Do you tell people you are in recovery?
Do you tell people you are in recovery?
So, do you ever feel compelled to tell people (select) you are in recovery? Who do you tell, how big is the flag you waive?
I have told a close co-worker and of course close family.
I am in recovery, finally : )
I have told a close co-worker and of course close family.
I am in recovery, finally : )
Sober since October
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: In the world in my eyes...Somewhere I've never been before...
Posts: 7,355
Hi, Itstheone.
I think it pretty much varies from person to person.
I was a closet wino, so no one knew I had a problem. Thus I don't feel compelled to tell a long story to people why I decided to stop wining completely.
I am not waiving a flag at all, I think. Just something like that:
- No thanks.
- ? I remember you liked red wine.
- Yes, I used to. But I feel much better without it.
And the last is absolutely true.
End of story.
But, that's me)
I think it pretty much varies from person to person.
I was a closet wino, so no one knew I had a problem. Thus I don't feel compelled to tell a long story to people why I decided to stop wining completely.
I am not waiving a flag at all, I think. Just something like that:
- No thanks.
- ? I remember you liked red wine.
- Yes, I used to. But I feel much better without it.
And the last is absolutely true.
End of story.
But, that's me)
I told my wife and most of my immediate family, as well as my doctor. Other than that I see no reason to at all. I have told some people that I don't drink anymore, but not specifically that I am in recovery or an alcoholic. I see no reason to as it's a personal goal of mine.
I've told close friends and family. Mostly because I know it's going to help keep me sober and I really want to this time. If I tell the people I used to drink with they're going to say something if they see me drinking.
I really want to stay sober.
I really want to stay sober.
My immediate family knew already and ive told my Dr
I would choose not to tell my employer and co-workers as ive seen it go wrong for a lot of others but its up to the person ive heard good understanding from others too
I would choose not to tell my employer and co-workers as ive seen it go wrong for a lot of others but its up to the person ive heard good understanding from others too
Teebee. Your last sentence. See you drinking? Are you not in recovery yet? That's ok if not, it takes time and it's not a simple as not drinking which why I failed time and time again...
Ryan
Ryan
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: C.C. Ma.
Posts: 3,697
In the beginning I told almost no one because of my many failed attempts. As time went on most of my friends were in the program and of course knew.
In the last 25 years I might tell anyone and at times it surprises me how many others are, as I live in a tourist area with many visitors who sometimes want info where the meetings are.
Obviously it’s a personal choice.
On the other hand if your in AA it might be a good idea to withhold this info from outside family members because we may be watched by some who need recovery. If we relapse they many thing “see it doesn’t work.”
JMO
BE WELL
In the last 25 years I might tell anyone and at times it surprises me how many others are, as I live in a tourist area with many visitors who sometimes want info where the meetings are.
Obviously it’s a personal choice.
On the other hand if your in AA it might be a good idea to withhold this info from outside family members because we may be watched by some who need recovery. If we relapse they many thing “see it doesn’t work.”
JMO
BE WELL
I've told a few people that I quit drinking. I don't use terms like "alcoholic" and "recovering".
People who knew me well enough to know that this was long overdue don't need an explanation. Those who don't know me that well just say "oh, good for you."
People who knew me well enough to know that this was long overdue don't need an explanation. Those who don't know me that well just say "oh, good for you."
I do not feel compelled to tell anyone, just as any personal choice it's really no ones business but mine. Although, I have chosen to tell a handful of people so in my weak moments I would have a support system to keep me from drinking! For other people I find a simple "I don't drink" to be sufficient, and when people ask why I promptly respond with "I want to be healthy, so I have cut out alcohol from my diet". Simple, no baggage, nonjudgmental of people who do drink, and irrefutable!!
Close friends, immediate family, and others in recovery. And only if it comes up. I have no reason to share it with anyone else, and learned a lot about who NOT to share it with in my first few years sober. I told people at work, and at school when I began college - and it came back to me in negative ways in both instances. I also learned a lot in the first 2 years about the principles behind anonymity, but they apply only to those in AA. I respect those principles and traditions because they're in place for the protection of AA. That part has little to do with me.
I find it's often more difficult, more character building, and even more honorable to remain anonymous - than to tell people I'm in recovery. For me. And it's got nothing to do with shame, as some people believe. It has more to do with pride, actually. It's easy to want to tell the world how great we're doing .
I find it's often more difficult, more character building, and even more honorable to remain anonymous - than to tell people I'm in recovery. For me. And it's got nothing to do with shame, as some people believe. It has more to do with pride, actually. It's easy to want to tell the world how great we're doing .
I've told my husband, but that is it.
I am very careful in who I tell that I've gotten sober since there is a lot of judgement with admitting to be an alcoholic. My family is extremely judgemental of alcoholics and other disorders to where it would work against me and my recovery.
I am very careful in who I tell that I've gotten sober since there is a lot of judgement with admitting to be an alcoholic. My family is extremely judgemental of alcoholics and other disorders to where it would work against me and my recovery.
I am actually pretty open about the fact that I am in recovery.. My family knows, my girlfriend knows, and even my employer is aware. I certainly dont go out advertising but I dont keep it a secret either.
I will be telling my friends the weekend ! Depends on the individual. I wouldn't at work, but my friends I will as I know they will keep getting me to drink when we go away together this weekend!
I go away Friday and will be going to my AA meeting Thursday night to realign and focus as I know it will be tough, but it will not blow 6 months!
I go away Friday and will be going to my AA meeting Thursday night to realign and focus as I know it will be tough, but it will not blow 6 months!
My husband and children know. I told a best friend of 40 years because I drew away from her so much during my drinking time and I knew she would understand. I told another close friend because she kept bugging me about why I wouldn't go to the bar with her anymore and well that didn't go very well. Anyway, didn't mean to get off the subject.
My husband and children who had to deal with me when I was drunk and 2 friends, that's it.
I won't tell the rest of my family (aunt, cousins) or work people. I tell other family members I don't drink anymore because it was affecting my health (true) and work doesn't need to know.
My husband and children who had to deal with me when I was drunk and 2 friends, that's it.
I won't tell the rest of my family (aunt, cousins) or work people. I tell other family members I don't drink anymore because it was affecting my health (true) and work doesn't need to know.
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