goldenroses

Clementina and TempeBrenn, sounds like we are all in the same boat here!

The catch 22 of drinking because of anxiety/depression and then feeling even more anxious and depressed because of the drinking....really starting to wear on me! I had a drink last night after feeling pretty awful and useless for most of the day which I am now feeling guilty about doing. I'm still feeling pretty anxious today plus really exhausted even though I got plenty of sleep last night. I just want to wake up in the morning and feel good-mentally and physically.

Hevyn

It's good to meet you goldenroses.

I felt the way you do once long ago, but I didn't take action. I continued to try and manage my drinking so I wouldn't have to let go of it. I refused to admit that the fun it used to be was never coming back. I had grown dependent on it - and was drinking every day. I'm so glad you see what needs to happen - there is life after alcohol. You will be free of it and the anxiety will leave you. You have so much to look forward to!

Needinghelp82

My anxiety is through the roof but there is relief in being sober. You can rationalise thoughts and focus on getting better.

Hang in there

goldenroses

Sounds exactly like the place I am at. Thinking "oh, you can manage this/as long as you're not binging every night I guess it's ok/maybe you should only drink when tomorrow is a day off" etc. You know where that's got me? Wasting almost every one of my days off because I binged the night before, and also feeling anxious/sick at work for a couple days after...then I start to feel a bit better after a few days right when...you guessed it..it's time for another day off, so hey you had a long week maybe you should have a drink!

I've spent a lot of time kidding myself into thinking this was a phase or that maybe I indeed did have an off switch-I can drink like a "normal" person. Taking a good honest look at myself has forced me to realize that I don't, and I, at this time, cannot drink like a normal person. This habit has done nothing for me but drain my $$ and my health, yet I find a way to rationalize every single time. A few hours of putting all the stress on pause isn't worth the horrible feeling that carries on for days afterwards.

Hevyn

It means to kill us golden. We don't need it in our lives - it's just a lie we've told ourselves. What was once fun and relaxing ended up ruling my life - I went on like that for 30 years. This doesn't have to happen to you.

Hereandnow2

Golden the first 2 weeks were the hardest physically and then the emotional stuff too but 30 days I started to see a light at the end if the tunnel. Meetings really helped me early on along with my sponsor.