It's possible! I really am back
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2003
Location: Boston Mass
Posts: 20
It's possible! I really am back
Hello everyone, well what a wild and loooong sick ride its been, almost a year
since i last posted, once again i was tired and sick of being tired. This time my
alcoholism nearly killed me, i woke up a few days a go after a 78 hour binge i
couldnt open my eyes, i thought i was blind i was practically walking on all fours and had to report to work in a matter of hours i told my roomate i couldnt live like this anymore, bit the bullit and called my pcp who refered me to a alcohol specialist, well we decided on out-patient detox (because my insurance will not cover in-patient) and they have me on all types of medication, i can hardly move, dont leave the house, i try not to drive (thank god for my housemate or i would be dead) so far the shakes are not so bad but my mind keeps racing, is it the medication or is is the withdrawal, 7 years
of daily drinking except perhaps 8 days i stopped then back again and now it had gotten worse and worse, i feel sick most of the time, and afraid once this is over i might drink again, please any words of comfort or help would be very much appreciatted by anyone, specially those who i communicated with a year ago, (you know who you are)... god bless CALI
ps I dont want to drink anymore
since i last posted, once again i was tired and sick of being tired. This time my
alcoholism nearly killed me, i woke up a few days a go after a 78 hour binge i
couldnt open my eyes, i thought i was blind i was practically walking on all fours and had to report to work in a matter of hours i told my roomate i couldnt live like this anymore, bit the bullit and called my pcp who refered me to a alcohol specialist, well we decided on out-patient detox (because my insurance will not cover in-patient) and they have me on all types of medication, i can hardly move, dont leave the house, i try not to drive (thank god for my housemate or i would be dead) so far the shakes are not so bad but my mind keeps racing, is it the medication or is is the withdrawal, 7 years
of daily drinking except perhaps 8 days i stopped then back again and now it had gotten worse and worse, i feel sick most of the time, and afraid once this is over i might drink again, please any words of comfort or help would be very much appreciatted by anyone, specially those who i communicated with a year ago, (you know who you are)... god bless CALI
ps I dont want to drink anymore
Community Greeter
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: Mid-Life Express
Posts: 9,930
Hi Cali,
We have'nt met and I look forward to getting to know you. I am alcoholic/addict clean and sober for now and I know what you're saying. If I can help please message me.
A big welcome back too.
Indigo
We have'nt met and I look forward to getting to know you. I am alcoholic/addict clean and sober for now and I know what you're saying. If I can help please message me.
A big welcome back too.
Indigo
Choosing Life
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: London
Posts: 889
Hi Cali
JC here - alcoholic. Welcome (welcome back). Took me a very long time to accept my problem, now working hard to get things right, one day at a time. Looks like you are ready to put some work in. Well done. I'm already loving recovery.
much love
JC
JC here - alcoholic. Welcome (welcome back). Took me a very long time to accept my problem, now working hard to get things right, one day at a time. Looks like you are ready to put some work in. Well done. I'm already loving recovery.
much love
JC
spirit
Join Date: Sep 2003
Location: perth,western australia
Posts: 1,460
CALI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!
and it looks like you have moved, or am i gettin old and vague
SO GOOD TO SEE YOU HERE- THE BIGGEST HUGS FOR YOU
MUCH LOVE
KATH
and it looks like you have moved, or am i gettin old and vague
SO GOOD TO SEE YOU HERE- THE BIGGEST HUGS FOR YOU
MUCH LOVE
KATH
Member
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Life Is Short
Posts: 2,017
((((((Cali))))))
Hard typing this with tears girl. You know I always think of you, I even posted something about you on the Don't Quit thread a week or so ago, wondering how you've been. Wish I could stop your pain, wish so bad.
You don't have to drink anymore...look deeper within yourself and find the strength that's there to stop this UGLY DEMON
Happy you're back kiddo...YOU CAN BEAT THIS fight harder, don't let it win, that's what it wants.
Sending my love, extra hugs and prayers to you Cali, love you girl.
god bless CALI...ps. I don't want to drink anymore
Happy you're back kiddo...YOU CAN BEAT THIS fight harder, don't let it win, that's what it wants.
Sending my love, extra hugs and prayers to you Cali, love you girl.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2003
Location: Boston Mass
Posts: 20
Thank you all so much its been so long i forget some of your names but i have not forgotten ANY of you specially you OLD OLD TIMERS!! heh, heh, well i'm on day 5
my doctor is slowly taking me of the medication they are talking about putting me on some type of alcohol-blocker (does anyone know what thats about?) They said it's something like antibuse but NOT as harsh (whatever that means) i'm going to agree to it, anything that will help me STOP the cravings, this out-patiant detox seem's to be working i;m not as shaky, of course i'm on all types ot meds including lots of vitamins.
for years i tried it on my own and couldnt do it, so for all of you out there remember that there is help in detoxing out-patient, meaning you take your medication, you stay home, you follow through and oh yeah, you have to have someone with you 24/7 which i am lucky to have, i know i sound like i'm riding on a high horse, i know the hard
part is yet to come, (when i have to face reality without the help of medication) but like everyone keeps telling me ONE DAY AT A TIME... god bless you guys love, CALI
my doctor is slowly taking me of the medication they are talking about putting me on some type of alcohol-blocker (does anyone know what thats about?) They said it's something like antibuse but NOT as harsh (whatever that means) i'm going to agree to it, anything that will help me STOP the cravings, this out-patiant detox seem's to be working i;m not as shaky, of course i'm on all types ot meds including lots of vitamins.
for years i tried it on my own and couldnt do it, so for all of you out there remember that there is help in detoxing out-patient, meaning you take your medication, you stay home, you follow through and oh yeah, you have to have someone with you 24/7 which i am lucky to have, i know i sound like i'm riding on a high horse, i know the hard
part is yet to come, (when i have to face reality without the help of medication) but like everyone keeps telling me ONE DAY AT A TIME... god bless you guys love, CALI
Member
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: The Mohave Desert
Posts: 2,306
Hi Cali
Welcome back....my name is Kellie (alkie). :WAVE:
Five days.....super!
You already know what a great place SR is and I hope you will stick around and take advantage of all the support, love and understanding that goes on here. I know it is what is helping me to help myself to stay sober this time.
Welcome back....my name is Kellie (alkie). :WAVE:
Five days.....super!
You already know what a great place SR is and I hope you will stick around and take advantage of all the support, love and understanding that goes on here. I know it is what is helping me to help myself to stay sober this time.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2003
Location: Boston Mass
Posts: 20
Thank you all for the support, right now i'm so medicated that i'm not even craving alcohol, but the doctor is slowly decreasing the meds and thats when the hurting
starts, i hope i can do it, for some reason i believe that this is the end of something awful and the begining of a new clean and sober chapter in my life, theres so much i want to do so much i want to see and iv'e already wasted so many years. I dont know if i'm making sense to any of you but this is the way i feel. peace CALI
starts, i hope i can do it, for some reason i believe that this is the end of something awful and the begining of a new clean and sober chapter in my life, theres so much i want to do so much i want to see and iv'e already wasted so many years. I dont know if i'm making sense to any of you but this is the way i feel. peace CALI
Little Girl Found
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: North Andover, MA
Posts: 567
Hey Cali, you don't know me...I'm new--but I'm Danielle, alcoholic, and like everyone else I would like to welcome you home. 
For myself, it's a lot easier staying sober than getting sober, and as you already know--this too shall pass!
Hang in there!
For myself, it's a lot easier staying sober than getting sober, and as you already know--this too shall pass! Hang in there!
Paused
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Olive Branch, MS
Posts: 1
You're doing great!!
You don't know me...I'm new to this. I got scared myself this past weekend. If you don't mind my asking for your help and advice, what would you consider binge drinking...like what you did? I know that it's obviously a lot, and probably varies from person to person. I did something similar this past weekend. My husband and I stayed at the Embassy Suites hotel, and well, they have a two hour free cocktail reception. They keep refilling your glass, even when you don't ask for it. I already knew that I like alcohol way too much!! Ever since I developed panic and anxiety disorder. I must have had 3 or 4 big drinking glasses of Chardonnay in a row...they were out of the regular wine glasses. Well, something in me triggered...and I woke up in the middle of the night in vomit on the bathroom floor!! It scared me to death!! I can feel a bruise on the back of my head...That was 3 nights ago...I haven't quit either. I've slowed down...but afraid to go cold turkey...I went to an AA meeting tonight, and didn't like the atmosphere or the crowd.
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