Just nice to know I'm not alone.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Alaska
Posts: 276
Just nice to know I'm not alone.
Hello there. I am married to a recovering heroin addict who's been on a Suboxone program for the past...almost 3 years now. He's also still working on overcoming a lifetime's worth of absolutely abysmal treatment by his family, ex-wife & ex-girlfriend.
Some days I look at him & think, "Wow. You're actually far more normal, healthy & proactive than you have any right to be."
Other days (like today), when something goes "wrong" or there's a setback, or I'm just tired & not handling things well, I think, "Oh, my god. This is NOT what I signed up for. Why can't you just STRAIGHTEN UP??"
Joined here because it's nice to just know I'm not alone, other people are fighting these battles with their loved ones, etc.
This morning's battle involves going out to say goodbye to the dog, & finding a near-empty 5th of cheap vodka hidden in the dog kennel. We've had many discussions already, about how I am not here to judge or humiliate my husband, & I would rather he start working on overcoming his ineffectual coping tools (hiding things, lying, getting defensive) & learn to communicate with me better.
He keeps saying he wants to wean off Suboxone entirely, but even going off his medication schedule by a few hours produces cold sweats, anxiety, bad temper, etc. I know he despises being "dependent" on it, but it has been the only thing that's worked in his favor in his search for treatment & he's just not ready yet-which his doctor has said.
Our first child will be born in November. We're extremely excited, & yet I still find myself wondering if getting pregnant was a good idea.
Sorry for the extremtly disjointed ramble.
Thanks for readin!
Some days I look at him & think, "Wow. You're actually far more normal, healthy & proactive than you have any right to be."
Other days (like today), when something goes "wrong" or there's a setback, or I'm just tired & not handling things well, I think, "Oh, my god. This is NOT what I signed up for. Why can't you just STRAIGHTEN UP??"
Joined here because it's nice to just know I'm not alone, other people are fighting these battles with their loved ones, etc.
This morning's battle involves going out to say goodbye to the dog, & finding a near-empty 5th of cheap vodka hidden in the dog kennel. We've had many discussions already, about how I am not here to judge or humiliate my husband, & I would rather he start working on overcoming his ineffectual coping tools (hiding things, lying, getting defensive) & learn to communicate with me better.
He keeps saying he wants to wean off Suboxone entirely, but even going off his medication schedule by a few hours produces cold sweats, anxiety, bad temper, etc. I know he despises being "dependent" on it, but it has been the only thing that's worked in his favor in his search for treatment & he's just not ready yet-which his doctor has said.
Our first child will be born in November. We're extremely excited, & yet I still find myself wondering if getting pregnant was a good idea.
Sorry for the extremtly disjointed ramble.
Thanks for readin!
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,784
Welcome to the family. 
It seems as if he's depending on alcohol the same way he used to depend on heroin. I hope he can stop drinking and get off the suboxone before your baby is born. 
Do give our friends and family forums a look. Lots of good advice there.
It seems as if he's depending on alcohol the same way he used to depend on heroin. I hope he can stop drinking and get off the suboxone before your baby is born. Do give our friends and family forums a look. Lots of good advice there.
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