NeedHelp282

Thank you all for the very thoughtful posts and stories. I hear what many of you are saying about moderation. It does sound like a lot of work (i.e. what's the point of just having 2?). There are other times, though, when one or two beers is all I need/want. But there is always the potential that I lose control, and I do need to be honest with myself. Maybe I came here because I want a dose of some brutal honesty. If I told most of my family and friends that I'm thinking about quitting drinking altogether, they will say "o you just need to cut back." For a part of me, that is exactly what I want to hear. I feel that another part of me wants to hear the exact opposite, like what many of your replies say: that "cutting back" just doesn't cut it. I've taken breaks from booze before, and during those times I felt great and had no problem attending events like weddings without having a drop. Nonetheless, there is always the "fear of missing out," that somehow convinces me that it's okay to have a few drinks "this time." 95% of the time, there is no problem. It is the 5% of the time when I do embarrassing/terrible things that is the problem. And on top of that, what used to be just hangovers are now 1-2 days of insomnia, night sweats, and severe anxiety/depression that I am just sick of dealing with.

When I think about it rationally, I know I'm not missing out on anything by not drinking. In fact, I am missing out when I am a complete zombie (like yesterday, when I posted this thread) for 1-2 days.

Long story short, I think you have all told me what I really needed to hear, and I'm going to stay away from the bottle for a while. I'm not ready to say that it's "forever" (not yet at least), but I do need to take a break for now.

Thanks again to everyone for your kind words of wisdom and sobering advice.

ALinNS

My concern and I fully realize we are not the same is I and many others have been down this path and out of concern and caring we share our stories, in the end it's your decision.

In 1996 I herd the exact words your friends told you from my wife at the time, my employer and my friends, Andrew you do not have a problem, just cut back and I did......for a time. If I were to have been honest with myself and looked inside I would have seen the problem clearly, due to a lack of education and caring in this sickness I did not do that.

In 1998 just two years later I found myself working in West Africa for a Cdn company and my drinking was totally out of control, I was flown home, to the ER and then Detox, I knew inside I had a problem, a serious one. My employer gave me 6 months off with full pay to get help, I took the six months but never followed their instructions because I was of the opinion I could do it myself, and once again my wife at the time agreed, exactly what I wanted to hear, not what I needed to be hearing.

The grief, loss, hurt I caused people over the years could easily fill a book.

My goal in sobriety is to give people who ask for help some things and resources to think about and then leave it to them to decide as that is all we can do, Care, Support and offer our experiences.

Wishing you the best

Andrew

juppe

Awesome post! I never really thought about it but you're right, I don't regret a minute of my sobriety either. I'm sure no one else at SR does either!