escapist

Life is so scary sometimes. Whenever I find myself feeling trapped and hopeless , I start drinking. My biggest client of 14 years has cut back and I have lost their business. I am terrified of my future. I don't know what is going to happen or if I will even be able to stay in business. It is a lot of money. When I think about it I can't breathe for a second. Then I gasp for air. This is prime time for a drink. Isn't that a kick in my pants ?
My sober date is October 15, 2012. Has it been 3 years? Really? I was so sick when I found this internet community. I am still sober . I have not had a drink since the day I joined. I have to stay strong. I will never drink again for as long as I live.
Thanks for reading this. I am scared out of my mind right now. I know the sure way to make it worse would be to get drunk. I just want to stop feeling scared.

jeneffer27

Hello escapist. Awesome job on 3 years of sobriety!!!👍👍👍 although I can not relate to your current situation specifically, I can definitely understand the feeling of worry, stress and concern and wanting to make it all go away with a drink. I've been down that road thousands of times. I know you already know this, but I'm going to say it anyway. Taking that first drink will only add to your current problem and make matters SO MUCH WORSE. Which will inevitably lead to more drinking. You know the vicious cycle I'm talking about. Play the tape in your mind all the way to the end! Look at the outcome of you to turning to alcohol to ease your stress, we both know how the story ends. Its a difficult situation you are in, no doubt. But stay strong in your recovery. You have come so far!! Alcohol has never and will never fix a problem. It only makes it 100 times worse. Sending hugs and positive thoughts your way!!

Dee74

Congratulations escapist - 3 years is awesome.

Getting sober on its own didn't really help me with my fears - but it gave me a kind of emotional level from which I could access that fear and deal with it in healthy ways.

I don't know much about business at all, and I know even less about what business you're in...but I'm sure you've lost clients before - every business does - and I'm sure you gained some too.

With a little proactive work and energy could you eventually make up the revenue shortfall - even of it took a couple of new clients?

D

PurpleKnight

You can get through this!! 3 Years is fantastic, keep pushing through!!

Soberwolf

3 years is amazing stick close to SR if you ever want to chat feel free to send a msg

SoberLeigh

Congratulations on three years of sobriety, escapist; well done!!!!

I am sorry that you are struggling with your business. Is there an association for the type of business that you operate or the industry you are in; maybe they could provide some resources for finding new clients or an additional service or product which you could offer or provide?

Hope things look better soon.

MidnightBlue

HI, Escapist!

I wonder - how's that your sobriety date now is October 15? We used to be sober twins and my is October 14?

Anyway, I so hear you about being scared to the point when it's hard to breathe.

I've been having some major financial issues, and though now things are straightening out bit by bit. I am still sick of fear. I've started having panic attacks - actually, trying to curb one of the now.

Good for you that you don't drink. You are absolutely right - whatever bad is going on, drink will just make it 1000 worse.

Fear...It sucks out more life that death itself.

Maybe, try to imagine, that there is no tomorrow. No such a thing at all. Then take a deep breath and do what you can do today. Easier said than done, but give it a try. There's no tomorrow, and consequently, no horrible scenarios. And now you are here, writing and reading post at SR. And you are safe.

Hugs to you.

Your (still whatever date confusions) sober twin.

MB

Anna

Hi Escapist, It's okay to feel scared when you know you're business is in jeopardy. Try taking some simple deep breaths to get through those moments, and then hopefully you can begin to work on a business plan.

Congratulations on 3 years sober.

sugarbear1

Stay strong and stay stopped! We can't see the future, but I am certain things will turn around soon!

thomas11

Hi Escapist, congratulations on your 3 years. I will share my story of losing business. When the crash of 2008 hit, it didn't really hit me here in the midwest until 2009. I lost $141,000 of income in 75 days (that was a lot of money for the size of my business), and I was actively drinking. The panic and fear were unbearable. But there was a positive that came out of it. It forced me out of my comfort zone and we got into other aspects of the industry. I learned things I would have never learned if that had not happened. Out of necessity, I broadened my skill set. I'm not sure if that's possible in your situation, but I can tell you from experience, drinking through it or because of it, is not the way to go. I wish you the very best. We are capable of doing so much more than we think we are if pushed hard enough.