Drunk girl living in my home
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: London
Posts: 4
Drunk girl living in my home
Hello,
I hope that anyone could read my message within few hours and give me some advice because I need to make a quick decision. I'm renting a house on my own that has a spare guest room. According to my contract I'm not allow to sublet, but I can have guests like friends and family, which can give me cash to pay bills and help with my rent if they want to stay in the spare room.
I work in one of the best strip clubs in London, the environment is very professional considering other clubs and the type of industry. I'm only working there temporarily because it's good money and it helps me for the moment to open my own business. I'm spiritual and I have very good ethical values, so I don't usually make friends in this environment because you cannot trust strippers or customers for many reasons.
Although, I had one Romanian girl that needed a place to stay, so I offered her my spare room for some cash for few weeks. She turned out to be a very good girl. She paid me on time every week, she was honest, friendly, respectful, she never got drunk and she was cool until the last day when she went back to Romania.
Later, I met an English girl at work that seemed to be very nice to me, she told me that she was looking for a place to stay because she didn't like her hostel. So, I offered her my spare room. I thought that she was going to be reliable like the Romanian girl... (I remember that once we went for a dance with two guys, the guy paying gave her 40, but gave me only 20, I asked him for another 20 to be equal but he said that he gave her only 20 and she lied and said that she only got 20). Anyway, It was too quick and I was confused, but I didn't trust her since. She kept on smiling and being nice to me, so after few weeks I forgot about it and we became 'work friends'.
Getting to the point... the day she moved in she was late, she really liked the house, my cats were very friendly to her, but she didn't have any cash. So, she told me that she needed to go to the cash machine and she was waiting for my answer expecting me to be too kind to say don't worry give it to me later, but I said to her politely 'ok go to the cash machine'. She came back with half of the money we agreed and said she didn't have more money just then because she just had her lips done (cosmetic surgery). I had to go to work, so I told her to give me the rest tomorrow. Next day I had to wake up earlier and as soon as she heard my alarm clock, she went to the bathroom, got ready in less than ten minutes and left for the day. I was still in bed and I didn't have the chance to see her to give me the rest of the money.
So, I expected to see her at work in the evening. She went to work to another club (she is actually no supposed to work in two clubs at the same time, but it's not my business). I sent her a message but no reply. I had a guts feeling and didn't feel comfortable with her staying in my rented home. Thinking about it, I lost my mobile in the club (hopefully I will get it back if the cleaners find it). I told this story to another girl and she told me that she is just abusing my kindness. When I got back home, she wasn't there, which is not normal because the other club closes earlier. I had to contact my mobile provider to block it, so I still didn't go to bed when she got home... She was very drunk, but gave me just a little bit of money... because she was drunk I couldn't keep on asking her for more, but to be honest she could just pay the two weeks she wanted to stay without having to chase her note by note.
I told her I lost my phone, therefore I asked her for her number, but she was ignoring me and she went to sleep with the door open. Also, she still didn't add me on facebook, her privacy settings are so high that you cannot add her, only sent her a message which I did but she didn't add me.
Anyway, after I talked to my other friend we thought that it was fair to give her all the money back, don't charge her for the two nights but kick her out when she gets up. She is stressing me out and I don't like drunk people, specially in my home with my cats. I told her so and that I don't drink, but she lied to me saying she does not get drunk. I'm so upset that she abused my goodwill, I offered her a nice place to stay for not much money considering living well in London with no much money is very hard.
I cannot go to sleep because I'm anxious to think that she will get up leave the house before I have the chance to tell her to pack her things and go, get my keys and give her the money back. Should I keep some money for the two nights? Or shall I give her everything back? I just don't want any drama. She will be upset, but I don't want her in my home because she gets drunk, lies and pays me note by note. Also, we don't have much in common.
I'm going to the shops and then I will see how I'm going face this situation. I think I may just tell her to go because I don't want drunk people in my home and I don't like chasing people for money note by note, etc.
I hope that anyone could read my message within few hours and give me some advice because I need to make a quick decision. I'm renting a house on my own that has a spare guest room. According to my contract I'm not allow to sublet, but I can have guests like friends and family, which can give me cash to pay bills and help with my rent if they want to stay in the spare room.
I work in one of the best strip clubs in London, the environment is very professional considering other clubs and the type of industry. I'm only working there temporarily because it's good money and it helps me for the moment to open my own business. I'm spiritual and I have very good ethical values, so I don't usually make friends in this environment because you cannot trust strippers or customers for many reasons.
Although, I had one Romanian girl that needed a place to stay, so I offered her my spare room for some cash for few weeks. She turned out to be a very good girl. She paid me on time every week, she was honest, friendly, respectful, she never got drunk and she was cool until the last day when she went back to Romania.
Later, I met an English girl at work that seemed to be very nice to me, she told me that she was looking for a place to stay because she didn't like her hostel. So, I offered her my spare room. I thought that she was going to be reliable like the Romanian girl... (I remember that once we went for a dance with two guys, the guy paying gave her 40, but gave me only 20, I asked him for another 20 to be equal but he said that he gave her only 20 and she lied and said that she only got 20). Anyway, It was too quick and I was confused, but I didn't trust her since. She kept on smiling and being nice to me, so after few weeks I forgot about it and we became 'work friends'.
Getting to the point... the day she moved in she was late, she really liked the house, my cats were very friendly to her, but she didn't have any cash. So, she told me that she needed to go to the cash machine and she was waiting for my answer expecting me to be too kind to say don't worry give it to me later, but I said to her politely 'ok go to the cash machine'. She came back with half of the money we agreed and said she didn't have more money just then because she just had her lips done (cosmetic surgery). I had to go to work, so I told her to give me the rest tomorrow. Next day I had to wake up earlier and as soon as she heard my alarm clock, she went to the bathroom, got ready in less than ten minutes and left for the day. I was still in bed and I didn't have the chance to see her to give me the rest of the money.
So, I expected to see her at work in the evening. She went to work to another club (she is actually no supposed to work in two clubs at the same time, but it's not my business). I sent her a message but no reply. I had a guts feeling and didn't feel comfortable with her staying in my rented home. Thinking about it, I lost my mobile in the club (hopefully I will get it back if the cleaners find it). I told this story to another girl and she told me that she is just abusing my kindness. When I got back home, she wasn't there, which is not normal because the other club closes earlier. I had to contact my mobile provider to block it, so I still didn't go to bed when she got home... She was very drunk, but gave me just a little bit of money... because she was drunk I couldn't keep on asking her for more, but to be honest she could just pay the two weeks she wanted to stay without having to chase her note by note.
I told her I lost my phone, therefore I asked her for her number, but she was ignoring me and she went to sleep with the door open. Also, she still didn't add me on facebook, her privacy settings are so high that you cannot add her, only sent her a message which I did but she didn't add me.
Anyway, after I talked to my other friend we thought that it was fair to give her all the money back, don't charge her for the two nights but kick her out when she gets up. She is stressing me out and I don't like drunk people, specially in my home with my cats. I told her so and that I don't drink, but she lied to me saying she does not get drunk. I'm so upset that she abused my goodwill, I offered her a nice place to stay for not much money considering living well in London with no much money is very hard.
I cannot go to sleep because I'm anxious to think that she will get up leave the house before I have the chance to tell her to pack her things and go, get my keys and give her the money back. Should I keep some money for the two nights? Or shall I give her everything back? I just don't want any drama. She will be upset, but I don't want her in my home because she gets drunk, lies and pays me note by note. Also, we don't have much in common.
I'm going to the shops and then I will see how I'm going face this situation. I think I may just tell her to go because I don't want drunk people in my home and I don't like chasing people for money note by note, etc.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Ireland
Posts: 25,826
Hey Kindhearts!! Welcome to the Forum!! 
Yeap it's time to cut her loose, it sounds like she is indeed taking advantage, as you say she's stressing you out in your own home, she's the guest in all of this.
Time to sit her down and explain the situation that she can't stay anymore and reclaim your sanity back!!
Yeap it's time to cut her loose, it sounds like she is indeed taking advantage, as you say she's stressing you out in your own home, she's the guest in all of this.
Time to sit her down and explain the situation that she can't stay anymore and reclaim your sanity back!!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: London
Posts: 4
Well, some strippers get really drunk and unfortunately I have been unlucky to get one of them without knowing it... and probably she went off with some guy to come back home so late, which is not my business, but I rather to have a nice girl like me at home. I just don't want any stress. If I would be a guest I would pay in full before moving in and I would not come back home drunk.
I would just give her few hours to sleep while I finish my duties. Then tell her to go, get the keys, pack her things, full cash back (I don't want grieve for 40 pounds for the two nights). I hate doing this, once she is gone I can have a nap and a new day.
I would just give her few hours to sleep while I finish my duties. Then tell her to go, get the keys, pack her things, full cash back (I don't want grieve for 40 pounds for the two nights). I hate doing this, once she is gone I can have a nap and a new day.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Ohio
Posts: 3,785
Originally Posted by Kindhearts 
If I would be a guest I would pay in full before moving in and I would not come back home drunk.
This goes for all people whether they have problems or not.
Not having these expectations make dealing with others easier. It also opens me up to say "this is what I thinking, what are you thinking?". It opens communication and gets everyone involved on the same page. That does not mean a plan can't change but at least there is a starting point and it keeps the door open for more communication down the road if needed.
If everything is expected or assumed without some type of confirmation, then anger and resentments are sure to come rolling in.
Originally Posted by Kindhearts
once she is gone I can have a nap and a new day.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: London
Posts: 4
GracieLou, I didn't understand your post, but I already made my decision. My guest room was all clean and now it smells of Whisky or Rum. I'm not having drunk people at my home. I pay a lot of of money for this house, it's not fair, not tolerating it, so polite philosophical statements won't excuse her bad behaviour.
Rochele, I just needed to see other people's opinion, sorry if I didn't find the right forum but I just needed a quick advice and I found this website first. Even if she pays, I don't want bad behaviour.
Rochele, I just needed to see other people's opinion, sorry if I didn't find the right forum but I just needed a quick advice and I found this website first. Even if she pays, I don't want bad behaviour.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: London
Posts: 4
I will live on my own with my cats. Not all people at Church are saints... I heard from some christians that it's ok to commit sins all week long and then confess on Sunday, so Jesus will wash all you sins and then you are fine.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
