jaynie04

I have not been to any events like you described since I got sober. I know what my book club group was like....no way could I go to one now and stay sober. I am not sure if I could tell you the name of more than a few books we actually read.

To EndGame's point, my recovery is do or die, it really is, so everything else has to run second to that goal. It will never get easier to get sober, I have a stack of invites on the kitchen counter that I need to RSVP to, but I don't believe I am going to most of them this fall.

It is one season, maybe one year out of what I hope will be a long and healthy life. Everything I do now I run through a sober sieve in my mind. I have realized I am not a masochist, right now I do not have enough under my belt to feel resentful or tempted. The more time I put between myself and the bottle and the more I focus on my recovery the better shot I have. I think something that is a common feeling among us is "just this one time" and quick fix mentality. Getting sober means really changing the bones of our life, then the window dressing will fall into place.

If your book club is anything like my old book club I would urge you to really think this one through. I know you mentioned that things are difficult at home right now, is there any other trip you could take that wouldn't be so tempting?

ScottFromWI

Nothing anyone can say will make a definitive difference in another's sobriety, but each little piece of wisdom learned helps. Every day there's new people here and I am happy that there were a lot of others around to give me honest answers to my questions rather than dismissing me.

afloatsober

IMO Don't go.
Don't test yourself.
You may find that you are simply not strong enough yet.
Bookclub or alcoholic misery......
Any lengths.
Your call, how serious are you...............
G

lommey

Don't think I could cope this early on
Someone told me about putting an elastic band on your wrist and every time your av voice speaks you ping the elastic band . Don't know if it works but its bound to hurt if you ping it hard enough. lol
You've had lots of good advice here from everyone
stay safe stay sober

pinkdog

Hi Clemence, welcome. Keep your eyes on the prize. It will be a great accomplishment. Have a sober fun time.

pattyj

The big book says that we need to be around situations that contain alcohol because we are never going to be rid of alcohol in life. But that doesn't mean to test yourself in the first 12 days. I am at 5 months and still don't intend to test myself. It sucks to give up those fun things that you want to do with friends but this is a life or death situation. I most likely have another relapse in me but I do not think that I have another recovery in me. I tested myself so many times and I never stayed sober. Good luck in what you decide to do. I gave up a 6 year relationship, a beautiful house, and a bunch of friends just to stay sober. Some things have to go to save ourselves.

Clemence

Thank you everyone who posted the above concerned and caring advice. You were right and I was playing with fire going on a trip like that. It was really risky and probably foolish. But I did it. I went and I didn't drink. It was hard and I won't put myself in a position like that again for a long while. I just got home and want nothing more than a drink to reward myself for getting through it. Bedtime methinks!

HeadLump

A nice hot cup of cocoa would be apt reward, methinks!

But many, many congratulations on getting through this. Well done!

ReadyAtLast

good on you got not drinking clemence. at least you've learned something from the experience which is good. there have been many threads on here recently about people who had events to attend,were worried but didn't drink then drank when they got home as a reward for not drinking or because they were just so tired/wound up by it all. Sleep is probably a good idea

mecanix

Nice to see you back and posting Clemence,

Bestwishes, m

jaynie04

Congrats Clemence...wow, great job!! Welcome back!