Freshperspective14

Well it's officially been 24 hours since my last drink. Last night was easy as I was so busy wallowing in remorse, self-pity and tears that drinking more than I already had yesterday was the last thing on my mind. I worked all day today which helped distract my mind. But let me tell you, driving home from work all I could think about was the glass (okay, usually 5 or 6) of wine that I usually end my work day with. I am surviving minute by minute right now, and I'm certain that being here is the only thing keeping me from the fridge. I had a very honest discussion with my husband last night and he wants to support me in every possible way. I'm fortunate that he didn't respond negatively to some of the things that I confessed to him about my drinking...likely because he suspected far more than I knew. He hinted at emptying the house of all alcohol in order to help me. He rarely drinks and could care less if there was a drop in the house. So I'm sitting here wondering what I would find if I went and checked the fridge right now. I'm not sure whether I'm more panicked that the wine will be there, or that it won't. I have taken all of the advice offered so far to heart and will be seeing my doctor in 2 weeks...it's time to come clean with my health concerns and start working on taking care of my body. But damn, I am already having a hard time remembering why I was so desperate to seek help yesterday. So any help you can offer to get me through the night would be very appreciated...

Thepatman

I would recommend getting rid of all Alcohol in your house. Maybe for the first few months?

Glad your husband is supporting you and well done on making tuis life changing decision. Remember, baby steps is the best approach, one little day at a time

Carlotta

Hi Cruella
to the sober train. I can assure you that it will get better. The first three days are the most difficult but the longer you stay sober, the easier it gets and the cravings do go away.
I hope you will join us at the 24 hours club where we pledge not to drink or drug for the next 24 hours. Before you know it, those days do pile up http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...l-welcome.html
Right now, try to keep your mind busy and realize that any thoughts of picking up the first drink is only your addictive voice at work. You officially do not drink. Identify it and separate yourself from it. It wants to drink but you want to be sober. You are the one in charge and ultimately you are the one who can chose not to pick up that first drink.
Why don't you also check out the chat room? Meeting some friendly SR members will help you withstand the cravings.

safe2breathe

i agree.

gimliman

I am also in my first day of recovery and also from Barrie! Don't know how much help I could be, but I offer my support to you. I poured out all the booze I had this morning and I'm glad of it. Been drinking way too much for way too long (over 30 yrs) and worried, like you, about health. There has to be a better way to live life than in the fog of booze. Keep strong and believe in the power of your will and mind. You can do it. So can I.

least

Welcome Cruella and Gimliman.

I would suggest keeping busy in some way. I used to go to bed early cause I couldn't drink while I was sleeping.


Stay on SR a lot, read and post instead of drinking. Read our stories in the stories of recovery forum.


I'm glad you found us and joined the family.

KateL

Welocme, keep reading and posting. Take it easy and pamper yourself a bit x

Sinderos

Personally for me if there is alcohol in the house, I'll drink it. I highly recommend getting rid of it. I'm only 10 days out, but I can tell you I am already happy with my decision to better myself. Think of where you'll be in 5 years if you continue with the drinking. Chances are you won't have a lot of what you have now and will more than likely be drinking even more. Is it worth it? Hell no! Just stay strong and do it one moment at a time if it's necessary.

gatorgirl67

Glad your reaching out, Cruella...keep posting and take it one day at a time.

30yrdrunk

Hi Cruella,


Make a list of all of the awful things that have happened when you have been drinking. Also, make a list of all of the reasons you want to quit. Last, make a list of all the benefits of staying sober. Keep this list with you at all times. This should help when tempted.

Stay strong.

TC

MariahGayle

Glad you are posting here Cruella - I have 12 days today & this has been a great support for me here. Just take it a day at a time....the "relief" that comes with not drinking is SO worth those times we feel "uncomfortable" Keep close here;

Welcome to you too Gimlimin

Freshperspective14

It's bedtime, and I made it. I had a hot bath, and thought about my drinking. And something important struck me. I don't have to worry about all of the drinks I need to avoid in the future. Drinks 2 through 6,8,12 (whatever the magic number for the day is) are never of concern, whether I'm drinking or not. There is only one drink that I need to avoid...the first one. And guess what? I haven't checked the fridge in the basement yet to see if the wine is there. Maybe I didn't NEED to know, maybe I don't want to know the answer, at least for today. Maybe the day that I decide to look will be the day that I'm ready to throw it out on my own...all I know is that today is the first day in probably 5 years that I made the choice to NOT pour that first glass. Thank-you all for the support.

malcolmsloan

Welcome and good job Cruella. I also agree with removing the booze from the house for a while, too much fuel for the old Addict Voice. Getting throught this night is a victory. Rembemer how you feel now and in the morning and make these feelings part of your thinking when the next wave of cravings come-this is where you want to be, not where that drink would have lead you.
Welcome to the journey--all worth it.