Beanie25

Is counting days just an excuse to constantly put off tomorrow what we can achieve today?

deeker

Counting days proves if u can get through one you can get through the next

Beanie25

Mmm just seems like people get in to the mindset of 'well it's only one day extra, I will just start tomorrow..not much difference. It is like a get out clause IMH.

Beanie25

*IMO I mean.

gatorgirl67

I'm confused Life...do you mean counting days of sobriety or counting days until you intend to stop drinking? Or to keep waiting until tomorrow to quit?

Mentium

Well you can cast most things in a negative light if you choose to. I counted my first thirty days because each one felt like an achievement and each one took me a day further away from alcohol and active addiction and a day's worth of feeling better!

It was something to celebrate personally and something people here encouraged with messages of support as they always do.

deeker

But the only one it is hurting is you

Beanie25

Gatorgirl, like oh well.. I can reset tomorrow, and there will be people to say 'don't feel too bad, just start again..eventually you can just think 'yeah I will start again tomorrow' you either have to want to quit or not..not have everyone wiping your ass when quitting is constantly interrupted. That's all

ScottFromWI

I'm still not sure exactly what you are asking. Most people count days after they have quit to use it as a milestone or measure of their continued sobriety, not the days UNTIL they quit. Or am I missing something?

deeker

But who does it really affect, not us, You are the one that will continue to hurt, It shouldn't matter what anyone else thinks or says. People will continue to encourage you , they are not gonna say hey stupid why did u drink. What positive effect would that have u know what I mean?

Nuudawn

We are all prisoners of our own perceptions. I guess it's how you look at it. If that's what it means to you...that's what it means. I'm not a day counter. It doesn't work for me for a variety of reasons...one being is in my first few weeks even one damn day seemed like too big a commitment lol. I committed (and still do) to being sober right "now". What I soon discovered is that the "now" commitment helped me on other levels. When I started feeling anxiety about doing something ahead of time that might make me think drinking would make it easier or more comfortable or fun or whatever...well, I got myself out of "the future". I realized that often my anxiety was caused by getting out of my now...whether that was thinking about the future or the past. I only have control over my "now". I take my present as it comes. I deal with arriving situations as they come. I stay in the present cuz it's all I have to do anything with.

gatorgirl67

Ok, I understand your thinking!

I feel like we are all on our different journey coming from different places. Just being on this forum and posting is a yearning for a change, IMO. Even though some may still be fighting the fight, daily...at least thet are coming back and reading the experiences of others, which in turn may help make a change for them.

I joined this forum in July, bascially lurked for two months, still drinking...I wasn't ready to quit when I joined but I kept reading. Something in me wanted to read every day, until I finally said I can do this...Sept 15 was that day.

And if I hit a blip, you can bet I will be back here amongst my friends...who understand.

deeker

You are not accountable to anyone but yourself when choosing to pick up and only you will go through the consequences. People encourage because it's the right thing to do. But your right if you ( anyone)turns that into OK It doesn't matter if I start over tomorrow, Then you aren't ready anyways so it don't matter what anyone says.

If you are ready nothing anyone says can be wrong, if you are not ready nothing we can say is right.

I mean anyone in general. Not directing directly at you lifeunlocked.

GhostFace

The future belongs to those who prepare today. I used to leave everything for tomorrow and never got anything accomplished. It was a big part of my procrastination. I just focus on the now as that is the only thing I could control.

Beanie25

No my point is that, all the time you have the mindset of 'oh well I can just reset the counter cos everyone gets it' where is the accountability for now n just doing the utmost to make it happen yeah? It is not about days, but what is the change overall. Constantly have the optiom of a reset seems just an other excuse to the alcoholic(they don't need the easy option) IMO

pinkdog

Hi life, I liked counting days in early sobriety. For me, it was a measure of progress. An accomplishment. I feel the further you get away from the alcohol, the better. Some people do not like to count. Some do. Do whichever one is the most positive for you. The important thing is no alcohol. Very best wishes to you.

Beanie25

Sorry about the typo's I am still pretty dumb when it comes to technology(yes internet)

Nuudawn

Gosh..that's an interesting perspective. You are so right..it's about change. But I don't think I have ever looked at the day counting as an "oh well" thing that I could just "reset". As a matter of fact the counting thing for some is a huge motivator as they don't want to LOSE their days. And sometimes they beat themselves right into staying in relapse over the loss. As some folks have alluded to...the number of days is an accomplishment therefore a motivator. Hmmm...I guess now that you mention it, some may look at it that way since you do.

How very interesting how one individually looks at something.

deeker

I get it


Getting an accountability partner who will call you on your stuff. In AA they call it a sponsor. Most people who are not ready do not want to be accountable to anyone.And they come here cuz they know they will be accepted and no one will call them on their stuff. Cuz we have no right. It's their life. Therefore they continue to drink until one day they say I am sick and tired of being sick and tired and they are ready to go to any lengths.

The 24 hour club is a form of accountability. And if you look at how many people who view it as compared to those who actually sign in, it just shows you how many people just aren't ready to stop or be accountable to anyone.

Mentium

Sure, but there's only one loser if you do this. I want NOT to drink, not to find excuses to make myself a softer route.