silentrun

I grew up in a "high mind control religion". I go to another recovery website to help overcome that. There are certain methods that are used and it is all designed to squash your critical thinking skills and turn you into an obedient unquestioning follower. People in cults do not know they are in one. The whole idea is to shut the world out and create your own reality. They genuinely believe they are doing the right thing.
There is something called the BITE method. Behavior/Information/Thought/Emotional control. In a group like that you are not welcome or will be "lovingly disciplined" through counseling or shunning if you do not conform.
So the question is do you HAVE you conform to a rigid set of behavior, what you can read, what thoughts you are allowed to have and how you must feel about it? I have seen SOME AA is the only way of that on here. They are recovering addicts so over-the-top behavior isn't that surprising. Not everyone conforms though. I have had conversations with people that I had no idea were in AA. They are sober and so am I and we respect that about each other. They haven't tried to proselytize anyone.
If you find yourself in a cultish group go find another meeting. If you need face to face support go out and get it.

Db1105

I think our Preamble says it all:


Alcoholics Anonymous is a fellowship of men and women who share their experience, strength and hope with each other that they may solve their common problem and help others to recover from alcoholism.
The only requirement for membership is a desire to stop drinking. There are no dues or fees for A.A. membership; we are self- supporting through our own contributions. A.A. is not allied with any sect, denomination, politics, organization or institution; does not wish to engage in any controversy, neither endorses nor opposes any causes. Our primary purpose is to stay sober and help other alcoholics to achieve sobriety.
Copyright © The AA Grapevine, Inc. Reprinted with permission

soberlicious

I do not think it's anything like secret handshakes or robes in candlelit rooms, but to think that it is not possible for abuses to occur is disingenuous. I've been to hundreds of meetings in different areas, on and off over a 20ish year period. The very vulnerable newcomer can be open to some abuses. This is not a fault necessarily of AA as a program, but rather of the whole group dynamic. People in a vulnerable state can, and have from my first hand knowledge, been told to go off medications, been asked to borrow money, been 13 stepped, and been ridiculed openly for questioning, been subjected to harmful psychoanalysis from unqualified sponsors, had sponsors begin to control parts of their personal lives. I've seen people do things because someone in AA told them to, and they feared relapse so much that they trusted implicitly.

My advice to a newcomer would not be to avoid it if they wish to go. My advice to them is to be openminded, but not naive. Watch what people do, not just what they say. If something feels very wrong to you, don't ignore that.

oldsoul1122

Looking at the big picture, there are so many different types of meetings. Some may have a cult mentality and some not. The same goes with individuals at the meetings and how they think. I have 2 neighbors who attend the same church. The one is quiet and unassuming and the other preaches every chance he can get and boasts about attacking even strangers out in public about how wrong their religion is and how he is right.

Soberpotamus

There and checks and balances all throughout the program literature. Of course there are zealots in the program and I've met some. Not very attractive. Lol. However, I think you get out of it exactly what you want/need, and you can give back accordingly. I didn't experience it as a "cult" but there were aspects I did experience as huge turn-offs. To each her own. Live and let live.

Grungehead

Cults rely heavily on strict rules of conformity. In that regard AA is the opposite -- it is closer to anarchism than a cult in that there are no leaders or rules, just a bunch of drunks trying to help each other stay sober. The only steadfast rule I know of in AA is that the requirement for membership is a desire to stop drinking. Everything else about the program is only suggestive and members are free to do as they see fit.

I do agree that there are members who might be "extremists", but as others have stated that can be seen in most organizations. Finding a way out of the alcoholic hell many have experienced can make one very passionate about the program. I think at times this exuberance often catches a newcomer off guard and may give them a negative first impression about AA.

RobbyRobot

People from all kinds and walks of life have been attending AA since its earliest beginnings in 1935 and our members now count in the millions. With these numbers it makes sense to at least check some meetings out for yourself and with an open-minded appreciation, you'll be best able to come to your own understanding based on first-hand experience.

It is not surprising how much variance is in play between meetings, and even within any one meeting as well. When we realize those who have a desire to quit drinking can be anybody who wants to quit, this easily accounts for all the diversity across the board. And since AA operates in the open, and is simplistically organized, its also commonly known to attract some self-appointed leaders who do create some unfortunate dynamics and obstacles to the newcomer. Even so, such power plays are rampant in bars and drinking parties, where drunks are bred and born, so its not so surprising such nonsense is also played out in AA.

As others have already said, I agree it is possible to get screwed around within AA. A roomful of drunks, yeah? Anyways, all official meetings fall under the responsibility of their respective district offices, and this offers a sure way to air any and all grievances. That being said, AA is an imperfect organization, and like all social-related gatherings, the better purposes can become somewhat undiscovered by newcomers if they have a few bad experiences. It happens.

Feel free to call your local district office, usually described as the local AA Intergroup. Numbers for your area are found online and in the phonebook.

I've had great success in AA for decades now. So have many, many others. I hope it works for you too, and if not, there are plenty of opportunities for alternatives nowadays, so no worries.

Whatever gives you the results your needing from whatever is what will work best for you, and this can only be discovered by first-hand experience.

FreeOwl

some are, some aren't.... maybe it depends on your own interpretation of 'cult like".

My experience has been that AA is a great resource in my sobriety and a source of great insight, strength and personal growth as a human being.

I work my own program, I'm open to learn and grow, and I take what resonates with me and observe the rest with an open mind.

It's helped me stay sober for nearly 10 months, made me some really genuine friends and taught me a lot.

Nuudawn

For me...and I only speak of both my initial issues and my eventual acceptance. I tried AA a couple of times...unsuccessfully. Previously, it was my impression that I had to "swallow it whole" and I simply couldn't do that. I just couldn't. It seemed I came across to many smug smiles and wry chuckles when I questioned anything.....
I might have surrendered the battle with alcohol..
But I hadn't surrendered my wits and common sense...
Sometimes I felt I was supposed to...

For me, I have to "take what I need and leave the rest". I checked a good number of meetings..and I found one where I fit. I feel blessed that I did.
I found a community within my homegroup. I committed to that group..that meeting...once a week. I have connections within that little group..people I feel comfortable should I need to reach out. I feel like I have found some folks who care about me...and my sobriety. And I about them..and theirs. There is tremendous spirituality in ...community.
I look forward to the Tuesday night meeting. It is a wonderful part of my recovery plan.
I found what I need in AA...and I'm grateful for it.

As others have said, check it out. Sober connections are so very, very helpful.

Low

No, it is not a CULT.

Tamerua

I heard a speaker once address this and say, if it is a cult, it is the worst run cult in the world.

afloatsober

Honestly don't think that alcoholics in recovery would tolerate a cult .
What usually happens when you tell an alcoholic what to do?..... LOL
It has it's fair share of zealots and control freaks, but even they have to temper their excesses at times.
It is founded upon love and healing and hope.
Long may it be an option for those that want out.
G

FreeOwl

The more I think about this... The more I realize that actually; alcohol is a cult.

Thomasthetank

I've been to AA and no, I just saw a group of people helping each other improve their lives.

Thomasthetank

There's not? Me turning up in a gold dressing gown, clicking twice then shaking their hand upside down must have seemed very odd.

What a fool I've been.

Rence

I was raised catholic. I went to a catholic grammar school, high school and college. I loast my religion quite a few years ago and I am now atheist. The God that AA refers to, for me, is Group Of Drunks - the people of AA. There are religious people in AA, and I totally respect their beliefs. There are atheists and agnostics in AA too. You will find what you need. The AA community is the best group of people I have ever met. People may seem to be in a cult-like euphoria to some people, but that's because they are just glad as all hell to be free of the grips of alcohol that squeezed the life out of them for many years. AA has helped me regain the person I once was before being destroyed by alcohol. Go to a meeting everyday for a month and you tell us if you think it's a cult.

Chilledice

I personally wouldn't say AA is a cult, go along and see if it works for you, if it does GREAT if it doesn't well then find something else

If it works it darn well works

FormerDrunkGuy

Thank you for the information and reply's. It gives me a lot of information to chew on for now. Thanks for putting up with the new guy and his questions.

bigsombrero

I understand what you mean - but I think you might be just having a knee-jerk reaction. AA isn't for everybody. Not for me, in fact. But hey, there are a lot of activities that aren't for me. Ever meet those folks who absolutely NEED to do yoga all the time? Or those motorcycle fanatics that can't get enough of motorcycle clubs, events, etc? Or what about those people that just HAVE to go to the gym, every darn night? What is with those people??? Anyway, those aren't really "cults", those are just extreme hobbies. And sure, some of the AA crowd gets really involved! As others have mentioned, it's really filled a hole for some ex-drinkers and they plan socially around the organization and make it a big part of their lives. We alcoholics are often addictive people by nature - it's only realistic to assume that some AA members might really latch on. But for the vast majority, it's just a stepping stone. That's what it was for me, anyway.

As another member pointed out: there isn't a membership fee. You can go just once, listen, and never walk in again. You can go once a month just for the coffee. Or, you don't have to go at all! I myself don't gravitate for AA, but if I ever relapse or am struggling, it's nice to know there's a church basement in just about every major city in the world that will open it's doors and pat me on the back. A lot of folks got sober with the help of that organization. I used to knock it, but I'm done slinging mud. Whatever works to help someone find a life outside of drinking alcohol is fine by me.