear head and no hangover is an automatic reminder of why sobriety is worth it.
The biggest thing for me is to have an alternate activity planned for times I would have poured myself a glass of wine. My activites vary: go for a walk, gane with the kids, read, yoga, bath, log onto SR. It goes back to having a plan.
Happy Thursday everyone!!!
Ken, great post. I think reason this in the morning helps, waking up with a clear head and no hangover is an automatic reminder of why sobriety is worth it.
The biggest thing for me is to have an alternate activity planned for times I would have poured myself a glass of wine. My activites vary: go for a walk, gane with the kids, read, yoga, bath, log onto SR. It goes back to having a plan.
Happy Thursday everyone!!!
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: PA
Posts: 12,000
One last look at google maps, I don't trust the lady in the dashboard to get me where I want to go by the most logical route. I wonder if it had a man's voice would it make more sense? hmmmmmmm?
I finished all but half cup of that bowl of nasty. Means I choked down about 3 cups...
At least it was healthy
Oats, walnuts and cocoa powder... with a touch of buckwheat honey....
have a good day
I finished all but half cup of that bowl of nasty. Means I choked down about 3 cups...
At least it was healthy
Oats, walnuts and cocoa powder... with a touch of buckwheat honey....have a good day
...holds the key
Join Date: Dec 2014
Location: Texas
Posts: 7,065
Must remember coffee before looking at weekender. Saw Brains bowl of mush first thing! Eww!
I'm on board for another scintillating sober weekend! Woke up to an unwanted and startling text asking for help with something I can't help with. I immediately started planning how to rearrange my day ...but have to work and nothing I can do about that....then realized I can't fix everything for everyone.
Ok...time for coffee
Xo
I'm on board for another scintillating sober weekend! Woke up to an unwanted and startling text asking for help with something I can't help with. I immediately started planning how to rearrange my day ...but have to work and nothing I can do about that....then realized I can't fix everything for everyone.
Ok...time for coffee
Xo
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 9,029
Drat. Lost a long post. Brain, remember to put honey on your list. I usually have frozen berries for just such emergencies.
I made one train earlier than I usually catch and didn't run for it either. Dropped kids off at school earlier than I usually do.
Brynn, your comment that you can't fix everything for everyone is so true. I used to make myself crazy trying to do just that. I've gotten better but it's still a struggle at times.
I made one train earlier than I usually catch and didn't run for it either. Dropped kids off at school earlier than I usually do.
Brynn, your comment that you can't fix everything for everyone is so true. I used to make myself crazy trying to do just that. I've gotten better but it's still a struggle at times.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 2,129
I'm in!
Back to basics, hmm... I love the basics!
Ice cream! Making sure I always have ice cream on hand, bc it seems to fix things that have nothing to do with hunger! I still keep ice cream around, that will be permanent. It scratches that late night itch when you get in bed but your mind isn't ready to shut up.
I loved trees post about being tidy, particular and proud. That resonated with me bc I used to be like that years ago. And now I wish I was but I fight myself with little junk piles and boxes of useless crap. Definitely something to work on. I want to be free. Trees, you have inspired me!! Thank you.
I feel like the basics change at each phase of recovery... So much of the first year is about and should be about self care, the proper feeding of yourself, rest, quiet, cocooning a bit, no sudden moves or changes.. Etc. Treating yourself as a cherished newborn.
Even if you think you don't deserve it bc of all the dumb stuff you did drunk. Punishing yourself can wait. And hopefully you never feel that need to punish yourself. It's futile. And counter productive.
Slowly, the basics turn to incorporate more stuff- cleaning up your finances, cleaning up your mental housekeeping, improving relationships, etc.
I was in such a rush to get 'all better' and the pressure led me to drink again. Now I understand to take it slow and steady, that the lesson is in the nuance and the feeling, not always in the words...
And finally, back to basics for me meant surrender. I go to AA meetings a lot now. I'm working the steps with a sponsor. I chaired my first meeting last night. I'm finding the relief I always craved. It took a long time. I went to my first meeting around 14 years ago and fought the program until this round.
The feeling apart from and other than which isolated me and made drinking so appealing is gone. It's a miracle and I'm very grateful.
Those are some of my basics. I hope everyone takes it easy on themselves this Weekender.
One of my favorite 'basics' was the fun I had trying out new LaCroix flavors! Blackberry Cucumber and Cerise Limon will always have special places in my heart as I searched for yummy treats just to experience new refreshing flavors that didn't contain alcohol.
Back to basics, hmm... I love the basics!
Ice cream! Making sure I always have ice cream on hand, bc it seems to fix things that have nothing to do with hunger! I still keep ice cream around, that will be permanent. It scratches that late night itch when you get in bed but your mind isn't ready to shut up.
I loved trees post about being tidy, particular and proud. That resonated with me bc I used to be like that years ago. And now I wish I was but I fight myself with little junk piles and boxes of useless crap. Definitely something to work on. I want to be free. Trees, you have inspired me!! Thank you.
I feel like the basics change at each phase of recovery... So much of the first year is about and should be about self care, the proper feeding of yourself, rest, quiet, cocooning a bit, no sudden moves or changes.. Etc. Treating yourself as a cherished newborn.
Even if you think you don't deserve it bc of all the dumb stuff you did drunk. Punishing yourself can wait. And hopefully you never feel that need to punish yourself. It's futile. And counter productive.
Slowly, the basics turn to incorporate more stuff- cleaning up your finances, cleaning up your mental housekeeping, improving relationships, etc.
I was in such a rush to get 'all better' and the pressure led me to drink again. Now I understand to take it slow and steady, that the lesson is in the nuance and the feeling, not always in the words...
And finally, back to basics for me meant surrender. I go to AA meetings a lot now. I'm working the steps with a sponsor. I chaired my first meeting last night. I'm finding the relief I always craved. It took a long time. I went to my first meeting around 14 years ago and fought the program until this round.
The feeling apart from and other than which isolated me and made drinking so appealing is gone. It's a miracle and I'm very grateful.
Those are some of my basics. I hope everyone takes it easy on themselves this Weekender.
One of my favorite 'basics' was the fun I had trying out new LaCroix flavors! Blackberry Cucumber and Cerise Limon will always have special places in my heart as I searched for yummy treats just to experience new refreshing flavors that didn't contain alcohol.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2015
Posts: 2,393
Originally Posted by Behan 
LOL - thanks guys, I saw my chance and I took it!!
Great intro K. My last few weekends have been very busy with travelling or visitors coming to the house. As a result, many of the basics of the household have been neglected. Although each task is small, they have built up to create noticeable problems. This weekend, as I catch up on the household basics, I will also pay attention to the living basics: what are the essential things that I need to do to live well and thrive:
1. Don't drink (or take drugs)
2. Eat well (and the other essentials for our biological survival)
3. Connect with humans (or animals)
4. Move your body
5. Remember not to drink.
B
Great intro K. My last few weekends have been very busy with travelling or visitors coming to the house. As a result, many of the basics of the household have been neglected. Although each task is small, they have built up to create noticeable problems. This weekend, as I catch up on the household basics, I will also pay attention to the living basics: what are the essential things that I need to do to live well and thrive:
1. Don't drink (or take drugs)
2. Eat well (and the other essentials for our biological survival)
3. Connect with humans (or animals)
4. Move your body
5. Remember not to drink.
B
Excellent posts already and terrific intro. Thank you all...I am in!
And I hope Fabela will climb aboard with a new pup to hang its head out the window!
Giving up is NOT an option.
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Western Wisconsin
Posts: 7,809
"The feeling apart from and other than which isolated me and made drinking so appealing is gone. It's a miracle and I'm very grateful."
Melina, your whole post is spot on for me, but the above line resonated especially. For me, that was the feeling I got almost immediately when I went to AA and started telling my story honestly. I did the same thing in treatment. I found out that I'm NOT different. Everyone has much the same struggles in life. If we'd all be authentic with each other, so many things in the world would change. I don't think it's a Pollyanna outlook to say that if humans leaned to relate to each other from an honest place, a lot of the world's problems could be solved. But it also works at a smaller scale - in our everyday lives. One of the basics for me has been learning to be honest - first with myself, then with everyone else. It's one of the best feelings. Yeah, it's hard at first, and can feel pretty icky to admit your own faults to yourself. But the rewards are great. When you can look in the mirror and say "I have been selfish." Or "I lied a lot." Or "I am a perfectionist to an unhealthy extent." Then you can begin to make progress on improving yourself so that you don't need a drink or drug to be able to live with yourself every day.
Melina, your whole post is spot on for me, but the above line resonated especially. For me, that was the feeling I got almost immediately when I went to AA and started telling my story honestly. I did the same thing in treatment. I found out that I'm NOT different. Everyone has much the same struggles in life. If we'd all be authentic with each other, so many things in the world would change. I don't think it's a Pollyanna outlook to say that if humans leaned to relate to each other from an honest place, a lot of the world's problems could be solved. But it also works at a smaller scale - in our everyday lives. One of the basics for me has been learning to be honest - first with myself, then with everyone else. It's one of the best feelings. Yeah, it's hard at first, and can feel pretty icky to admit your own faults to yourself. But the rewards are great. When you can look in the mirror and say "I have been selfish." Or "I lied a lot." Or "I am a perfectionist to an unhealthy extent." Then you can begin to make progress on improving yourself so that you don't need a drink or drug to be able to live with yourself every day.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Gulf Coast, USA
Posts: 2,229
Hi everybody. I'm in and fantastic intro Ken, as usual!
Back to the basics... I spent many times early on fooling myself that I was going to try to get sober but in the back of my mind I left the door open to drink again one day. Most times, that one day came the very same night. That is until I went 9 months sober, but again that one day came calling.
Until I gave in completely that drinking had no place in my life, I was setting myself up for failure.
I basically had to clear my mind of any future opening to drink... no matter what. I still take my sobriety one day at a time, but I no longer hold the door open to "I might drink again one day".
Have a great day everybody.
Back to the basics... I spent many times early on fooling myself that I was going to try to get sober but in the back of my mind I left the door open to drink again one day. Most times, that one day came the very same night. That is until I went 9 months sober, but again that one day came calling.
Until I gave in completely that drinking had no place in my life, I was setting myself up for failure.
I basically had to clear my mind of any future opening to drink... no matter what. I still take my sobriety one day at a time, but I no longer hold the door open to "I might drink again one day".
Have a great day everybody.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2015
Posts: 2,393
MLD...truth is beauty, is it not? I love what you said and how:
" I don't think it's a Pollyanna outlook to say that if humans leaned to relate to each other from an honest place, a lot of the world's problems could be solved. But it also works at a smaller scale - in our everyday lives."
" I don't think it's a Pollyanna outlook to say that if humans leaned to relate to each other from an honest place, a lot of the world's problems could be solved. But it also works at a smaller scale - in our everyday lives."
Giving up is NOT an option.
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Western Wisconsin
Posts: 7,809
And on tidiness and order- I need to work on this. I was married to a neat freak. I am not one. So things have deteriorated at my house since he's been gone. But I know when things are in their places, I feel better mentally. So I'm working on purging stuff and finding places for things. A bit at a time. I want to feel calm in my own home and when there are junk piles it's all nerve-jangly.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 2,129
Originally Posted by BixBees505
MLD...truth is beauty, is it not? I love what you said and how:
" I don't think it's a Pollyanna outlook to say that if humans leaned to relate to each other from an honest place, a lot of the world's problems could be solved. But it also works at a smaller scale - in our everyday lives."
" I don't think it's a Pollyanna outlook to say that if humans leaned to relate to each other from an honest place, a lot of the world's problems could be solved. But it also works at a smaller scale - in our everyday lives."
It's amazing what happens in the fellowship of AA. Simply talking to each other as humans and being recognized. It is so validating. It's not the forced yucky 'small talk' that in the real world would have me glued to the bar desperately gulping down vodka sodas to get through all the hypocrisy and forced niceness.
These people get my brand of crazy and we are gentle with each other as we teach each other how to navigate the big scary world as considerate and loving humans.
You want to talk about back to basics? THE LAUGHTER! The laughter I experience in sobriety, in the AA rooms and in the fellowship before and after meetings... Wow.
It is the sound of lives being rebuilt, of confidence growing, of positive emotions poking their heads out of our damaged and sad souls. Rebirth, renewal, redemption. It's awesome!
Xoxo
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Colorado
Posts: 3,474
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Yo Troopz ~
Here's the South Patio Concrete Pour as of last Night. To keep the Concrete somewhat pliable to accept these hard Rubber Flagstone Patterns that are then stomped on, this Project is broken up into 3 Pours. The second one just occurred. To Hand Broadcast the Tint Powder in all those 5 Gallon Buckets [~$1,600- worth!], the Gents have to get on with it to beat the predictable Afternoon Breezes up here.
A massive separate piece with an Elk stamped in it will be the main Step/Landing in the middle to step down to Grade. This Concrete Gent's Fees are good enough, I'm having him also pour me a Truck Parking Slab on the large side: 24' deep x 12' wide. Paving rocks when you need level surfaces up off the Dirt.
A Gal Estimator from a local Fence Company stops by later today to gimme a quote on rebuilding the aging Automated Gate Infrastructure I did >10 Years ago. I'm also buying some used Ranch Panels later from a Dog Park Pal to protect my new 'Net Antenna Pole/Electronics by the Gate from the Cow Fooks that escape from next Door a few times/Year.
With Drinking firmly and forever off my Personal Chess Board Of Life, I now focus on what's in front of me. Case-in-point: I had to plan out now-buried Electrical Conduit runs, and buried Gutter Downspout locations prior to Concrete pouring.
I don't move imaginary Chessboard Pieces around where some Pieces represent Drinking again. I plucked those Pieces off the Chess Board, and threw them away. It's quite satisfying. The Mental Turmoil dissipates this way - along with benefits from Aging - and takes with it any urge to Drink. RIP MoFo AV. Returning to Drinking is a long-dead Option; a nice, self-sustaining point to have reached >2 Years in. If/when I need the rare reminder, I pop over to the Main Boards here.
You can't lust after that which you no longer want. Zen 101...
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Yo Troopz ~
Here's the South Patio Concrete Pour as of last Night. To keep the Concrete somewhat pliable to accept these hard Rubber Flagstone Patterns that are then stomped on, this Project is broken up into 3 Pours. The second one just occurred. To Hand Broadcast the Tint Powder in all those 5 Gallon Buckets [~$1,600- worth!], the Gents have to get on with it to beat the predictable Afternoon Breezes up here.
A massive separate piece with an Elk stamped in it will be the main Step/Landing in the middle to step down to Grade. This Concrete Gent's Fees are good enough, I'm having him also pour me a Truck Parking Slab on the large side: 24' deep x 12' wide. Paving rocks when you need level surfaces up off the Dirt.
A Gal Estimator from a local Fence Company stops by later today to gimme a quote on rebuilding the aging Automated Gate Infrastructure I did >10 Years ago. I'm also buying some used Ranch Panels later from a Dog Park Pal to protect my new 'Net Antenna Pole/Electronics by the Gate from the Cow Fooks that escape from next Door a few times/Year.
With Drinking firmly and forever off my Personal Chess Board Of Life, I now focus on what's in front of me. Case-in-point: I had to plan out now-buried Electrical Conduit runs, and buried Gutter Downspout locations prior to Concrete pouring.
I don't move imaginary Chessboard Pieces around where some Pieces represent Drinking again. I plucked those Pieces off the Chess Board, and threw them away. It's quite satisfying. The Mental Turmoil dissipates this way - along with benefits from Aging - and takes with it any urge to Drink. RIP MoFo AV. Returning to Drinking is a long-dead Option; a nice, self-sustaining point to have reached >2 Years in. If/when I need the rare reminder, I pop over to the Main Boards here.
You can't lust after that which you no longer want. Zen 101...
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