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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 32
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Hi,
My story I guess similar to many of you...I am alcoholic. I hate myself so much for drinking. I would drink 2 or 3 days at the time. No food, no minimum sleep. Right now I have the worst hangover. I puke and have really bad exaety. I am so tired from all of this, tired from being so sick. I live alone, making good money and sooo lonely. Only few people know about my addiction. Its so embarrassing...I hate myself!!! My god I feel like throwing up. I dont want to drink anymore!!! Please help me, knowing that I am not alone will make my panic attack better. Thank you so much!!!
My story I guess similar to many of you...I am alcoholic. I hate myself so much for drinking. I would drink 2 or 3 days at the time. No food, no minimum sleep. Right now I have the worst hangover. I puke and have really bad exaety. I am so tired from all of this, tired from being so sick. I live alone, making good money and sooo lonely. Only few people know about my addiction. Its so embarrassing...I hate myself!!! My god I feel like throwing up. I dont want to drink anymore!!! Please help me, knowing that I am not alone will make my panic attack better. Thank you so much!!!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 8,637
you're not alone.
Can you get to an AA meeting?
Try not to hate yourself.... that's not going to help, it will only lead to more of the same.
You deserve Love... and even though you may not feel able to Love yourself right now, you can at least try to say, out loud, you DESERVE Love.
Then remind yourself.... THIS IS NOT YOURSELF. This is an addiction and it has a powerful hold on your mind. Starting here is a good step. Getting to a room full of people who truly understand is an even better one.
You don't have to keep doing the same thing....
Can you get to an AA meeting?
Try not to hate yourself.... that's not going to help, it will only lead to more of the same.
You deserve Love... and even though you may not feel able to Love yourself right now, you can at least try to say, out loud, you DESERVE Love.
Then remind yourself.... THIS IS NOT YOURSELF. This is an addiction and it has a powerful hold on your mind. Starting here is a good step. Getting to a room full of people who truly understand is an even better one.
You don't have to keep doing the same thing....
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Mid-Atlantic
Posts: 551
Welcome Tina! You are so not alone! Many of us have been exactly where you are (me--last July). The good news is that you never have to feel this way again! Stay close to this board and reach out for support whenever you need it! xo
Member
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: California
Posts: 2,643
You are not alone Tina. Instead of hating yourself, treat yourself as though you have the flu, try to sip some water and take it easy. Your body and mind needs some rest and relaxation right now, so give yourself a break and instead of reliving the regrets, pamper yourself and give yourself permission to do nothing today.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: South Texas
Posts: 211
Originally Posted by FreeOwl 
you're not alone.
Can you get to an AA meeting?
Try not to hate yourself.... that's not going to help, it will only lead to more of the same.
You deserve Love... and even though you may not feel able to Love yourself right now, you can at least try to say, out loud, you DESERVE Love.
Then remind yourself.... THIS IS NOT YOURSELF. This is an addiction and it has a powerful hold on your mind. Starting here is a good step. Getting to a room full of people who truly understand is an even better one.
You don't have to keep doing the same thing....
Can you get to an AA meeting?
Try not to hate yourself.... that's not going to help, it will only lead to more of the same.
You deserve Love... and even though you may not feel able to Love yourself right now, you can at least try to say, out loud, you DESERVE Love.
Then remind yourself.... THIS IS NOT YOURSELF. This is an addiction and it has a powerful hold on your mind. Starting here is a good step. Getting to a room full of people who truly understand is an even better one.
You don't have to keep doing the same thing....
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,569
Welcome Tina! All the misery will pass and you can have a brand new start. We all understand what you're going through. You never have to feel lonely - you have all of us. Glad you are here and wanting to make this big change. 
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 32
Thank you so so much for respond!!! I feel a bit better but anxiety still there. I still shake really bad and I have to work tomorrow. I have to show my puffy face in front of people I care and who has no idea whats going on with me. I didnt drink for 7 month ( couple drinks now and than) so I know how wonderful it feels and I want that feeling back.
Member
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Northern Ireland
Posts: 450
Good to see you are feeling positive, just take it easy and focus on one day at a time, you will feel better better tomorrow because you aren't having any alcohol today and so you will start feeling better. Really agree with Free Owl AA is really a great place and I find it has helped me enormously. Keep posting we all want to see you get well xx
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 32
Thank you
I cant express how much I appriciet your support. I will get help, I cant do it on my own (till Dec31st I was in denyl that I can). 2 years ago I had lots of family problems, my father cut me off his life for almost a year cause I didnt get alone with my stepmother. So during holiday season I felt really lonely, so lonely I thought I had no reason to live. During this time I drank almost for a week 24 hrs a day. I was so sick physically and emotionally, I was in so much pain so I figured to not feel this pain I will cut myself and I did. Scariest day of my life, I ended up in a hostpital.I have scar on my arm as a reminder of that day. After that incident I promise to myself never ever to do this again. For 2 years I woukd drink but not as much as I used to ( 4 times a year compare to 15 to 20) I changed, felt so much happier and now felt again. 3 days of drinking about 10 cans(500ml) of beer a day. Im just affraid that one day my father said woman alcoholism is not curable. Please tell me he is wrong!!!!
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,445
Hi and welcome Tina 
while it's true there's no 'cure' for alcoholism, it's entirely possible for you to live a happy and full life, without alcohol.
Look around at the many examples of success here
There's no essential difference between female alcoholism and male alcoholism either. That's just not true IMO
D
while it's true there's no 'cure' for alcoholism, it's entirely possible for you to live a happy and full life, without alcohol.
Look around at the many examples of success here
There's no essential difference between female alcoholism and male alcoholism either. That's just not true IMO
D
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