Twinings

I went to my brothers for dinner...
He pulled out this jar of sloe gin he's made and asked me to smell it.
I declined and he practically forced it up my nose...
I took a sniff... actually thought the smell was horrible!

Then he asked if I was going to drink some at xmas... I said no and he kept pushing... well why not just a couple for the taste... and then we got into a debate about how I could just drink a couple of beers and not go wild.
For a split second I thought maybe I could until I told my AV to shut the hell up and turned and said to my brother, no! just no!

I'm coming up two weeks since my relapse and I have no intentions to drink ever!

Johnston

Funny, I was at a Christmas party tonight and my bosses boss asked me to taste her wine because it tasted weird to her and she wanted my opinion. I politely declined.

Hawkeye13

Great news Twinings!

Glad things are going well for you.
This time you've got it I think . . .

Twinings

Sheesh I hope so!!! I'm in a good place right now. I don't want to be back in hell.

KateL

Well done both of you. People just don't get it, do they?

Dollyangel17

Way to send the AV packing!! Nice work. Keep it up, you are doing great:-)

bigsombrero

Sounds like your brother's a jerk. That is totally inappropriate behavior on his part and is downright nasty. There is no place for that. It's like pushing a handicapped person out of their wheelchair and asking them if they want to race.

Glad you passed this "test". But this was not a test that you should have had to take. I would stay away from people like that in the future. Tell your brother that kind of thing is absolutely off limits.

Thepatman

I think you both needed that test. I can guarantee it boosted your confidence and you are now prepared for a possible next time.

It's not like you can hide under a rock to avoid people that drink, specially familly

Twinings

In his defence I was a secret drinker and he doesn't know I have a problem.
He can be a jerk but for other reasons lol

Twinings

Yeah maybe your right. It did feel good to come away and not feel tempted.
I don't actually avoid alcohol that much... i've been in a bar and round a friends who were drinking it doesn't bother me cus I sat at home alone and drank and isolated. I've spoke before about my social anxiety and it's something i'm really working on so i'm getting out as much as possible...whether thats around alcohol or not, it feels good just to get out and do it.

anyistoomuch

i am just over 40 days in and dont feel like i should give advice, but i think you should let people know you are a non drinker and dont drink under any circumstances. I told everyone in my life that i stopped, and if they asked why (most didn't except my old drinking buddies), i told them that it was affecting my health so i found life easier without it. of course, people who know me well pushed for more info, and then i would tell them i found myself drinking like an alcoholic and it was affecting my life, so easiest thing for me to do was stop. thats it.

i refuse to be ashamed of having this problem with alcohol. it's a hard enough condition to handle without having to hide it from people. screw them if they judge me for it, and eff them if they try to push booze on me

hiddenzebra

Glad you're doing ok. I also drank in isolation; many of my friends/family may not realize what a problem with alcohol I've actually got. Preparing myself for their pestering to have a drink is something I've been working on.

malcolmsloan

Hey, Twinings, I totally relate to being a "secret drinker" and having confrontations with people who just do not not know. When I experience this, they seem to mean no harm because they think they are talking with a normal drinker. I had a very similar experience with family members about a week ago. I also recently told a close friend (who doesn't know the extent of my problem) that I had quit drinking. He said, "oh, that's cool. When you feel better, we'll go get a pint." I/we have to remember that they don't understand. Good for you for shutting down the AV, these are tough situations. You did well. Onward!

Twinings

I have told people I don't drink any more. They are unaware of my relapses this year and think I've been pretty much sober most the year. I can't come clean about my secret drinking and the extent I was drinking for a couple of reasons. It will ruin relationships i've been working on and I have been honest in the past when I went to detox, that was when my drinking became secret. Everyone thought I 'recovered' after the detox. I don't much care for what AA says about being honest and what not as I'm not following that program. I'm moving forward, the past is the past and i'd rather keep it secret and keep my family. Just reinforce with them that i'm not a drinker any more when situations like this arise.