Quit in anonymity, secularly, and digitally?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2015
Posts: 7
Quit in anonymity, secularly, and digitally?
Hi all,
I'm new here, though I've been lurking for about 2-3 years. I don't want to get too much into the backstory of it all, but I'm 25 and been drinking heavily since I was 20. It has since spiraled way out of control, as it does, to the point that every evening I need 8-10 oz. of liquor to make me feel comfortable "falling asleep"—if you could even call it sleep. In 2015, I've gone 4 days straight without drinking 3 times. Small wins for me. Withdrawal symptoms were isolated to irritation and night sweats. Each time it felt f*cking great. Can't wait to do it again. Permanently.
No one knows about my addiction, besides my partner who turns his head. No resentment there... I more than get it. Admitting it to him and becoming abstinent is going to be the hardest obstacle in this journey. My friends won't bat an eye. My family is too ignorant, it's not even a concern.
I need to start the process of recovery, but first I'd really love some advice on doing so through online channels, sponsors, etc. I hope one day soon to take it offline into the "real world," but the initiation of the recovery simply needs to be through digital, secular, and anonymous means. This is non-negotiable for me. It's my first step and I've tried other means that have made me feel uncomfortable.
So, my question is: What forums and resources would you suggest for something like this?
I'm new here, though I've been lurking for about 2-3 years. I don't want to get too much into the backstory of it all, but I'm 25 and been drinking heavily since I was 20. It has since spiraled way out of control, as it does, to the point that every evening I need 8-10 oz. of liquor to make me feel comfortable "falling asleep"—if you could even call it sleep. In 2015, I've gone 4 days straight without drinking 3 times. Small wins for me. Withdrawal symptoms were isolated to irritation and night sweats. Each time it felt f*cking great. Can't wait to do it again. Permanently.
No one knows about my addiction, besides my partner who turns his head. No resentment there... I more than get it. Admitting it to him and becoming abstinent is going to be the hardest obstacle in this journey. My friends won't bat an eye. My family is too ignorant, it's not even a concern.
I need to start the process of recovery, but first I'd really love some advice on doing so through online channels, sponsors, etc. I hope one day soon to take it offline into the "real world," but the initiation of the recovery simply needs to be through digital, secular, and anonymous means. This is non-negotiable for me. It's my first step and I've tried other means that have made me feel uncomfortable.
So, my question is: What forums and resources would you suggest for something like this?
Behold the power of NO
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: WA
Posts: 7,764
Welcome to the forum. You might want to check out this section of Soberrecovery
Secular Connections - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information
Secular Connections - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information
Behold the power of NO
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: WA
Posts: 7,764
Also check out those links that Soberwolf put together. Those will get you started.
You can do it, you are not alone anymore
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ful-links.html
You can do it, you are not alone anymore
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ful-links.html
Marchia in Aeternum
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Georgia
Posts: 11,094
This is not a " digital, secular, and anonymous" project. If you're going to stop, you do it by whatever means necessary.
There's no clean, clinical way. Whatever it takes. Adopt Buddhism, Take Christ, Eschew Ofuscation. WHATEVER IT TAKES.
If you don't?
You gonna die.
There's no clean, clinical way. Whatever it takes. Adopt Buddhism, Take Christ, Eschew Ofuscation. WHATEVER IT TAKES.
If you don't?
You gonna die.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2015
Posts: 7
Originally Posted by trachemys 
This is not a " digital, secular, and anonymous" project. If you're going to stop, you do it by whatever means necessary.
There's no clean, clinical way. Whatever it takes. Adopt Buddhism, Take Christ, Eschew Ofuscation. WHATEVER IT TAKES.
If you don't?
You gonna die.
There's no clean, clinical way. Whatever it takes. Adopt Buddhism, Take Christ, Eschew Ofuscation. WHATEVER IT TAKES.
If you don't?
You gonna die.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,456
Hi Amy
I'll be surprised if you can't find some kindred souls here for whatever path you're looking for.
I know for a fact you'll find support in any case, even from people who may think differently about methods etc
welcome aboard!
D
I'll be surprised if you can't find some kindred souls here for whatever path you're looking for.
I know for a fact you'll find support in any case, even from people who may think differently about methods etc
welcome aboard!
D
Member
Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: Earth
Posts: 607
Hello Amy,
You can do this. Whether you use the path of others, blaze your own path or some combination of both is up to you. The important thing is you are taking the first step. I just suck in as much info as possible and use what makes sense to me and discard what doesn't. Check the links already provide and see what clicks. Ultimately the most important thing is really having the desire to get clean.
Good Luck!
You can do this. Whether you use the path of others, blaze your own path or some combination of both is up to you. The important thing is you are taking the first step. I just suck in as much info as possible and use what makes sense to me and discard what doesn't. Check the links already provide and see what clicks. Ultimately the most important thing is really having the desire to get clean.
Good Luck!
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Pacific Coast
Posts: 785
digital, secular, and anonymous?
That's basically how I've done it. Seems to have been working for me for... huh, I just checked on one of those sobriety calculator thingies, and it's 999 days! I'll have to make a "1,000 days" post tomorrow.
The point I'd like to make, however, is that in my experience, setting limits on what you're willing to do to get sober (especially bolded, underlined, italicized, non-negotiable limits) rarely works out well. For me, it was essential that I approach the challenge with a completely open mind. I had to admit that my old ways of thinking weren't working so well anymore, and I had to be willing to adopt totally new ones. That meant giving consideration to approaches that took me out of my mental comfort zone.
It took me 7-1/2 years from the point I decided I really had to sober up until I actually did it. I spent most of that time dabbling on the edges of recovery but never really committing myself because I was wasting my energy trying to fashion the perfect personalized program that didn't challenge my fears or offend my rational sensibilities.
Like the author Richard Bach said, "if you argue for your limitations, sure enough they're yours."
Welcome to the posting side of SR, and best of luck on your journey!
That's basically how I've done it. Seems to have been working for me for... huh, I just checked on one of those sobriety calculator thingies, and it's 999 days! I'll have to make a "1,000 days" post tomorrow.
The point I'd like to make, however, is that in my experience, setting limits on what you're willing to do to get sober (especially bolded, underlined, italicized, non-negotiable limits) rarely works out well. For me, it was essential that I approach the challenge with a completely open mind. I had to admit that my old ways of thinking weren't working so well anymore, and I had to be willing to adopt totally new ones. That meant giving consideration to approaches that took me out of my mental comfort zone.
It took me 7-1/2 years from the point I decided I really had to sober up until I actually did it. I spent most of that time dabbling on the edges of recovery but never really committing myself because I was wasting my energy trying to fashion the perfect personalized program that didn't challenge my fears or offend my rational sensibilities.
Like the author Richard Bach said, "if you argue for your limitations, sure enough they're yours."
Welcome to the posting side of SR, and best of luck on your journey!
Member
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Sweden
Posts: 1,649
I remember a time when I did not want any kind of group dynamic in recovery. If you don't feel ready for that, have you looked for an addictions therapist?
I have used lots of different methods and I had an addictions therapist for almost three years. However by that time I had also started using AA.
There are lots and lots of options for recovery. You have set some conditions for recovery, thats okay, but please don't let those conditions prevent you from finding help! Good luck!
I have used lots of different methods and I had an addictions therapist for almost three years. However by that time I had also started using AA.
There are lots and lots of options for recovery. You have set some conditions for recovery, thats okay, but please don't let those conditions prevent you from finding help! Good luck!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: Central Texas
Posts: 1,501
This is basically how I've done it and so far I'm doing well. Ultimately I think everyone has to take responsibility for their own recovery for it to work. There will most likely be some relapses or failures on this journey, but if you keep working at it , ultimately you will succeed. The important thing is to learn from mistakes and if quitting digitally and anonymously doesn't work then you will need to find additional support.
I wish you the best!
I wish you the best!
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