My Councillor said I was not alcohol dependent.....
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2012
Posts: 458
My Councillor said I was not alcohol dependent.....
And guess what here I am again!!!!
I made it to 91 days, had a meeting with my alcohol and drugs councillor and she said it's clear your not alcohol dependent if you can go 90 days.
My AV celebrated those few words and I tested myself again in August.
A bottle of wine, one day a week for two weeks, moved on to my choice of drink Bacardi n vodka the next week. Works night out controlled my drinking, nothing bad happened so that was it, I could drink as when I liked, probably only had two sober evenings of a week.
10 weeks later I had enough.
My last drink was on 2nd Nov and I've been fine all week but feeling tested today and already fighting with AV about drinking tonight.
I don't know what I can or will do different this time
I made it to 91 days, had a meeting with my alcohol and drugs councillor and she said it's clear your not alcohol dependent if you can go 90 days.
My AV celebrated those few words and I tested myself again in August.
A bottle of wine, one day a week for two weeks, moved on to my choice of drink Bacardi n vodka the next week. Works night out controlled my drinking, nothing bad happened so that was it, I could drink as when I liked, probably only had two sober evenings of a week.
10 weeks later I had enough.
My last drink was on 2nd Nov and I've been fine all week but feeling tested today and already fighting with AV about drinking tonight.
I don't know what I can or will do different this time
One Day At A Time
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: UK
Posts: 561
My therapist for my eating disorder speculated he thought i wasn't an alcoholic, that all my chaotic behaviours were because of my low self esteem and depression. My alcoholic brain latched onto that and i used it to justify a relapse. There is no doubt on this earth that i am an alcoholic, but used one throw away comment to justify it. On day three now and going to see my doctor today.
I believe you know yourself if you have a problem with alcohol or not. True to form it is cunning, baffling, powerful and patient.
Well done on getting back into sobriety. I wish you well on your journey
I believe you know yourself if you have a problem with alcohol or not. True to form it is cunning, baffling, powerful and patient.
Well done on getting back into sobriety. I wish you well on your journey
Better when never is never
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Wisconsin near Twin Cities
Posts: 1,745
Sounds like the councilor is a bit on the incompetent side.
It's not about whether you can go without it. It is all about the link between drinking and the problems it causes in our life. That is the main thing I am focusing on now. My drinking caused severe problems in my life, and abstinence is the only way I have been able to avoid those problems reoccurring.
Unfortunately, our cravings for alcohol are trumped only by our desire to get the golden "normal" stamp on our lives. I have to be on guard for that. Drinking alcoholically (the only way I know how) does not make me normal.
You can do this!
It's not about whether you can go without it. It is all about the link between drinking and the problems it causes in our life. That is the main thing I am focusing on now. My drinking caused severe problems in my life, and abstinence is the only way I have been able to avoid those problems reoccurring.
Unfortunately, our cravings for alcohol are trumped only by our desire to get the golden "normal" stamp on our lives. I have to be on guard for that. Drinking alcoholically (the only way I know how) does not make me normal.
You can do this!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Bklyn. NY
Posts: 1,859
Is there a chance that you misunderstood your counselor? That maybe she told you that at 91 days you're no longer dependent on alcohol? If that's not the case, then you need to find another counselor. I can't imagine a substance abuse counselor telling someone they don't have a problem if they can go 90 days. It makes 0 sense and that person should be fired.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2012
Posts: 458
I had been with her for nearly 10 months and she helped me no end with various issues but that last meeting she was very proud of where I was and how my life had turned around. I felt she was ready to close my case and asked where do I want to go from here. I said I'll make one more appointment a month later.
I cancelled that appointment as I thought I no longer needed the help and support after all in my head I was cured, I was not an alcoholic I was just depressed for a little while.
And for a few weeks I felt great, felt normal being able to get on with life without the burden of being an alcoholic.
Crazy I know!!
But it's strange how we quickly forget how bad things really were until we are there again.
I cancelled that appointment as I thought I no longer needed the help and support after all in my head I was cured, I was not an alcoholic I was just depressed for a little while.
And for a few weeks I felt great, felt normal being able to get on with life without the burden of being an alcoholic.
Crazy I know!!
But it's strange how we quickly forget how bad things really were until we are there again.
One Day At A Time
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: UK
Posts: 561
Yeah i call that my alcoholic amnesia. Its insane! I forget the trips to A and E, the withdrawals,.the pain it caused my family, missed opportunities and lost jobs...amongst others.
Just try again. Never give up x
Just try again. Never give up x
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,444
Hey Dorris
I wondered how you were - good to see you again.
Counsellors aren't infallible - noone is - and I think there are big changes made in those first 90 days - but if the first thing you want to do after hearing you're not alcohol dependent is to drink again, there's probably more going on than perhaps your counsellor realised....
I think you knew Dorris - but I understand why you ran with the idea.
Lesson learned, I guess?
D
I wondered how you were - good to see you again.
Counsellors aren't infallible - noone is - and I think there are big changes made in those first 90 days - but if the first thing you want to do after hearing you're not alcohol dependent is to drink again, there's probably more going on than perhaps your counsellor realised....
I think you knew Dorris - but I understand why you ran with the idea.
Lesson learned, I guess?
D
Member
Join Date: Nov 2013
Posts: 63
Dorris-thanks for this story! It's early days for me, but I feel like my alcohol problem is directly related to my depression and trying to blot that out. I've made a commitment to not drinking. Initially I was thinking that I'll not drink til I'm back on track mentally. But the fear of what it's done to me mentally makes it a nonsensical activity for me to partake in...EVER.
Keep on keeping on Doris. We'll all get there. Thanks for this lesson! xxx
Keep on keeping on Doris. We'll all get there. Thanks for this lesson! xxx
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