RylianH

Hey, so I'm 29 and from Coleraine, Northern Ireland (although currently living in Belfast and working up there). I've been sober for two full days. Just over two years ago, I realised the effect that alcohol was having on my life - I lost my job and my partner left me. In the year after that, I attended a support group and got counselling and went for months without drinking. In that time I studied counselling and managed to get a job working as a support assistant for adults with learning disabilities. I've just finished my first year in the position, something I'm intensely proud of.

However, during this time I moved to Belfast for work and started living with one of my best friends. He doesn't even drink, so I figured it would work well. It has in many ways, we get on well. However, I started to slip with booze occasionally about 8 months ago. We laughed it off at the start and I thought I would be okay. Of course, I was wrong.

The incidents started coming closer and closer. Of course, the lies started to come. "I'm just tired tonight", "I was only out for dinner", etc. Then it started to get worse. He had a wine rack in the kitchen. Four of those bottles ended up filled with water. It was only through restraint, shame and the fear of getting caught that I didn't drink the rest.

I feel he looks at me differently now, even though I have no doubt he cares deeply and doesn't know what to do to help. My family are also worried, for similar reasons. The thing is, I firmly believe I can do this and stop for good. I see my current situation as a trial and error process - finding the way for me to be happy and sober. Sometimes this process fails. The problem is when it does, it's not like smoking a cigarette after a two week hiatus - you end up getting caught, affecting everyone around you and being dropped into a hole which feels as if it gets bigger every time you slip.

This has brought me here. I realise now that I need to be around people who understand, who have similar thought processes and have experience on how to beat them. As well as hopefully helping others through shared experiences. Thanks.

Thepatman

Welcome!

I know the feeling of having to lie and hide my drinking. People worried etc.

I had to remove Alcohol from any option to deal with life.

Good luck and hope to see you often posting

least

Welcome back! I'm glad you're back trying again. Never give up!

PurpleKnight

Welcome to the Forum!! . . . I'm a Tyrone (N.Ireland) man myself and I can honestly say SR is an amazing place!!

You'll find loads of support and advice here, we're all coming from the same place!!

Nonsensical

Do we really need more recovering alcoholics here?



ABSOLUTELY!

Welcome!!!!!

RylianH

Ha, love it - it's Nonsensical! I read the first sentence without scrolling down and felt an involuntary shudder - thank goodness for the punchline!

Thanks Purpleknight - good to see another local here! Least, thanks for the return welcome And thanks Thepatman for throwing down the red carpet!

I've spent the past couple of hours reading through articles and getting excited because I can see the support is here if I want it. It's giving me the confidence to go back to Belfast tomorrow and sort it all out. It's all do-able - as long as I stay sober.