One day won't hurt, right?
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Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: MN
Posts: 8,704
One day won't hurt, right?
The "your buddy's coming over, its time to watch football and get drunk" voice ordering me around a little bit. Trying to rationalize that one day is not going to derail me and send me spiraling out of control. So I'm posting this BEFORE any damage is done. I think a good meal will satisfy me just as much.
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Join Date: Nov 2012
Posts: 302
I've been there before, the "social drinking with a friend" might be one of the hardest challenges for me. I used to cave in a lot, but I started to realize after the sports event was over and my friends would go home I would always feel guilty. When I finally got used to just riding the urge (which I would find strangely disappeared for me after turning down a beer or two), I noticed that I would feel stronger instead of guilty and ashamed.
I read your posts here thomas so I know you've got this, I have no doubt about it. I just wanted to share my similar experience with this because its what I find to be most challenging.
I read your posts here thomas so I know you've got this, I have no doubt about it. I just wanted to share my similar experience with this because its what I find to be most challenging.
I know you can do it too Jeff.
Why not tell that person that you quit drinking? If he is just a drinking buddy, he might cancel but it is really no big loss...your sobriety is so much more precious than a few hours spent "bonding" with a pal.
If he is a friend, he will still come over and be supportive. There are no rules which say that guys have to get drunk while watching football.
SR has its own football thread, I know plenty of guys in AA who won't miss a game. I watched the past 2 super bowls (the Hawks where playing) while sipping coffee.
I am glad you recognized your AV's nonsense and posted here.
Why not tell that person that you quit drinking? If he is just a drinking buddy, he might cancel but it is really no big loss...your sobriety is so much more precious than a few hours spent "bonding" with a pal.
If he is a friend, he will still come over and be supportive. There are no rules which say that guys have to get drunk while watching football.
SR has its own football thread, I know plenty of guys in AA who won't miss a game. I watched the past 2 super bowls (the Hawks where playing) while sipping coffee.
I am glad you recognized your AV's nonsense and posted here.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: MN
Posts: 8,704
I know you can do it too Jeff.
Why not tell that person that you quit drinking? If he is just a drinking buddy, he might cancel but it is really no big loss...your sobriety is so much more precious than a few hours spent "bonding" with a pal.
If he is a friend, he will still come over and be supportive. There are no rules which say that guys have to get drunk while watching football.
SR has its own football thread, I know plenty of guys in AA who won't miss a game. I watched the past 2 super bowls (the Hawks where playing) while sipping coffee.
I am glad you recognized your AV's nonsense and posted here.
Why not tell that person that you quit drinking? If he is just a drinking buddy, he might cancel but it is really no big loss...your sobriety is so much more precious than a few hours spent "bonding" with a pal.
If he is a friend, he will still come over and be supportive. There are no rules which say that guys have to get drunk while watching football.
SR has its own football thread, I know plenty of guys in AA who won't miss a game. I watched the past 2 super bowls (the Hawks where playing) while sipping coffee.
I am glad you recognized your AV's nonsense and posted here.
Regarding my friend, he'll bring a 12 pack of some fancy beer and he'll drink it. I'm not worried about him, I'm worried about me. Think I'll run up to the fancy supermarket and buy a couple trays of sushi as a treat for myself. I'll PM soberwolf, he'll know where the NFL link is.
I think that this is it, Jeff:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...light=Football
Great job posting here.
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...light=Football
Great job posting here.
quat
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: terra (mostly)firma
Posts: 4,823
Only one entity thinks it's "no big deal, a simple one off" and simultaneously holds the idea that that small thing is important enough to do. Convoluted AV logic(oxymoron), annoying when it crops up, but easily dismissed ,yeah? It is a big deal and so avoidable. Enjoy the sushi
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: MN
Posts: 8,704
I think that this is it, Jeff:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...light=Football
Great job posting here.
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...light=Football
Great job posting here.
You've got much more sober time than I, but as someone back at day 2, you don't want to be back here! That thought that one day won't hurt then I'll get back on track got me into this mess. The problem is, that first day was fine! I had one and done. Then the next weekend the same, but two. I didn't even want more than that! I thought I had it controlled now. Fast forward a couple more weeks, and I was in yet another blackout. It's a trap! Don't go for it. Good luck to you
Good for you for reaching out, Jeff. How's it going?
My recommendation is to stay close to SR. That kind of prolonged exposure to drinking, especially during an activity with which you've associated it, can cause some lingering impact.
My recommendation is to stay close to SR. That kind of prolonged exposure to drinking, especially during an activity with which you've associated it, can cause some lingering impact.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: MN
Posts: 8,704
Hi Venecia, its going well. I'm going through a life change so I have some emotional days. I'm also dealing with aging parents who have their own issues and I am the oldest so feel a responsibility to make sure they are ok and don't do anything stupid. I am giving myself 60 days to digest the end of one chapter in my life and start a new one. Then its "go time". Let me know regarding my PM. I think it would be a good thing for both of us? Mrs. Thomas11 thinks its great to get together.
Yeah, always good to see a fellow SRer. Check your PMs -- had a thought about where we could catch up.
I sure hear you re: aging parents. Spent today with my mother. Trying to get some paperwork pulled together as it looks like we've got her house sold. (Fingers crossed big time -- the closing date is all set but the last we heard, the buyer's still got some financing issues. I pray that is all resolved within the next week.) Took Mom shopping at a nearby Wal-Mart. Stopped to look at something and the next thing I knew, she disappeared. Had management looking for her and spent the next 15 minutes in a panic. She hasn't been diagnosed with dementia but she is a little "off" from time to time and her balance is poor. Found her ... she was happily looking around at items.
I sure hear you re: aging parents. Spent today with my mother. Trying to get some paperwork pulled together as it looks like we've got her house sold. (Fingers crossed big time -- the closing date is all set but the last we heard, the buyer's still got some financing issues. I pray that is all resolved within the next week.) Took Mom shopping at a nearby Wal-Mart. Stopped to look at something and the next thing I knew, she disappeared. Had management looking for her and spent the next 15 minutes in a panic. She hasn't been diagnosed with dementia but she is a little "off" from time to time and her balance is poor. Found her ... she was happily looking around at items.
Yes, aging parents.. sigh.. I understand the stress. They want to remain independent.
My mom flew on her own to Portland from San Francisco, at age 90, because my brother was really ill, and we couldn't find her for almost 24 hours! I had the airlines and PDX airport police involved. Flew up there with pictures and finally located her at an airport hotel, safe and sound. She'd had a good time but that was the last big adventure.
My mom flew on her own to Portland from San Francisco, at age 90, because my brother was really ill, and we couldn't find her for almost 24 hours! I had the airlines and PDX airport police involved. Flew up there with pictures and finally located her at an airport hotel, safe and sound. She'd had a good time but that was the last big adventure.
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