darcal

I'm curious if being sober from some substance addiction or issues is very important for those people who has. What is the best way to do to convince yourself or other people to get sober.

Dee74

Hi darcal - I moved your thread to Newcomers forum for more responses.

I'm not sure what the best way to convince yourself is (I'm not sure you could convince anyone unless they wanted to be convinced).

For me, I nearly died. I didn't want to die, so I changed my life.
It was that simple for me - not easy, but simple.

Looking at some of your other threads - I don;t know whether you're an alcoholic or not but you're drinking a condsiderable amount...and yes I do think you need to stop drinking if you want any real change to happen.

Do you plan on seeing a Dr about detox - it might be a very good idea?
D

least

For me, it started when I put the drink down for good. When I accepted that I could never drink again. When drinking was no longer an option.

Then I was able to stop drinking for good.

Nonsensical

I've never tried to convince anyone to get sober that wasn't already talking about starting a sober life. People in this forum, for example, might be having anxiety and doubts and I will try to convince them to stay on the sober path, but I don't recall ever trying to convince someone who wasn't looking for help.

I personally became convinced that I needed to find a better way when the negative consequences of my drinking reached my threshold for pain. The misery drinking was inflicting on me outweighed the meager benefits it was providing. Once I became sober I realized those meager benefits were even less than I realized. I found better ways to achieve the things I had relied upon alcohol to provide.

FeelingGreat

darcal, it's an interesting question and everyone approaches it differently. For some, the damage to their relationships is too great, others face work problems, Dee has already written about being close to death.

I hadn't caused much collateral damage (yet) so I spent some time reading up about
alcoholic progression. Luckily some part of my personality rejected the idea of becoming a stage 2 alcoholic, with people worrying about me, avoiding or feeling sorry for me.

If you're looking for motivation don't just focus on now, but try to picture yourself in 2 year's time. Is that what you want?

Once you've been sober for an extended period the rewards help keep you on track.

Notmyrealname

For me, after awhile I just couldn't ignore the overwhelming evidence that drinking was my biggest problem. The evidence mounted up over the years, and I like to think of myself as not an idiot. To keep drinking in the face of overwhelming evidence that I would be better off without would have been a pretty conflicted position.

Hawks

Not drink alcohol

IOAA2

Hi.
For me it came down to being honest with myself about my drinking and accepting the fact I can not drink alcohol in safety one day at a time in a row.

BE WELL

JT0626

In my case, I had gained a LOT of weight because of my alcohol problem. It got to the point where I hate my body & hate myself for making my body the way it is. It was a vicious cycle. The more hate I spewed on myself for drinking, the more it made me drink. So I decided that the vicious cycle had to stop somewhere & it starts with me.

trachemys

I'm like Dee in that fear of death motivated me. You stop drinking by...wait for it...stopping drinking. Had I not, I have no doubt my parents would have had to bury me last year.

Fly N Buy

I can only comment about alcoholics.....MOST never even try to stop let alone recover.

When we see, hear or do this - it is truly miraculous. People by nature do not want to change. Especially the really bad habits.

IMO, divine intervention is the cause. Recognized or not....
Convincing yourself is achieving a level of self realization of what we have become and the hope of a better life.

Convincing another drunk, is done by attraction - not promotion many times. You get sober, another see that and wants it too......Or a life changing event occurs.

Sometimes loved ones expression of concern can push people who have been thinking about sobriety towards recovery as well. Ultimately, it takes acceptance, willingness and desire regardless of who we speak of...


FlyN

darcal

Yes, but I'm afraid for the results. Yeah I think you're right I have to stop drinking. By the thank you for moving my post and for the tips.

darcal

Nice quotes. I can't do it I don't why. But when I already read all the replies of my post. I think I have to do it for my own good. Thank you guys.

MelindaFlowers

I had to be brought to me knees literally and figuratively. I was desperate. I was willing to do anything to stop drinking.

Brought to knees:

Daily withdrawal I could no longer handle
Failing health
Crippling depression
Hopelessness
Physically sick ALL THE TIME whether drinking or not
Alcohol stopped giving me a buzz so it wasn't doing anything but make me sick. ZERO enjoyment.

I checked in here every single day and spent about 3 to 4 hours reading and posting every day. I indulged in every treat, candy, soda I wanted for the first month. Nothing was off the table. Once I had nachos for breakfast because I felt like it.

I went very easy on myself and spent a lot of time napping or lying in bed with my iPad.

I didn't say I was quitting forever. Forever was too overwhelming. Just for today. Although I will never drink again.

And yes, I completely 100% accepted that alcohol was no longer working for me and I could never drink again. The "maybe someday" thoughts were dead and gone. Dead and gone.

I used to go back-and-forth about whether I should stop or how I should stop or when I would stop. Not anymore.

I also wanted to add that I was a working professional during all the nightly drinking and I excelled at work. That's why addiction is so weird. We can still put on a façade of being okay when we are falling apart.

darcal

I feel some of that problem with my body. Thank you for all the supports and now I have to do it. No more lies, I have to be brave for all the consequences because I'm the one who do it.

anattaboy

I found a lot of holes in sober living until drunk living nearly killed me. I had to believe things would get better even if I couldn't see it. Other folks' posts helped me. Some in AA say "let the group believe in you until you can believe in yourself". Sounds reasonable.