liss74

Picked up only so much I can take !

Chilledice

Whats up liss74? Wanna share?

Finnie

Put down again. The sooner the better.

All here can support and help.

This too shall pass

Shoshie8

Hi Liss, the GMT shift is up and here for you. You can put it down as quickly as you picked up.

Marcher13

Liss you picked up only an hour ago, why not put it down, tip it out and have something to eat?

Dee74

what do you mean only so much you can take, liss?

D

Randummy

Hey Liss,

What's up? If you can, post a reply and have a chat with us! I'm on GMT time and I'm not at a meeting till late this afternoon so I'll keep the forum open and participate as much as I can!

liss74

Everyone everything

Dee74

I'm sorry Liss.

I really hope you can find some way to deal with things without drinking, because drinking doesn't seem to be solving anything?

D

liss74

No it doesn't solve anything and I'm feeling it. I just can't take anymore abuse it's really hard. Went off Facebook to help myself and still get things thrown at me I'm to weak after this week then today couldn't take it. And who do I hurt after someone hurts me yep ME bloody crazy don't understand ???????

sugarbear1

have you considered rehab?

Chilledice

HUUUUUUUUUGE hugs to you.

HeadLump

And huge hugs from me, too, liss

GreenEggsAndHam

This is what it took for me and I didn't even think I was that bad, but I simply did not have the strength to not drink.

Please reach out for help where you live. I've seen your posts and always look forward to them. I think a network of people who support you and can help you would do wonders.

LadyinBC

This^^^

You will NOT find this support at the bottom of a bottle. I wish I could find a quote someone used here one time.

It went something like you have one problem, and next thing you know after taking a drink, you will end up having 10 problems to deal with after! ACCCCKKKKK I have to start saving these quotes some of them are epic.

You can do this Liss, you really can. You have the power to take yourself off this merry-go-round.

KateL

Sorry you are having such a hard time xxxx

Dee74

I really agree with the others here liss - you have to build up a network of support to help you in these hard times - and you have to use it, instead of returning to drinking.

Staying sober really is the only way to make positive changes to your life right now.

D

LadyBlue0527

liss, believe it or not the level of stress you feel when things occur is in direct relation to how badly you want to drink. It took me a while to figure that out.

In very early recovery I had the perfect storm of events happen that put me in exactly the same place that you were stress wise in this post. Not only was the stress level insane it happened to be the same day I was meeting up with a few friends at our favorite wings and beer place. An event occurred about 30 minutes before I was headed there after I got out of work and I remember thinking to myself how insane it was that I was even allowing myself to go there. I was in the white knuckle zone. Now that I look back on it I think it was partly the AV at work too, not that I didn't have a reason to be stressed but my want to drink multiplied the situation tenfold. How convenient.

I came here and posted. I let everyone know where my head was at and received an outpouring of support. As I sat in the foyer waiting for my friends, and read those posts, the strength and courage that I needed to get past it increased. This board and the people on it are amazing. I was surprised at how well seeking support works when you allow yourself to do it.

It works, but you have to come here before you pick up and not after. Every time that you do that it gets easier. You need to want to be sober more than you want to drink and the people here can help you with that, just give it a chance.

You CAN do this!

EndGameNYC

Hi Liss.

I've been following your struggles, and I'm sorry that life has been ganging up on you.

Whatever else people take away from my comments here, I'm always surprised when someone, anyone, gets sober, myself included. It's such a daunting struggle at first, and the rewards just don't seem real or even possible to achieve in the beginning. And then once we achieve sobriety and life gets better, some of us still think about drinking as a reasonable option, even long for it.

Something I've thought about recently is that if I'd found SR during my three-year relapse, I doubt that I would have been able to get sober with SR alone. I would've been one of those people who complained about my life, claimed to want to stop but did nothing to make that so, rejected suggestions from people here, and continued to bemoan my inability to stop drinking. I'd likely have used any support I got as a way to stay connected with the human race while I continued to drink 24/7. I'm not saying that any of this is true for you, and I do get it that some people seemed to have gotten sober by using SR alone. But that was not me.

I think the biggest thing that allowed me to dry out -- not get sober -- was that I could no longer function on my own. I barely dragged myself to detox, and my five days there were the best five days of my life for the three years leading up to it. I was not at all a candidate for do-it-yourself detox. Knocked out most of the time, and I was able to eat and sleep. When I was discharged, I was unsteady on my feet, all fogged up in my head, and had nothing to look forward to. I'd tell you that my heart was broken, but it was more like it was MIA. I then went to rehab because there was no place left for me to go, and I still couldn't adequately care for myself. As far as I could see, the world didn't care, and I was fine with that.

Now that I'm back sober for about two-and-a-half years, I can say with complete confidence that it was all worth it. I'd lost everything and everyone dear to me in life during my relapse, and I saw no way of crawling out of the mess I'd created, and rarely had any motivation to even try.

Now I use SR to read about people's struggles, to offer help and support when I can, and to remind myself just how bad everything was for me, and how hard we've all worked and continue working to make things better.

Sobriety, salvation, a better life are all available for you when you're ready, and even when you're not. Take a break from a life that's making you feel crazy, that doesn't allow you to trust yourself or anyone else. Surrender, rest, and heal. It's your time.

Coldfusion

For me, I needed a few days at in-patient detox, and that was enough. Maybe try detox before trying a longer-term rehab?